It was after watching this past Monday's edition of Monday Night Raw that I started to wonder: What if other sports were scripted, too? What if creative writers stood behind the scenes in closed offices pondering exciting World Series after exciting World Series? You're telling me sports wouldn't be at least somewhat exciting if every game was choreographed and every result preordained for the sole purpose of maximizing entertainment value? Hell, there are conspiracy theorists out there who live to find excuses to claim the fix is in. We enjoy sports for being the "theater of the unexpected". Every great moment is much more tantalizing to us because it's organic. Part of the downer to sports movies, at least to people like me, is that they always have that storybook ending(for the most part) which, in turn, lessens the enjoyment of it all because it lacks realism(except for, say, Friday Night Lights, which was based on a true story so it lacked that miracle final drive that seems to be the lynchpin of every football movie). Every underdog story doesn't have to end with Rocky Balboa knocking out Ivan Drago or with the Mighty Ducks rallying past long odds. That's the joy of real sports. They don't always have a fairytale ending.
There are some moments, however, where everything falls into place that you start to wonder what's in the cards. Some sports stories are just a little too good of a mix of fate and coincidence to not seem fixed. These are the moments that make me go "Hmmm....".
*In yet another turbulent offseason, Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is accused of sexual assault not once, but twice, by two different women in two different locales. The firestorm of controversy leads to whirlwind of speculation of whether Big Ben has seen his last days in the Steel City and whether the once-seemingly untradable franchise cornerstone now finds himself on the block. The Steelers opt to keep Roethlisberger, who sits out the four games of the season due to a suspension. What happens afterward? Roethisberger comes back and leads the Steelers to his third Super Bowl in six years. Pittsburgh inevitably loses to Green Bay, denying us the greatest fan turnaround since the city of Los Angeles suddenly rallied behind enigmatic superstar Kobe Bryant following a stretch that saw him get knocked for his own sexual assault beef, force Shaquille O'Neal out of town and then demand a trade out of Hollywood himself before winning a couple rings on his own.
That's not to say we didn't get something out of that Steelers-Packers championship game. Aaron Rodgers, who sat behind Packers icon Brett Favre for three years before assuming control of the Packers offense only after a nasty split between Green Bay and Favre, wins his first Super Bowl ring. Why is it important? Because it just so happened to come in Favre's final season as a pro. It was also a season that saw Rodgers topple Favre twice after Favre took his frustrations out on his young understudy in their first two encounters. It was a fitting end to a what was a tumultuous couple of years for Favre, Rodgers and the Packers and it ended with the heir apparent on top while the once-mighty iron man laid crumpled in a scrap heap no longer able to play the game he once dominated. It was an ending that seemed almost too good to be true.
*Speaking of iron men, Peyton Manning played in 227 straight games for the Indianapolis Colts. Following the 2010 season, however, Manning underwent a few surgeries on his ailing neck. Recovery from those procedures was slow and despite early speculation that Manning would be ready for this past season's opener against Houston, Manning finally bit the bullet and was forced to sit. One week became a whole season and the Colts were suddenly without their four-time NFL MVP and franchise player. The loss of Manning was devastating to the Colts but also an example that even the toughest of men are human and that the Colts may need to look into bringing in a successor in upcoming draft. Meanwhile, out west, a Stanford junior by the name of Andrew Luck is putting the finishing touches on a two-year long standing as the best non-pro QB in the country as well as the unquestioned #1 pick in the 2012 NFL Draft. Luck is regarded by many as the highest rated QB prospect to hit the NFL in three decades. Who is the QB that Luck draws the most comparisons to? Peyton Manning. And who ends up with the #1 pick in the 2012 NFL Draft? The Indianapolis Colts. The timing is just uncanny.
To make things even crazier, with Peyton sitting on the sidelines, little brother Eli was putting on a career year and, once again, used a late-season Dallas Cowboys collapse to make the playoffs. Once again, Eli's Giants steam-rolled through the playoffs including a big win over a mighty Packers team. Once again, Eli and company put foot to the asses of Tom Brady and the New England Patriots to win the Super Bowl. Where was this Super Bowl held? In "The House That Peyton Built"......Lucas Oil Stadium. Indianapolis, Indiana.
*Faced with a huge deficit in the final month of the season as well as potentially losing their best player to free agency at the end of the season, the St. Louis Cardinals enter the month of September down 10.5 games to the Atlanta Braves in the National League Wild Card race. Miraculously, the Cardinals win 23 of their final 31 games while the Braves take one of the biggest nosedives in baseball history. Even more miraculously, the Cardinals mows through heavy preseason favorite Philadelphia as well as division rival Milwaukee to make the World Series before dispatching a Texas Rangers team making their second straight World Series appearance in dramatic Game 7 fashion. The final two months of the Cardinals season featured some heavy lifting from its aforementioned soon-to-be free agent slugger Albert Pujols. Every Pujols at-bat in every Cardinals elimination game was met with a "this could be the final at-bat for Albert Pujols as a St. Louis Cardinal" from Joe Buck as the playoffs commenced.
