Week 15 Picks cont...

Both men bring undefeated Week 15 records into Sunday after nailing two easy lay-ups in Atlanta and Dallas.

On to the rest of Week 15....

Redskins (+6.5) at Giants

Dave: Giants - When I told you last year that Jason Pierre-Paul was going to be a monster, I hope you listened to me. Right now, the Redskins' best strategy is to just punt the last three games in hopes of landing someone like RGIII or Matt Barkley. The Giants need to win out and they have all the momentum after yet another comeback victory, this time against Dallas. Eli goes for 300 here, JPP notches two more sacks and Gabe stands on his couch in a wife-beater and a Jesus piece while listening to "Lean Back" and doing the Rockaway at halftime. Giants by 13.

Gabe: Giants - My Giants have all of the momentum in the world right now. They finally got off the schneid, thanks in large part to Jason Garrett mismanaging the end of last Sunday night's game. JPP goes off and the Giants offense overwhelms the Redskins D. Giants by two touchdowns.

Packers (-13.5) at Chiefs

Dave: Packers - How angry would I be if my Packers lost to my wife's Chiefs? I told my wife it would be the equivalent of me coming home from a 23-hour shift at work to find her in a threesome with two other dudes while she was simultaneously stabbing both of our cats. Unless Romeo Crennel knows something about Ricky Stanzi that the world doesn't, I see this being another W for Titletown even without Greg Jennings. If it's not....this may very well be the last blog you read from me. Packers by 17.

Gabe: Chiefs - Quite simply, I think two touchdowns is too big of a spread. I have no real logical reason to think the Chiefs are even capable of hanging with the Packers, but two touchdowns is a huge number and I'd love to see the look on Dave's face if the Packers fuck around and lose this game.

Saints (-7.5) at Vikings

Dave: Saints - It's not a good sign when you have a QB controversy this late in the season.....even worse a sign if that battle is between Joe Webb and Christian Ponder. Less of a dispute and more unnerving for Viking fans is the fact that Adrian Peterson returns this week. What does that mean for their chances against N'awlins? Well, nothing, but it gives them a puncher's chance of staying within a touchdown. More likely, though, is Drew Brees carving up this horrid Vikings defense and Saints winning by double digits. Also, someday, somebody will explain to me how Leslie Frazier was able to keep his job after a season like this.

Gabe: Saints - Drew Brees is going to go off today and if the Vikings think they can run with the Saints, they are playing right into Drew Brees' hands. He loves a shootout. Saints by 14.

Seahawks (+3.5) at Bears

Dave: Seahawks - This Bears offense is stagnant without Jay Cutler and even more lifeless with Matt Forte out. The Seahawks are hardly "The Greatest Show On Turf" but they've managed to pull off a few upsets over some heavy hitters(Giants, Ravens) with the occasional offensive explosion. At the very least, Seattle keeps this within a field goal. More likely, Marshawn Lynch puts a dent in this Bears defense and derails their playoff hopes with an upset at Soldier Field. Seahawks by 6.

Gabe: Seahawks - The Seahawks are quietly getting their shit together. At the same time Chicago is falling apart. I honestly don't think the Chicago offense can keep up. I'll take the Seahawks for the straight up win.

Dolphins (+1.5) at Bills

Dave: Bills - I'm not sure why I keep riding with Buffalo except the fact that this game will be played in the cold, the Dolphins can't really run the ball and they just fired their head coach after he rallied the team back from an 0-7 start to win four of his last five. If that doesn't spell a team going into the tank as a final "Fuck you!" to the powers-that-be, then I'm not sure what will. Bills get one last W to salvage what once looked like a dream season. Buffalo by 7.

Gabe: Miami - I would like the Dolphins a lot more in the game if they hadn't just fired their coach. They were winning games and had some momentum. Buffalo has gone back to being terrible. I'll take a flyer and take Miami and the points.

Titans (-6.5) at Colts

Dave: Titans - I was going to continue my trend from last week and just write "Next!" but I wanted to say one quick thing. If voters rob Aaron Rodgers of a unanimous victory for the NFL MVP after he's put on one of the greatest QB seasons in history for a team that might go undefeated because they can't somehow detach their mouths from Peyton Manning's penis, then SHAME..ON...THEM. With or without Peyton Manning, this Colts team was going to be worse than in years' past. 0-16 bad? No. Potentially 5-11? Absolutely. Enough's enough with the Peyton Manning MVP hype.

Gabe: Titans - Next!

Bengals (-7) at Rams

Dave: Bengals - Andy Dalton vs. Kellen Clemens in a battle of two QB's who look like shortstops. Many have Dalton winning the ROTY but I really think he and A.J. Green will have a Willis McGahee-Ken Dorsey for the Heisman effect come voting time. Can you really make the case that one would have been as good without the other? I think the two cancel out and Cam Newton wins this one going away. If your only argument for Dalton is his team has more wins than Newton's, then you have no argument. I don't believe in team accomplishments affecting individual awards. Maybe that's just me. As for this game, I can't see St. Louis notching more than 6 points here. Bengals by 17.

