Milk Carton All-Star of the Week

With our thinking caps well-worn, we went back to the Kenny well once again for a suggestion for this week's Milk Carton All-Star of the Week. Hey, we'll take help where we can get it.

Let's face it, when rattling off the names of successful Asian athletes in recent memory, you wouldn't expect the name Dat Nguyen to come up. However, once you get past the Ichiros and the Yaos and the Michael Changs, Nguyen is on the short list(no pun intended) of stars from the Far East to make it big in America.

Nguyen was a 3rd round pick of the Dallas Cowboys in the 1999 NFL Draft out of Texas A &M. Oddly enough, Nguyen was the Aggies successor to another diminuitive middle linebacker, future Hall of Famer Zach Thomas. At 5'11, 238 pounds, Nguyen wasn't exactly imposing. That didn't stop Nguyen from being a tackling machine while with the Cowboys, even notching an All-Pro nod in 2003. He had 100+ tackles in three of the five seasons he started with Dallas. Inevitably, he retired in 2005 and returned to Dallas as an assistant linebackers coach with the team under Wade Phillips. Earlier this year, Dat went back to his alma mater to take the same position with the Aggies.

So what is someone as accomplished as Nguyen doing as a Milk Carton All-Star? Well, because he's Charlie Anonymous. As great as the numbers look, when's the last time you had a conversation about Dat Nguyen? When's the last time his name even came up in a conversation except by accident when saying either "Who Dat" or "Crank Dat Soulja Boy"? Truth be told, I didn't even know that Dat Nguyen wasn't the same kid who played Harry Ioki on "21 Jumpstreet"(Turns out, that was Dustin Nguyen....thanks, IMDB!) until about two years ago. Regardless, with the continent of Asia preparing to get its tail handed to them in the World Cup next month, we felt it was right to give our buddies on the Far East a little face time.

So let's give it up for the the Vietnamese Dexter Coakley......Dat Nguyen, everybody!

Is Putting the Super Bowl in the New York Area a Good Idea?

The short answer is mostly no with a little yes.

The answer is no for anyone who has to play in the game, coach in the game, watch the game from the stands, or who wants to see the best possible product on the field for the sport's premier game.

It is a great idea for anyone who is there for the circus that surrounds the Super Bowl, but doesn't particularly care about the game. That means executives from sponsors, owners and execs. of teams not involved in the game, the non-sports media who cover the game.

So here is good:

- New York is the greatest city in the country and there is not a city better built to handle the event.

- The stadium will still be new.

- The weather will be cold so the executive types won't want to go to the game so there will be more tickets available for the average fan.

What is the bad? It's obvious. The weather and how it is going to affect everything. There is no way the temperature is going to be above 20 at game time. Also, there will probably be a good chance of snow or some kind of nasty precipitation. Last year, on Super Bowl Sunday, the east coast was getting hammered with snow. And remember, the wind swirls in the current stadium and probably will in the new stadium. That alone is going to mess with the game.

Don't give me this "the best games are played in cold weather" nonsense. There have been like five memorable cold weather games and usually the football wasn't that great. (The exception is when my Giants beat Dave's Packers in -2 degree weather in the NFC Championship game. That was awesome. The game was great and I think Tom Coughlin's face still hasn't recovered.) The games are memorable for a dramatic play or series made more dramatic because of the conditions. For every "Tuck Rule" I can give you ten "Music City Miracles."

It is going to be cold. That is going to drive away the people in the stands. Most of the people in the seats aren't fans of the teams involved. They are, or know, some muckety-muck and are there for the event. They'll be gone by halftime if the temperature is under 30 degrees. The cold alone won't affect the on-field product, but cold combined with other adverse weather conditions will affect them. Chances are, there will be some adverse weather conditions. If that happens the fans at home will start to turn away, and those are the folks the NFL needs. The ratings are what allows the network to charge so much for advertising, which in turn allows them to back dump trucks full of cash at the NFL offices for the rights to air the game.

What it comes down to is this; the owners have made a decision that they wanted, even though the players, coaches, GM's, and most of the fans don't want it. Bob Craft tried to reason it by saying that it will be great to show off the economic recovery in New York. To that I say this....horse shit. New York doesn't need the Super Bowl. They don't need it to show off. New York is going to be great with or without that game.

So now for a solution. I'm not one to bring up a problem without a way to solve it. To me it's straightforward. Set-up a rotation of mostly southern cities with great culture, restaurants, hotels, etc., and give special consideration to cities with domed stadiums like Houston, Dallas, Atlanta, and New Orleans. That way, even it is just raining you can have perfect conditions for a game. Along with the four cities already mentioned, San Diego, Phoenix, Miami, Tampa Bay, and Charlotte could be on that list. Every now and then throw a northern city a bone, but only if they have a dome, like Minneapolis or Detroit.

And did you see Roger Goodell when he made the announcement? Could he have been more nonchalant? Even he doesn't want it in New York.

New York is a great city, the greatest city. But they don't need the Super Bowl XLVIII and for 2014 the NFL should have put it somewhere else.

World Cup Group D

Time is running out for me to get all of these previews done before the start of the World Cup Final on June 11th. So let's soldier on and talk about Group D.