*Faced with a huge deficit in the final month of the season as well as potentially losing their best player to free agency at the end of the season, the St. Louis Cardinals enter the month of September down 10.5 games to the Atlanta Braves in the National League Wild Card race. Miraculously, the Cardinals win 23 of their final 31 games while the Braves take one of the biggest nosedives in baseball history. Even more miraculously, the Cardinals mows through heavy preseason favorite Philadelphia as well as division rival Milwaukee to make the World Series before dispatching a Texas Rangers team making their second straight World Series appearance in dramatic Game 7 fashion. The final two months of the Cardinals season featured some heavy lifting from its aforementioned soon-to-be free agent slugger Albert Pujols. Every Pujols at-bat in every Cardinals elimination game was met with a "this could be the final at-bat for Albert Pujols as a St. Louis Cardinal" from Joe Buck as the playoffs commenced.
With all that foreshadowing already in place, Pujols spent the offseason celebrating his second World Series championship, getting wined and dined by a suddenly wealthy Miami Marlins team, flirting with the idea of staying in Nellyville before agreeing to take a large wad of cash from the Los Angeles Angels and leaving St. Louis with what once seemed like unlikely final memories.
*Starving for years for a competent point guard to run Mike D'Antoni's intricate fast-paced offense, the New York Knicks were considered to be stuck in a rut having dealt all of its trade assets in a deal to acquire small forward Carmelo Anthony, thus making them unable to strike a deal for Chris Paul or Deron Williams. The team gets desperate and signs former All-Star Baron Davis with the hopes that a fiery Madison Square Garden crowd will bring B-Diddy back to life and back to relevance. Instead, Davis' back sends him back to his usual spot at the end of the bench in street clothes, unable to return til March. Injuries take their toll on the Knicks' point guard depth and the team strikes a deal to bring in a lanky Asian kid from Harvard left for dead by his hometown Golden State Warriors and the Houston Rockets. In just his second game logging significant playing time as a Knick, Jeremy Lin explodes for 25 points and 7 assists against D-Will and the New York Knicks a night after sleeping on the couch of teammate Landry Fields and all while Knicks suits debated cutting Lin loose. Lin follows up his breakout performance by notching his first start and going for 28 and 8 against Utah. Suddenly, Jeremy Lin was the biggest thing in the Big Apple a day after the New York Giants won the Super Bowl. Just a few days after Big Blue held its ticker-tape parade in NYC hoising the Lombardi Trophy, Lin outduels Kobe Bryant and the Lakers and scores a career-high 38 points in front of a frenzied MSG crowd. By the end of his first week as starter, "Linsanity" commences and every borderline creative human within 100 miles of the Metro area cultivates their own personal Lin-inspired puns. In the span of two weeks, Jeremy Lin goes from NBA afterthought to the most dangerous Asian to hit New York since Jackie Chan filmed "Rumble In The Bronx" and the Knicks are currently riding a seven-game win streak with Lin at the helm. What was once Carmelo Anthony's team now has been peppered with asanine questions like "Can 'Melo fit in with Linsanity?". If Lin somehow leads these Knicks to the NBA championship, not only will I be calling bullshit but I'll be turning off my TV for 2 months and cancelling my Twitter account.
*Starving for years for a competent point guard to run Mike D'Antoni's intricate fast-paced offense, the New York Knicks were considered to be stuck in a rut having dealt all of its trade assets in a deal to acquire small forward Carmelo Anthony, thus making them unable to strike a deal for Chris Paul or Deron Williams. The team gets desperate and signs former All-Star Baron Davis with the hopes that a fiery Madison Square Garden crowd will bring B-Diddy back to life and back to relevance. Instead, Davis' back sends him back to his usual spot at the end of the bench in street clothes, unable to return til March. Injuries take their toll on the Knicks' point guard depth and the team strikes a deal to bring in a lanky Asian kid from Harvard left for dead by his hometown Golden State Warriors and the Houston Rockets. In just his second game logging significant playing time as a Knick, Jeremy Lin explodes for 25 points and 7 assists against D-Will and the New York Knicks a night after sleeping on the couch of teammate Landry Fields and all while Knicks suits debated cutting Lin loose. Lin follows up his breakout performance by notching his first start and going for 28 and 8 against Utah. Suddenly, Jeremy Lin was the biggest thing in the Big Apple a day after the New York Giants won the Super Bowl. Just a few days after Big Blue held its ticker-tape parade in NYC hoising the Lombardi Trophy, Lin outduels Kobe Bryant and the Lakers and scores a career-high 38 points in front of a frenzied MSG crowd. By the end of his first week as starter, "Linsanity" commences and every borderline creative human within 100 miles of the Metro area cultivates their own personal Lin-inspired puns. In the span of two weeks, Jeremy Lin goes from NBA afterthought to the most dangerous Asian to hit New York since Jackie Chan filmed "Rumble In The Bronx" and the Knicks are currently riding a seven-game win streak with Lin at the helm. What was once Carmelo Anthony's team now has been peppered with asanine questions like "Can 'Melo fit in with Linsanity?". If Lin somehow leads these Knicks to the NBA championship, not only will I be calling bullshit but I'll be turning off my TV for 2 months and cancelling my Twitter account.
