Monday, June 20, 2011

Cut His Mic Off: David Tyree

"Nothing means more to me than that my God would be honored. Being the fact that I firmly believe that God created and ordained marriage between a man and a woman, I believe that's something that should be fought for at all costs. So I'll lay down everything I am to preserve the honor and integrity of the God that I serve......Once you allow something like same-sex marriage, it opens up the door for a continual softening to the backbone of our society, which will, eventually, for generations to come, open the door for, who knows, polygamy, and all other things. "


-- Former New York Giants WR and Super Bowl one-hit wonder David Tyree



This is why we need to have a real NFL offseason, filled with free agency and hot stove, water-cooler chatter: To avoid the idiotic musings of the biblically ignorant. Tyree was asked his thoughts on gay marriage by a reporter from the Daily News as the state of New York are currently debating allowing same-sex marriage in the Empire State. When asked if he would trade his infamous helmet-catch that made him relevant for about 15 minutes in the Big Apple in exchange for men being prevented from marrying other men, Tyree couldn't have said "Yes" quick enough.

Now, I'm a happily-married, heterosexual male. I am by no means some gay rights activist and, while I love my wife, I'm not even the biggest cheerleader on marriage. I, do, however, we, as human beings, are entitled to our rights and that something as archaic as religion shouldn't stand in between true love between two consenting adults, be it a two guys, two girls or what have you. I also am what bible-thumpers of Tyree's ilk would call an atheist. I consider myself a free thinker and I choose to live my life by my standards and not by some book or by the teachings of a man I am not convinced exists. Call it blasphemy. I don't care. Now, Tyree is more than entitled to his opinion but his comments, beyond being a tad bit extreme and overdramatic, represent the eternal struggle in the battle between God vs. Gay: Why is it that religious folk like Tyree believe that the freedom of thought applies only to what they believe in? Why can't homosexuals express those same liberties and do as they please? Because a book written centuries ago said so? It's amazing that people like Tyree can live in the Internet Age but think in the Stone Age.


Tyree says that he's willing to give up the one thing that made him relevant enough to provide these quotes in exchange for preventing the rights of another group of people. Funny, since it wasn't too long ago that African Americans like Tyree didn't have many rights themselves. It wasn't THAT far back in this nation's history that this country was tainted by the ignorance of segregation. Of course, those days are over now, so it's more than O.K. for one minority to tell another what they can and cannot have, so long as God is along for the ride to co-sign, right? How would Tyree have felt if Babe Ruth said "I'd give up every last one of my 714 home runs if it meant a black guy could never step foot on a professional sports team." That'd be pretty fucked up, wouldn't it? Shouldn't someone like Tyree, a black man who must have read a thing or two about the same kind of discrimination that he's showing toward gays, be a bit more sympathetic for a group of people desperately fighting for equality? Sure, gay marriage isn't the Civil Rights Movement, but it still has significance to a large group of people, even if "God" and his minions don't think much of it.


Here's my other issue with the fortified stance guys like Tyree seem to take against gay marriage: Who exactly does it hurt if gays get married? Is Tyree's marriage in danger if, say, Lance Bass married Ryan Seacrest? Will the world explode if Portia Di Rossi has Amber Heard put a ring on it? Of all the problems that plague this world, with people dying of cancer around the globe on a daily basis, with men and women in THIS COUNTRY fighting for our freedoms in the Middle East and risking their lives, the biggest issue that David Tyree feels need to be abolished is......gay marriage? Because Chaz and Percy in Apt. 4C saying "I do" somehow punches all our tickets to Hell, Dave? It seems rich that Tyree proclaims that he'd give up the helmet catch to stop gay marriage since, without said catch, he'd be lucky to receive questions from a Rosetta Stone survey. Also, have you taken a walk around New York City, David? It's not exactly Provo, Utah. There's A LOT of gay guys in NYC, my dude. And, guess what, they can read! So have fun walking around the metro, now that your thoughts are out there, while every gay man within 50 feet stares at you with the same disgust and disdain that you have when you see a commercial for "Queer As Folk".


In the meantime, The BoomRoasted Bible has struck down upon you the power of having your mic cut off!

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