A few words on the group as a whole. Each team finished first in their respective qualifiers and each team has some of the famous World Cup mojo and history working for them. Also, this group should be of particular interest because the winner of this group will play the runner-up of Group C, which could be the Americans.

Group D
Australia
Germany
Ghana
Serbia

Who will win?
Germany, but it will be close.

Who could win?
Any team in the group.

Who has no chance?
No one. This group is wide open.

How they'll finish:

4. Australia - It's a shame for the Socceroos to be placed in this group. Soccer has long been an also-ran sport in the minds of the Aussies. That changed in '06 in Germany when they marched into the second round and then got jobbed in a match against Italy. They were locked in a scoreless time in stoppage time when Italy was awarded a penalty kick on questionable dive that was later shown to be blatant. This year the 'Roos have a few players with premiership talent, but rely on athleticism more than skill. And like I said before, it's a shame because they are in a group loaded with skill. Then again this group is a crap shoot. I am putting the Aussies fourth because I have to rank them, but I will not be surprised if they finish in the top two of the group and advance.


3. Serbia - The Serbians are competing on their own (as in, without Montenegro, or as part of Yugoslavia) for the first time. Along with some premiership talent, they will be given a boost from the addition of American Neven Subotic, playing for his birth nation. He is a big physical player he has cut his teeth as a part of top-tier Bundesliga team Borussia Dortmund. Two other things they have going for them are their tough defensive style of play and coach Radomir Antic. Antic has turned a team with a history of infighting to a cohesive unit that plays like a "family." I just don't think it will be enough to catch Ghana or Germany.


2. Ghana - I'm putting the Black Stars second, but with reservations. I am counting on superstar Michael Essien being fit to play. He announced last week that he expects to be healthy in time for the Cup, and may even be ready for a June 5th friendly against Latvia. Essien and a healthy Sulley Muntari will provide a huge boost for a team that is loaded with youthful experience. In Germany in '06 they had the youngest team in the field. In 2009 their U20 team beat Brazil to win the U20 World Cup. Like I said, youthful experience. These characteristics are most evident in forward Asamoah Gyan. He was only 20 when he competed on the Cup in team in '06 and all he did was score three-quarters of the team's goals. Lastly, do not discount the benefit of playing on their home continent. With all due respect to the Ivory Coast, Ghana might have the best team in Africa and should look forward to getting to the round of 16, if not further.


1. Germany - I wish I had the onions to pick a different team, but I don't. Injuries and all, I am still going with the Germans to win the group. The Germans have major issues with their midfield. They have lost Christian Trasch and captain Michael Ballack to injury. The Germans don't seem to have a lot of top tier talent, but they do have some talented youngsters. It might sound funny to call them a team of upstarts, but that might be an apt description. Chief among the young players in midfielder Mesut Ozil. He is only 21 and has already cracked into the starting line-up. He was also voted by his peers as the top player of the first half of the season in the Bundesliga. The Germans are the historical power and even with their injuries are talented. I expect them to finish at the top, but would not at all be surprised if they were knocked off.

NBA Free Agency Primer

You may have heard this at least once between now and the last two years but this summer's crop of NBA free agents....well, it's pretty stacked. In an effort to apply some blanket coverage on the subject so we aren't boring everybody with a weekly "Where's LeBron going?" piece like so many of the major news sites are going to(I'm looking at you, ESPN!), I've decided to weigh in on where I think the big name SHOULD go(keyword: SHOULD...I don't want people saying "Well, I thought you said LeBron's going to New York!"). So here's my take on this summer's spending spree and I (just me, personally, I can't speak for Gabe) can assure you that, with both of us covering NBA teams for ProSportsBlogging this summer(Gabe on the Spurs, myself on the Wizards, that this will be the last time you hear about this before free agency kicks off July 1st.

1. LeBron James(Current team: Cleveland Cavaliers, as if you didn't know)

Breakdown: I shouldn't have to give you King James' resume, so I won't. The last few weeks, LeBron's been picked apart more than Heidi Montag on the surgeon's table. He went from winning his second MVP and being a sure-shot to taking home his first ring to, all of a sudden, a Karl Malone clone who will never win the big one because he lacks "killer instinct" after getting eliminated by the Celtics. Then came the report that James' mother may or may not have had "the relations" with LeBron's teammate Delonte West. With the early exit, everyone has now had extra time to give their take on LeBron's offseason plans.

Where he SHOULD go: A friend of mine asked me "If your mother slept with your co-worker, would you leave for another company or stay and have him fired?". I chose to leave. If LeBron stays and gets Delonte exiled, everyone will know it was because of this alleged incident with LeBron's mother and, not only will it add more fuel to the fire, it will give legitimacy to the story.

That's why LeBron should reunite with his good friend Jay-Z and go to the New Jersey Nets. The Nets give LeBron the opportunity to play in New York(albeit a couple years from now). Yes, I know, so do the Knicks, but here's what the Knicks don't have: a top three pick in a decent draft, a good supporting cast, aggressive ownership and the chance for LeBron to pick his own coach. If LeBron goes to the Knicks, he'll have 30 times the pressure to win a title than he did in Cleveland. Knicks fans care about championships. They are also, and I know this is going to get me in trouble, the most fickle fans in the NBA. The longer it takes LeBron to deliver a ring, the more likely fans will turn on him. It happened with Patrick Ewing. It happened with the Yankees and A-Rod. New Yorkers are impatient(Yes, I know, so are New Jerseyians...but that's only during midday traffic).