(Quick rant: The Jeremy Lin story is a feel-good story for everyone, especially those who had to routinely make believers out of doubters and triumph over long odds. That being said, the "Linsanity" over the last 10 days is Exhibit A of things I hate about sports in the Twitter/round-the-clock sports news era. In an era where it doesn't take much to be a celebrity, Lin's impressive run has somehow morphed him into a national superstar and has forced commentators and sports anchors to toss around words like "legacy" and "illustrious career". Seven games doesn't make an illustrious career and it damn sure doesn't give you a legacy. Jeremy Lin's standing is more an example of perseverance and front office ignorance than the start of a Hall of Fame career. Lin has toppled one quality team during his breakout run and that was a Lakers team where he was being guarded by human turnstile Derek Fisher. I'm not saying Lin's emergence isn't worth talking about or even getting excited about, especially to a Knicks fan base that has suffered for years while Isiah Thomas managed them into the cellar, but what I am saying is we need to pump the brakes. Seven games doesn't make you an All-Star, as some have campaigned for Lin to be and, as we've seen with Tim Tebow, the same people who are with you when you're riding high will be the first to turn on you when things fall apart......and there's no more likely a place for this to happen than in the fickle city of New York.)
Still not convinced that something funny's going on? How about we step outside the sports world and into the music world for a second, shall we?
*One night before the 2012 Grammys are set to kick off, legendary singer and 80's-90's icon Whitney Houston is found dead in her bathtub at age 48. Houston, the greatest singer of her generation and a classic cautionary tale of the effect drug and alcohol addiction can have on a human being, becomes the biggest story of a Grammy night that was already lacking much in terms of living star power(with the exception of Adele, who would have been a much bigger story if not for Houston's passing sombering out the mood). Suddenly, despite not registering a positive blip on the radar since 1998(despite a couple albums and movies afterward and comeback tour, none of which as impressive as '98's "My Love Is Your Love" album, which went quadruple platinum....you know, back when record sales meant something), "fans", who refused to admit they forgotten about her and had written her off while she battling addiction to cocaine and other substances, suddenly stormed social media outlets with half-hearted remembrance tweets, videos and obligatory condolences. It's the biggest impact Houston has had in the music world in more than a decade, besides being the go-to punchline for every hack comic over the last 10 years. Much like America did with Michael Jackson, the country seemed to magically forget about all of the issues that lead to Houston's downfall and spent the 36 hours after her death highlighting all the good the once-legendary diva had done.
(Quick rant #2: Again, if you follow me on Twitter or are friends with me on Facebook, you already know about my reaction to the posthumous theatrics. I have nothing personal against Whitney Houston, except I was never a huge fan of her music. That's not to say I don't acknowledge her talent. It's just heterosexual males trying to find a girl on a Friday night don't cruise down the block blasting "I'm Every Woman". There will never be another Whitney Houston. Her vocal gifts are incomparable, with Mariah Carey being the only modern star who could possibly come close. That being said, her demise was completely and utterly of her own doing. It's hard for me to find sympathy for someone who has all the means in the world to get themselves better from whatever addiction that ails them.
Whitney Houston died from too much Xanax and Stoli. She didn't die of cancer, like Hall of Fame catcher Gary Carter did this afternoon. Somehow, I don't see Carter getting the much-ballyhooed farewell that Houston got these last few days. Houston's death was tragic but the biggest tragedy is the phonies who felt compelled to storm the Internet with their pretend sadness over the loss of someone they never knew and barely cared about for at least a decade prior to her untimely demise. I said this in my Michael Jackson tribute and it was reinforced in the hours following Whitney's death: America is a nation of fad jumpers. Houston's death was the relevant moment of the day and, God forbid, we let a big name like this fall without giving her the same song and dance we gave Jacko. The truth is, nobody cared about Whitney Houston until she was lifeless in her own bathtub. The cliche "you don't know what you have until it's gone" couldn't be more true when you step back and see the slew of people posting "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" for the first time in ages. The reaction to Whitney's death wasn't a true dedication. It was the equivalent of people dressing up for an 80's theme party. Let's see who is still playing "I Will Always Love You" by St. Patrick's Day.