Gabe: Bengals - The Bengals have been beating bad teams and losing to good ones. The Rams suck. Bengals by 11.

Lions (-1) at Raiders

Dave: Lions - A couple factors here: Ndomukong Suh is back and pissed off. The Lions are desperate to stay in the playoff hunt with Chicago having a potential gimme against Seattle, the Falcons blowing out Jacksonville and New York or Dallas on their heels. Also, Carson Palmer just looks plain awful since "unretiring". The Raiders are going to give Matt Stafford plenty of opportunities to go for 400 yards and 5 scores against them thanks to Palmer's Mr. Magoo passing accuracy. I'm thinking Lions by 10.

Gabe: Lions - Suh is going to keep it together for at least one game, right? Either way, the Lions are still fighting to get into the playoffs and need this win. Stafford should have a nice game. Lions by a touchdown.

Patriots (-7.5) at Broncos

Dave: Patriots - I fancy myself a Tim Tebow fan but even I recognize this as a battle of two overhyped evils. The media thinks everything Tebow does is magic and a win here will turn him from Football Jesus to an actual God. As for Brady, the man can never do any wrong in the eyes of the sports media so a win here will be just a day at the park for him. However, Brady comes into this for the first time in a while as NOT the most hyped QB on the field. The Patriots have had to hear Tebow's name all week. You really think Bill Belichick, who successfully outsmarted a cerebral assassin like Peyton Manning for a few years, hasn't spent tireless man hours coming up with a scheme to control Touchdown Timmy and finally put a stop to all this Tebow madness? Denver's not going to keep up with the Brady Bunch offensively. Pats by 14.

Gabe: Patriots - Did anyone see the Tim Tebow sketch on SNL last night? Outstanding. I think Tom Brady won't say it out loud, but he and Coach Hoodie want to win this game 49-0. I think the Pats go up big and do it early and take all of the steam out of the game. Pats by 17.

Jets (+2.5) at Eagles

Dave: Jets - A battle between two teams that should have been a lot better this season that also possess two excellent secondaries. This game will come down to who can run the ball because passing will be at a premium. We know Philly can't stop the run. We know, every now and then, New York can. We know the Jets are a smashmouth defense. We know Michael Vick is made of paper mache. I think Vince Young makes an appearance here and the Jets romp while Andy Reid gets booed out of the building. Jets by 16.

Gabe: Eagles - The Eagles' offense is really fast. I think they are too fast for the Jets. The Eagles are also at home and clinging to slim playoff hopes. They need this win. It will be a close game, but I think the Eagles get a late TD and win by 4.

Browns (+7) at Cardinals

Dave: Cardinals - Seneca Wallace vs. John Skelton.....I'd rather have my wife stand on my balls in high heels than watch this game. Joe Haden is going to put the clamps on Larry Fitzgerald so any thoughts that this will be even remotely exciting ends there. More likely, it's a field goal battle for the first three quarters before Patrick Peterson runs off another punt return TD and Arizona wins 10-6 with Jose Valverde picking up the save. And, yes, I know that means the Cardinals won't cover, but I really couldn't care less about this game.

Gabe: Browns - I was going to try to make an argument less coherent than Dave's for this game, but I'm not sure that's possible. No way the Cardinals win this by more than a touchdown. They'll win by 4 at the most, if they win at all.

Ravens (-2.5) at Chargers

Dave: Ravens - San Diego has nothing to play for, their coach is getting canned in three weeks and they are facing a team with a stout defense that could potentially wrap up the division and maybe even the one seed with a win here. I always worry about Joe Flacco playing where national TV cameras are also present but this Chargers team has been so putrid that I don't even think Flacco can screw this up. Ravens by 13 behind another big day from Ray Rice.

Gabe: Ravens - The Ravens defense is too good. The Chargers love to yack, especially in primetime. Ravens by 10.

Steelers (+3) at Niners

Dave: Steelers - No Maurkice Pouncey. No James Harrison and a hobbled Big Ben probably giving it a go against the best run defense in the country. This should be all San Fran, right? Wrong. As much of an impact James Harrison has for this defense, the Steelers will find a way to dominate without him. The Steelers are also pretty good against the run, too, which means the Niners are going to have to keep Pittsburgh at a distance by using the passing game. I like the Steelers' chances of moving the ball against a Pat Willis-less defense moreso than Alex Smith against this new Steel Curtain. Steelers use veteran experience to not crumble under the bright light of MNF and Alex Smith finds Troy Polamalu for the game-winning pick-6. And if you think this is bad, Niners fans, how about this: a loss here potentially drops you to the three seed and a possible date with Dallas, who beat the Niners back in Week 2. One and done for Jim Harbaugh's boys? You never know.

Gabe: Niners - The Steelers have to do all that traveling and are hobbled. The Pouncey injury could turn out to be huge. This will be a close, smash-mouth game, but I'll take the Niners to get the 4 point win.