In New Jersey, he gets a new owner dying to prove himself. He gets Devin Harris and Brook Lopez PLUS whomever the Nets take at #3(be it Wesley Johnson of Syracuse or Derrick Favors of Georgia Tech). The Knicks gave away their lottery pick to Utah and, right now, they only have David Lee as a known commodity. Plus, the Nets have the money to bring in a second big name. Does Lopez-Favors-James-Joe Johnson(or Ray Allen)-Harris sound better to you than Eddy Curry-Lee-James-Joe Johnson(or Ray Allen)-Chris Duhon to you? I thought so. As for the other destinations? Look, if LeBron goes to Miami and wins a ring with D-Wade, the knock will be that he needed Wade to carry him. In New Jersey(or New York), LeBron gets to be his own man. Cleveland had a chance to give that to LeBron and they blew it for seven years. The Clippers? They have a young nucleus, but nothing proven beyond always-fat, always-hurt point guard Baron Davis. Plus, he'd be sharing his home court with Kobe and will be playing for a notoriously cheap owner. So LeBron, start looking for houses in the Garden State and take my advice and stay the hell out of South Orange.

2. Chris Bosh(Current team: Toronto Raptors)

Breakdown: When Bosh was taken 4th overall back in 2003 after just one year at Georgia Tech, "experts" loved his potential but thought he would need a year or two to grow. Turns out they were wrong. Bosh has been an instant double-double machine, has been remarkably healthy and has shown off a KG-like mid-range stroke with his quick left hand. Recently, Bosh gave his list of five teams he'd like to join this summer(Lakers, Raptors, Heat, Knicks and Bulls. Although, the Nets were added later on). As soon as Bosh named L.A., Lakers fans started getting into a tizzy about "Avatar"(meaning Bosh, not the movie) coming to L.A.

Where he SHOULD go: The only way Bosh is going to L.A. is through a sign-and-trade and we've already read this story before. There was talk early in the season of a Andrew Bynum-for-Bosh trade but that eventually simmered and it was believed that it was a rumor floated by Lakers coach Phil Jackson to motivate Bynum. While the Lakers gives Bosh the best chance at a title, it also gives him the worst chance at playing time and touches. In L.A., Bosh would be a third or fourth option behind Kobe Bryant, Pau Gasol, and Ron Artest. Plus, there's the presence of Lamar Odom. Bringing in Bosh would not only be a disservice to Odom and Gasol(as it would be a more expensive, bigger name that requires a decent amount of shots) but it would minimize Bosh's star power. Bosh isn't the type of big man who can carry a team by himself(as seen with his stint in Toronto). He's similar to where Gasol was prior to the Lakers trade out of Memphis: A star-quality big man, who is better served as a number two on a contender.

That's why Bosh should head to Miami and link up with Dwayne Wade. The Heat haven't had a legit big man since Shaq and 'Zo left. If the Raptors can talk the Heat into a sign-and-trade, perhaps a deal for troubled scorer Michael Beasley and guard Mario Chalmers would suffice(and if not, you still have Bosh/Wade/Beasley/Chalmers plus one more)? That would free some space for Miami to re-sign Wade, bring in Bosh and then sign a lower level role player like Mike Miller or Raymond Felton. The Heat are a top five team in the East with just Wade and his bumbling gang of four behind him. Bosh gives them another weapon. I know Bosh wants to wait on LeBron and sign wherever he goes, but what if LeBron somehow goes back to Cleveland? Unlike LeBron, Wade has a ring and has proven he can get to the Promised Land by putting a team on his back. However, like LeBron, Wade can't do it all by himself forever. He needs a sidekick and that's a role Bosh is built for.

3. Dwayne Wade(Current team: Miami Heat)

Breakdown: All "Flash" has done since entering the league in 2003 is win a championship, single-handedly keep Miami basketball alive, and become perhaps the best basketball player in the Eastern Conference. What Wade has managed to do with the Heat is nothing short of breathtaking. He made them a playoff team in his rookie season, then made them a title winner with Shaq a year later. Except, you don't hear much about Wade because all the talk has been about LeBron since the two entered the league. Whether Wade is better than LeBron is another debate for another day, the fact is, he's one of the game's 3 or 4 best players in the league and he's on the market.

Where he SHOULD go: Unless there is someway to orchestrate the Wade-LeBron-Bosh triumvate in New York like some had whispered about, Wade should stay in Miami. Yes, the Heat haven't been as aggressive in building a team around Wade as the Cavs were with LeBron or the Lakers were with Kobe, but at least Wade has the memory of winning a title in Miami to fall back on. Wade knows he's good enough to make the team a dangerous playoff team on his own, but the Celtics series proved that Wade needs some help. Could he find it elsewhere if he can get Bosh or LeBron or Boozer to tag along? Sure, but Wade has too much pride to ride someone else's coattails. He needs to be the alpha dog. In a class this deep, he can find one, whether it be Boozer or Bosh or Amare Stoudemire. He gets to work under one of the game's great minds in team president Pat Riley. Riley knows what is needed to win. You don't have that luxury in some of these other places.