If people truly care about the life and death of Whitney Houston, then they will use her death as a reminder that tomorrow isn't promised and that the tyranny of drugs can turn a precious life into shit in the speed of a Randy Johnson fastball. Jay-Z once said "Everybody wants to be Bobby Brown but to be Bobby then, you gotta be Bobby now.". There will never be another Whitney Houston, which is why should use her death as opportunity for that statement to be true for both her rise to the top as well as her fall to the bottom.)
I'm not saying Whitney Houston staged her death to happen before the music world's biggest night, but can you think of a better time to maximize the final seconds of a dwindling career?
Still not convinced that something funny's going on? How about we step outside the sports world and into the music world for a second, shall we?
*One night before the 2012 Grammys are set to kick off, legendary singer and 80's-90's icon Whitney Houston is found dead in her bathtub at age 48. Houston, the greatest singer of her generation and a classic cautionary tale of the effect drug and alcohol addiction can have on a human being, becomes the biggest story of a Grammy night that was already lacking much in terms of living star power(with the exception of Adele, who would have been a much bigger story if not for Houston's passing sombering out the mood). Suddenly, despite not registering a positive blip on the radar since 1998(despite a couple albums and movies afterward and comeback tour, none of which as impressive as '98's "My Love Is Your Love" album, which went quadruple platinum....you know, back when record sales meant something), "fans", who refused to admit they forgotten about her and had written her off while she battling addiction to cocaine and other substances, suddenly stormed social media outlets with half-hearted remembrance tweets, videos and obligatory condolences. It's the biggest impact Houston has had in the music world in more than a decade, besides being the go-to punchline for every hack comic over the last 10 years. Much like America did with Michael Jackson, the country seemed to magically forget about all of the issues that lead to Houston's downfall and spent the 36 hours after her death highlighting all the good the once-legendary diva had done.
(Quick rant #2: Again, if you follow me on Twitter or are friends with me on Facebook, you already know about my reaction to the posthumous theatrics. I have nothing personal against Whitney Houston, except I was never a huge fan of her music. That's not to say I don't acknowledge her talent. It's just heterosexual males trying to find a girl on a Friday night don't cruise down the block blasting "I'm Every Woman". There will never be another Whitney Houston. Her vocal gifts are incomparable, with Mariah Carey being the only modern star who could possibly come close. That being said, her demise was completely and utterly of her own doing. It's hard for me to find sympathy for someone who has all the means in the world to get themselves better from whatever addiction that ails them.
Whitney Houston died from too much Xanax and Stoli. She didn't die of cancer, like Hall of Fame catcher Gary Carter did this afternoon. Somehow, I don't see Carter getting the much-ballyhooed farewell that Houston got these last few days. Houston's death was tragic but the biggest tragedy is the phonies who felt compelled to storm the Internet with their pretend sadness over the loss of someone they never knew and barely cared about for at least a decade prior to her untimely demise. I said this in my Michael Jackson tribute and it was reinforced in the hours following Whitney's death: America is a nation of fad jumpers. Houston's death was the relevant moment of the day and, God forbid, we let a big name like this fall without giving her the same song and dance we gave Jacko. The truth is, nobody cared about Whitney Houston until she was lifeless in her own bathtub. The cliche "you don't know what you have until it's gone" couldn't be more true when you step back and see the slew of people posting "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" for the first time in ages. The reaction to Whitney's death wasn't a true dedication. It was the equivalent of people dressing up for an 80's theme party. Let's see who is still playing "I Will Always Love You" by St. Patrick's Day.
If people truly care about the life and death of Whitney Houston, then they will use her death as a reminder that tomorrow isn't promised and that the tyranny of drugs can turn a precious life into shit in the speed of a Randy Johnson fastball. Jay-Z once said "Everybody wants to be Bobby Brown but to be Bobby then, you gotta be Bobby now.". There will never be another Whitney Houston, which is why should use her death as opportunity for that statement to be true for both her rise to the top as well as her fall to the bottom.)
I'm not saying Whitney Houston staged her death to happen before the music world's biggest night, but can you think of a better time to maximize the final seconds of a dwindling career?
No comments:
Post a Comment