Week 15 Picks

It's coming down to the wire with three weeks to play! Gabe shortened Dave's lead to just two after a slightly less terrible Week 14.

On to Week 15 and tonight's unwatchable Jags-Falcons clash as well as the slightly-more-entertaining-for-sheer-comedic-purposes that is Cowboys-Bucs on Saturday night.

LAST WEEK

Gabe: 8-7-1

Dave: 6-9-1

SEASON

Dave: 103-99-9

Gabe: 101-101-9

Jaguars (+11.5) at Falcons

Dave: Falcons - Not as easy as a pick as it seems. For some reason, this Falcons offense is on cruise control so any preliminary thoughts of this being a 42-3 rout need to be tempered. The Falcons do stop the run well and that's really the only way Jacksonville moves the ball. Still, while this game will be hard to watch, I think we're looking at something closer to 28-10 than 35-0 because, other than Green Bay, nobody is really blowing scrubs out of the water on a consistent basis. Falcons by 14.

Gabe: Falcons

Cowboys (-7) at Bucs

Dave: Cowboys - I was tempted to go with Tampa given Dallas' December woes.....and then I saw this. On the one hand, Jay Ratliff flying off the handle at a reporter can be seen as a loss of composure. I see it, however, as bad news for the middle of Tampa's offensive line. The Bucs turn the ball over A LOT. Josh Freeman has 18 INT's on the season and RB LaGarrette Blount has lost five fumbles. Those numbers might not matter much against this shit-show of a secondary, but I'll take anger and desperation over talented and mistake-prone. Cowboys by 10.

Gabe: Cowboys

Week 15 Picks

Yet another Thursday night showdown between a MVP candidate and a QB who will be throwing lobs in the UFL next year. Phillip Rivers! Alex Smith! It's FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN-TASTIC. (Zzzzzzzz....).

49ers (+9.5) at Chargers

Dave: Chargers - Both teams are in desperation mode, as a loss pretty much ends their scant hopes at taking their respective divisions. I hate taking San Diego with a spread larger than seven because they always seem to disappoint(with the exception of last week, but that was against a Matt Cassel-less Chiefs team at home). I think Phillip Rivers has a better chance of having a field day on this Niner secondary than Alex Smith does of repeating his performance from last week's shocker against Seattle. So, begrudgingly, Mr. Thursday Night(5-2 this season on Thursday games, and winner of two straight), will take the Chargers here by 10.

Gabe: Chargers - The Niners stink. I still think San Diego is for real. The Chargers win big.

Week 15 Picks

We get two NFL Network games that will be seen by no one, both of which involve of the currently undefeated teams in the league. We'll pick those games now and then do the rest of the league on Sunday morning as usual.

Let's get Week 15 started....

Indianapolis (-3) at Jacksonville

Gabe: Jacksonville - I firmly believe the Colts are not going 16-0. I've been doubting them all year and they have been making me look like a fool. Well, the Colts are banged up. They are playing on a short week. Jacksonville is a divisional opponent and knows the Colts well. The Jags always play the Colts tough and would love nothing more than to be the team that ends to Colts winning streak. So, I'll take Mojo D to run wild over the Colts tattered defense and lead the Jags to win a close, physical game. Upset special? Sure, why not.

Dave: Indianapolis - Sure, the Colts are on a short week. So are the Jags. Sure, the Colts are banged up, but 50% of the Colts has to be better than all of a Jags team that quit two months ago, right? Remember, this is the same Jags team that got a 41-0 curb-stomping from the Seahawks a while back. THE SEAHAWKS! The thing about Indy is that when you think they're going to finally have a let down, they don't. They could have legitimately lost to any of the last few teams they've played(Pats, Texans, Titans, Broncos) and they didn't. The Colts might be missing half the roster but they still have Peyton Manning and, in a night game, that's hard to pick against. I like the Colts by 6.

Dallas (+7.5) at New Orleans

Gabe: New Orleans - I firmly believe the Saints ARE going 16-0. Their coach as already said they are going to play for an unbeaten season, which I think is a great move heading into the playoffs. On top of all that the Cowboys Roy Williams opened his yap with a guarantee this week. I think the Cowboys continue their tiresomely talked about December swoon. I love Drew Breeeeees and the rest of the Saints at home in this spot. Saints by 14.

Dave: New Orleans - You can't go running your mouth when a. you're the highest paid receiver on your team and you're 4th on the team in receiving, b. have hands that are made of titanium and c. play on a team that is absolutely terrible in December. The Saints D isn't great, but on any given Sunday, it finds a way to be better than the opponent's offense. As for the Cowboys' offense, it's Plaxico Burress....as in, it can't stop shooting itself in the foot(or leg, however you want to complete the analogy). I like Drew Brees to expose the Cowboys' secondary(and with DeMarcus Ware woozy, he won't have to worry about the Cowboys' only pass rush threat constantly in his face) and I like Flozell Adams to commit about 8 penalties and not get suspended. Saints by 10.