Wade needs to stay and be the face of the franchise but only under the condition that his re-signing is paired with the signing of another big name. If he's willing to take less money to make the Bosh-Wade-LeBron trio work in Miami(far-fetched, but still), then fine. If he's willing to accept a big man like Boozer or Avatar to patrol the paint? Great, but Wade should only come back AFTER he puts pressure on the organization to make some whole sale changes. If he signs early, and the Heat make no other moves, then Flash is stuck without the luxury of having an opt-out clause like he did this season. Wade's managed to be a billboard star without the flashy lights of the Big Apple. He doesn't need the Knicks to make him a phenomenon. He just needs to win and he can do that by finishing what he started in South Beach.

4. Amare Stoudemire: (Current team: Phoenix Suns)

Breakdown: Like Bosh, many thought Amare needed some seasoning going from high school to the pros before he developed into a genuine beast. Like Bosh, they were wrong. Stoudemire has been a monster inside since Day 1. He's also been very unlucky. The Suns couldn't win the big one despite years of having supporting casts that would make LeBron salivate. Shawn Marion, Steve Nash, Joe Johnson, Raja Bell, Boris Diaw....the Suns have had the components to win titles. They just couldn't get over the hump. Over the last couple years, Amare's wore out his welcome and that has resulted in his name being involved in trade talks the last two seasons. The final straw may be his recent no-shows in the Western Conference Finals, where the Suns have been dominated inside by the Lakers. Those lackluster performances have led to reports that Amare's not coming back to the desert this summer....

Where he SHOULD go:......nor should he. While micro-fracture surgery has robbed Amare of being the athletic freak he once was, he's still capable of being a terror on both ends of the court. In Phoenix, he plays in a high-octane offense that is more geared toward scoring than defense(even with Alvin Gentry being more defense-oriented than predecessor Mike D'Antoni). Also, Phoenix has done favors to Amare's ego by letting trade rumors circulate for two seasons without anything being done on that end. The Suns were expected to be rebuilding at the beginning of the season, but shocked the world by being title contenders. That run can't go for much longer. Steve Nash is reaching the twilight of his career and his aching back can only handle so much punishment. Beyond that, even the role players are getting old. Grant Hill is pushing 60. Leandro Barbosa's getting up there. Amare needs to go to a young team where he can be the veteran and be able to show his skills on both offense AND defense.

My pick? The Washington Wizards. Look, teams aren't going to seriously consider Amare until after Carlos Boozer and Chris Bosh are signed. Amare's a Lexus. Boozer's a Mercedes and Bosh is a Ferrari. You're not going to consider buying the Lexus if the Benz and the Ferrari are still on the lot and will only cost a few bucks more than the Lex. When the Wizards won the lottery and the chance at John Wall, they made themselves a bit more attractive to free agents. D.C. is a solid market. Wall is the type of point guard that can make Amare look good. Flip Saunders is a proven coach(three straight Eastern Conference Finals with Detroit prior to coming to Washington). I know Amare's a Florida boy and going back home to the Heat would be a nice homecoming, but is he higher on Miami's priorities than Bosh or Boozer? I don't think so. A Wall-Stoudemire combo could make the Wizards at least a playoff team and make Amare a bigger star and, as the team grows, they become players in the East(After all, if Cleveland loses LeBron, that's one less team at the top of the conference).

5. Carlos Boozer: (Current team: Utah Jazz)

Breakdown: Like Stoudemire, Carlos Boozer has been the subject of trade talk for the last couple of years. The breakout and subsequent big re-signing of fellow forward Paul Millsap made Boozer expendable, but nobody was going to trade for a guy who may jet at the end of the season if things go awry. Now, Boozer's a free agent and he can bring his services as an inside rebounding bully to a contender and the Jazz can launch the Millsap Era in Utah. For all of Boozer's dominance inside, the knock on him is his lack of durability. That might hurt him in the market(especially with Chris Bosh also a free agent), but teams would be crazy to completely write off Boozer because he's a little frail.

Where he SHOULD go: For Cavs fans, Carlos Boozer is "the one that got away". Since Boozer left Cleveland after his rookie contract was up, the Cavs have been relentless in finding a suitable replacement....and they've failed miserably. Antawn Jamison is nice, but he's nowhere near the inside presence that Boozer is. You have to wonder if LeBron is thinking that same thing. Carlos Boozer could have been the sidekick LeBron needed to be a title contender and the front office let him walk.

So why not a reunion? If LeBron signs with New Jersey, as I suggested he should, he should talk the suits into bringing his old buddy Boozer with him. That would allow the Nets to shift their focus to Wesley Johnson in the draft(or trading the pick, if need be) and gives the Nets a ridiculous inside combo with Boozer and Brook Lopez. Like the Knicks, the Nets spent much of the last few years cutting payroll so they can make moves this summer. Right now, they may be lined up for two big signings. Yi Jianlin is a nice outside shooting threat at power forward, but he's not starter-calibur. You bring in Boozer, who's the type of physical banger the Nets haven't had since Derrick Coleman and it frees up Lopez and it gives guys like Devin Harris(or LeBron, if he signs) alot of options. Again, with the Cavs potentially losing LeBron, that's one less team at the top. Could a Lopez-Boozer-LeBron-Wesley Johnson-Harris combo at least be a 6 or 7 seed in the East? Sure, especially with the right coach. Boozer will flirt with Miami and maybe even the Knicks(though I don't think he's a good fit in that offense) but with returning to Utah no longer an option, it should be Boozer(not Bosh) who waits to join LeBron wherever he goes.

6. Joe Johnson(Current team: Atlanta Hawks)

Breakdown: He was left for dead after the Celtics gave up on him being a star and sent to Phoenix. After breaking out with the Suns, he found greener pastures in Atlanta and made the Hawks a contender before too long. After a Eastern semis sweep by Orlando, Joe Johnson may have played his last game for the Hawks. Johnson is a big guard who can run the point, or even play the 3(and maybe some 4 in the right situation). He's like a veteran version of top prospect Evan Turner(though without Turner's upside).

Where he SHOULD go: The Hawks are already paying Mike Bibby and Jamal Crawford and will eventually have to pay Josh Smith and Al Horford. With attendance in the ATL always suspect, you don't know if they can afford to give JJ the money he wants(or keep him for long, if they do pay him). Plus, with Mike Woodson out and new owners coming, there's a new regime coming to town. Johnson doesn't need to be a part of that.

Signing with the Knicks reunites Johnson with his own Phoenix coach Mike D'Antoni. Mike D. knows what Johnson can do and Johnson knows he can excel in that offense. I know Joe Johnson isn't the name Knicks fans were hoping for with the recent salary purge, but you have to be realisitic and realize this Knicks team doesn't have the players to entice a guy like a LeBron James. Bringing in Joe Johnson is a nice start and if you can also bring back a former popular Knicks center by the name of Marcus Camby, then I'd be happy.(The other option, Knicks fans, might be trading for Gilbert Arenas.......) Johnson could be a point forward type or be the scorer. He could also try to team with LeBron somewhere but my bet is LeBron's going to take his time before deciding to leave home or not. Johnson can be a star in New York, and unlike in Atlanta, he won't have to worry about playing in half-filled buildings(although if free agency doesn't go as planned, you wonder if Knick fans will boycott going to the Garden).

So those are this year's Big Six. There are a couple of other notables available this summer. Here's some quick hit thoughts on them:

* I think this summer we wave goodbye to Shaq, AI, and T-Mac. Shaq mentioned returning to L.A. and that very well could happen, but I think Shaq proved this year that his heart's not really in it. If Shaq couldn't get in shape to try and win a ring for LeBron, what makes anyone think he'll be fit to team back up with the man that he couldn't co-exist with in his prime: Kobe Bryant? Iverson could play a couple more years in Philly but, with Evan Turner coming, minutes are going to be hard to come by and you wonder if the Sixers will even want to bring back "The Answer" because of that. As for McGrady, it's time he listens to his body and hangs 'em up. He could probably con the Clippers into overpaying him so he can play 30-40 games a season for them. McGrady isn't washed up. He still can be an elite scorer. It's just his knees have went to mush and, with his style of play, they aren't going to get any better.

*I suggested Marcus Camby go back to the Knicks and I think either New York or a return to Denver makes the most sense. The run in Portland was nice but, with Oden and Przybilla coming back, there's no room for "The Camby Man". Like T-Mac, Camby is always an injury risk and you wonder how much is left in the tank, but guys like Camby will always have a spot in this league because every team can use a shot-blocker/rebounder who isn't a team cancer(just look at Theo Ratliff). Camby isn't going to be a sexy signing for anyone but he may be the move that wins a playoff game or two for a contender and the Nuggets can sure use some more defense after getting humiliated by Utah in the playoffs. Another sleeper choice for Camby? The Oklahoma City Thunder, who need a big man and should have made the trade for Camby this winter anyway.

*The other "big" name is Celtics guard Ray Allen. Allen was almost foolishly shipped to Boston with Celtics savior Rajon Rondo last year and Allen was on the block for most of the first few months. In typical Allen fashion, Ray has heated up during the playoffs as the smell of new money has flared through his nostrils. The man once known as "Jesus Shuttlesworth" has gotten up in years and the C's may be better suited to look elsewhere for a big-time shooter(as they saw with the 'Sheed signing, some people just lose interest when they get old and overpaid). With the team getting older, they can't afford to hog up more cap space with aging talent. If they decide to move on with their starting shooting guard, Allen could look to a team like New Jersey(who desperately need a shooter), Washington(if they can get rid of Arenas), or Phoenix(who can use someone to take the load off Nash).

Starting Lineups: Greatest MC's of All-Time

Even though this was started as a sports blog, we've always found ways to dabble into other areas of entertainment. I wrote a tribute to Michael Jackson last year. Gabe covered the Oscars, and both of us are coming off a piece in this very same weekly feature where we listed movies in desperate need of a remake.

Today, we dabble in music again, this time in the one genre where the two of us share a common ground: Hip-hop. Some will argue that a debate over who's the greatest MC of all time should not be held by a North Jersey Italian and a New York Puerto Rican. To them, we say "Fuck 'em!". So, for the two or three true hip hop fans left in a declining rap economy, we dedicate this piece to you.

DAVE:

9. Redman/Method Man: They were so similar as MC's that it's impossible to put one over the other. Somehow, fate brought together hip-hop's Cheech and Chong to create the greatest two-man wrecking crew since Eric B. & Rakim. Among the pantheon of classic hip hop albums, Redman's "Muddy Waters" and Meth's "Tical" will always rank among my top 5 or 10 favorite albums of all time. Redman deserves credit for putting Jersey hip-hop on the map, along with Queen Latifah and Naughty By Nature. Meth was the best rapper in, at least in my opinion, the greatest rap group of all-time: The Wu-Tang Clan. Their collaborative album, "Blackout", was every bit as great as fans anticipated. Inevitably, they got involved in movies and came back to a hip-hop generation more concerned with snappin' and poppin' and ringtone jingles, but even today, Red and Meth are better than nearly any new jack you can name.

8. Canibus: In sports, we talk about guys having a high "basketball IQ" or "football IQ". Canibus had a high rhyme IQ. YouTube any old Canibus freestyle or find an old cassette with some old Canibus joints on it and you will be amazed. His wordplay, delivery, flow were all mind-blowing. "2nd Round KO", the diss track that 'Bus unleashed on LL Cool J, is(to me, at least) second only to Nas' Ether in terms of the greatest diss tracks of all time. Many gave LL the W, but I think that's more mainstream hype than actual fact. Canibus' career may be long over as, even with all his skill, he could never sell records but there will probably never be a lyricist as nice as the man once regarded as "The Next Rakim".

7. Nas: How is the responsible for the greatest diss track of all-time and the winner of one of the most publicized rap battles this far down the list? Well, for all of Nas' greatness, he's wildly inconsistent. He followed up his first two solid albums("Illmatic" and "It Was Written") with a piss-poor Firm album and two even more intolerable LPs("I Am" and "Nastradamus"). It's hard to put a rapper as great as Nas too high when he has "Oochie Wally" and "Owe Me Back" to his credit. Nas came back out of rap's death trap by humiliating Jay-Z by dropping the song "Ether" on the remarkable comeback album, "Stillmatic". But even after following "Stillmatic" up with another great album, "God's Son", Nas dropped "Street's Disciple", which some people liked and some people didn't. "Hip Hop Is Dead" and "Untitled" were great bounce back albums that showed the old vintage Nas and all signs point to his latest album with Damien Marley being another smash. So yeah, Nas SHOULD probably be higher, but Nas is as responsible for his great hits as he is for his epic misses.

6. Eminem: White people everywhere owe their newfound hipness to Slim Shady. He managed to pull off the seemingly impossible task of erasing the "Vanilla Ice" stigma from all white rappers and helped bring hip-hop to the suburbs and the mainstream.....and that's where my problem with Mr. Mathers lies. Don't get me wrong, I love Eminem. I love his music. I love his balls-to-the-wall approach to address any subject matter, anytime. What I don't love is the millions of suburban white kids in sagging pants and sideways caps who think they know hip hop because they just bought that new Soulja Boy. Em's mainstream success brought hip-hop to a higher level and broadened its horizons and, if today's music is any indication, it was obviously a mistake. Hip-hop was always meant to be underground because, as proven with bums like Soulja Boy or Jibbs or any other half-assed commercial rapper, the genre was going to suffer when it put in the wrong hands.

When MTV tried to jump back on the rap bandwagon after leaving it for dead on the sidewalk years before Em's debut, it ushered in a new wave of guys who didn't have much talent but had the ability to make pop-friendly records. MTV wanted no part of the Jadakisses or Talib Kwelis, they just wanted to put a backwards Yankee cap on Fred Durst and call it rap-rock so white kids could eat it up. Now, Em isn't a flash in a pan commercial pop rapper like so many of his brethren collecting a check today and certainly, he didn't intentionally put hip-hop in the state it's in, but his success helped cause this. Still, the fact that Eminem managed to have ANY success is an incredible feat on its own. He managed to give downtrodden white kids, who couldn't relate to the "slingin' rocks and guns shots" of gangsta rap a voice. He went against the grain and made commercially-acceptable music that even hardcore hip hop heads could listen to. He did things HIS way and, eventhough he's dropped two subpar albums the last two times out, there is still nobody who can touch Slim Shady when he's on his A-Game.

5. Rakim: To fans of true hip hop, Rakim is as respected of a name as any in the game. He, along with guys like Big Daddy Kane, KRS-One, and Kool Moe Dee, defined '80's hip-hop. His tag-teaming with Eric B. set the game on its ear and even now, as new fans have either forgotten him or never heard of him, he's dropping albums that have more depth than most of hip-hop's new class. For all the alleged new hip-hop heads who swear by Drake or think Lil Wayne is the greatest rapper of all-time, I defy you to put any of their albums against "Paid in Full".

4. 2Pac: I couldn't in good conscience put Em and Rakim ahead of 'Pac. Eventhough I was never a HUGE 'Pac fan(yes, I know, blasphemy. Sue me), and eventhough his life was cut short just as his career was about to hit its peak, you have to give credit where credit is due. 2Pac rejuvenated an entire coast after the West went dormant after the N.W.A. breakup. 'Pac not only made party records like "I Get Around" or "California Love", he was able to flex his poetic ability and touch on social issues with "Brenda's Got A Baby", "Changes", "Dear Mama" and "Keep Ya Head Up". For all of 'Pac's soft side, he was as fiery as they come. Never one to back down, he threw the first sucker punch in the media-inspired East Coast-West Coast rivalry with "Hit 'Em Up", an all-out assault on the Notorious B.I.G. and Bad Boy Records. Had 'Pac lived to see the whole beef with Biggie through, we might have gotten more of a grasp as to where his place in hip-hop history stands. For now, he's a legend with a vast cult following whose memory will never go away, even as the genre he helped keep alive slowly dwindles to nothing.

3. Jay-Z: He started out as a rapper and became an entrepreneur. Jay-Z has become the ultimate mix of street hustler and buttoned-up business man. He's more than just a recording artist now. He's a brand name. He's an entity. He owns part of the New Jersey Nets. He once ran Def Jam, the holy grail of hip hop labels. He's made classic album after classic album("Reasonable Doubt", "Hard Knock Life", "The Blueprint".....you know what, if I have to name them for you, you shouldn't be reading the list). My issue with Hova, and the real reason he's not at the top of this list, is three things. One, for a man who claims to keep all of his rhymes in his head and doesn't write anything down, far too many of his "freestyles" I've managed to hear on songs either before or after the initial freestyle. Second, far too many of Biggie's rhymes come out the man's mouth. I know he's paying tribute to his mentor but there comes a time where you have to say, enough's enough. Maybe that's being petty, but I don't care. To me, you can't call yourself the greatest rapper of all time if you're constantly biting from someone else. Third, and perhaps the most important, Jay-Z got absolutely destroyed by Nas. You'd be a fool to try to argue the other way around. The only reason Jay is up higher than Nas is that he doesn't have Nas' fatal flaw of laying eggs when it comes to dropping albums. Of the 11 albums, Jay-Z's put out, I disliked only 1 of them(His "comeback from retirement" record, Kingdom Come). Jay-Z has always been remarkably consistent. He's managed to stay relevant in a time where rappers of his age and ilk are being thrown by the waist side and replaced with more media-friendly acts. He's just a great rapper who will never go away and now, with all his success from other business endeavors, he's not only a player in the rap game but a player in the business world and a name at the end of the lips of guys who no longer associate him with rap music.

2. KRS-One: If you're going to write me hate mail because I have Mr. Parker ahead of Jigga and 'Pac, save your breath. Without KRS-One, there's be no 2Pac. There'd be no Jay-Z. There'd be Biggie or anyone else(save for maybe Rakim) on this list. KRS-One isn't the founder of hip-hop but he might as well be. His face should be permanently entrenched on the Mount Rushmore of Hip Hop. He helped bring hip-hop from disco clubs and street corner sound systems to something a bit more mainstream. His live show is the stuff of legends. Go pay $200 and try to find someone who moves a crowd STILL like "The Blastmaster". You will lose. He emerged victorious from his legendary battle with MC Shan, dropping the classic "The Bridge Is Over". He did hip-hop a huge favor and dismantled Nelly, eventhough Nelly continued to sell records after Kris dropped "Ova Here". He's a living legend. He's the teacher. Some rappers are iconic. KRS-One is an institution. His significance to this genre goes past just a verse or his run with BDP or "The Temple of Hip-Hop". It's about how his impact opened the door for so many legends that came after him.

1. Notorious B.I.G.: His first two albums(and really the only two albums he's responsible for before his death), "Ready To Die" and "Life After Death", are as good if not better than ANY two albums you want to put out there. Biggie's the classic example, much like 'Pac, of a great career that ended before it could ever really start, so it says a lot that he managed to have such a profound impact off of essentially two full-length albums. He was, in every aspect, a complete MC. His flow was incredible. His wordplay was ridiculous. The way he subliminally ripped Nas a new one on "Kick In The Door" was crazy. He resuscitated New York hip hop and, along with the Wu-Tang Clan, gave the East Coast something 2Pac and Death Row and the guys on the West Coast had to compete with. His early death not only robbed us of what would have been a ground-breaking career but also the chance to see two of the greats battle it out in a legit battle between him and 2Pac. On this list, we talked about guys making wack records, I've never even heard BIG make a wack verse. EVER. To me, that alone makes him the greatest rapper of all-time.

Gabe:

9. Chuck D - What makes someone the greatest MC? Sometimes it's the written rhyme. Sometimes it's freestyling. Sometimes it's crossing over into other arenas like acting, producing, business, etc. Sometimes, like in the case of Chuck D, it is inventing, and still being the best at, a sub-genre of hip-hop. He essentially created political rap. There were guys before him that were socially conscious, but never with the strength and in-your-face attitude that Chuck had. He was bold. He was outspoken. He wasn't remaking "The Message." Also, make no mistake, this all about Chuck D. Flavor Flav was simply a hype man. Chuck was the creative force and leader of Public Enemy.

8. Jay-Z - I'm putting Jay-Z on my list because not only is he a great MC, but he is also the greatest businessman in hip-hop history. His early music is incredible. His entrepreneurial successes are well documented, Roc-A-Fella, Def Jam, etc. Although I think his music fallen off recently (Dave and I go in circles about "Empire State of Mind"), even now, when he is on, he is better than most out there. "D.O.A." is such an intelligent song. The beat and music are complex. The song is a unashamed indictment of the state of current rap. It makes you wish the people he was attacking would make better music, or at least recognize the song is about them.

7. KRS-One - Like Dave said, KRS-One is a teacher and a living legend. He was relevant and innovative over 20 years ago and he still is today. He appears on tracks these days and is as good or better than anyone he appears with. His live shows are legendary. And above all else he is one of the most intelligent and eloquent rappers in the game.

6. J-Live - J-Live is on this list because of his lyrics. He is one of the smartest people in hip-hop. His metaphors and wordplay are second to none. Listen to the track "Firewater" in which he likens his flow to alcohol and carries the metaphor throughout the entire song. He is also a producer and DJ who creates his own beats. He is a triple threat, and even calls his company 3TP, as in Triple Threat Productions. Part of the reason he is not higher on my list is his thematic elements. He is constantly rhyming about how much is underground and how he isn't popular but is better than the guys on the radio. That shtick gets old after a few albums. Also, since his early work and the track "Them That's Not" he hasn't really cracked the mainstream, and there is something to be said for being able to make complex, intelligent, yet still accessible music. More on that later.

5. Eminem - The obvious? He's the greatest and most important white rapper ever. He makes you forget color. The not-so-obvious? He is a brilliant storyteller. His lyrical strength is not in wordplay, but in constructing a narrative. Think about songs like "Guilty Conscience," "Lose Yourself," and the best example "Stan." After hearing "Stan," SNL's Lorne Michaels said, "I don't know rap, but I know writing, and that's good writing." His imagery may be gruesome and violent but no one pulls you through a story, from opening to conflict to climax to ending, like Mr. Mathers.

4. Tupac - Call him the greatest utility infielder in hip-hop history. Pac could do everything. He made songs you could dance to. He made songs that made you think about social issues. He made heartfelt songs, like "Dear Mama." His songs covered every subject imaginable. He probably wasn't the best at any single aspect of hip-hop, but he was great, and better than most, at all of them. On a personal note, with the exception of my no. 1, he is the only person on this list that if you asked for my favorite lyric of theirs, I would have an immediate answer. The opening lines from "Troublesome '96"....."Menacin' methods label me a lethal weapon/Makin' n****s die witnessin' breathless imperfection."

3. Mos Def - In my humble opinion he is best actor of the great rappers. From his days in Black Star to this year, when he dropped The Ecstatic, he has consistently made great music. Black On Both Sides and The Ecstatic are amazing. He is the lead on the greatest hip-hop song ever written, "Respiration." He has branched out into other genres of music, like rock with his band Black Jack Johnson. He is smart, socially conscious, and funny. And the thing I like the most might be his flow. He has the smoothest delivery of anyone not named Method Man. Also, remember what I said about being intelligent and cracking the mainstream? Mos is an example of how to do that right.

2. Rakim - I am putting Rakim this high because of how long he has been doing what he does. Unlike most rappers from the early days, KRS-One included, all of his stuff sounds like it could be released today. He was way ahead of his time. He has influenced countless other great rappers. And trust me, listen to "Follow The Leader." It still holds up.

1. Black Thought - To me this is simple. The best is obvious. And, this is my list. I think Thought is the greatest written rhymer out there. Songs like "Proceed," "Step Into The Realm," "The Next Movement," and "Don't Feel Right" show this. He is also one of the best freestyle artists ever. Tracks like "Thought @Work" and "Web" could be packaged together in a textbook titled "Lessons To A Young Freestyler." They are basically freestyles set to music and put on wax. On top of all of this he fronts the most genre bending groups in hip-hop, The Roots, the first hip-hop band if you will. They were the first to have live instruments, not a DJ, on stage backing their frontmen. His lyrics and their music are the most creative in hip-hop.

That's it, that's the list. Boom (another Roots song). Roasted.

Cut His Mic Off Award: 5/21/2010

"It's like an extra year with your girlfriend trying to map things out. You know, these quarterbacks, they're like my girlfriend. No homo. " - Kansas City Chiefs WR Dwayne Bowe, discussing the "relationship" between him and QB Matt Cassell

I'll have to admit that, in a sports media world dominated by crotchety old men who are both deficient in their knowledge of urban lingo and always itching for a story to blow out of proportion during the offseason, that Dwayne Bowe using the phrase "no homo" hasn't become a bigger deal. For those not in the know, "no homo" is a phrase used mainly by rappers(most notably and ironically, Cam'ron, who went through an entire phase where he did music videos in pink chinchilla fur coats while driving a pink Escalade), urban youth and the type of surburban kids that normally evoke the popular Dave and Gabe phrase "fucking white people", to clarify their manhood and heterosexuality in the event of making a comment that may be taken as homo-curious(You know, because you don't want to be seen as a potentially gay gangsta rapper when you're dancing in your pink fur coat and making nursery rhymes about jewelry).

My issue with Bowe's comment is not the use of the term "no homo". In fact, I tend to concur with the statement of New York rapping legend Jadakiss on the subject when he said "a real man shouldn't have to say 'no homo'". My problem is the timing. Earlier this week, Bowe made headlines by completely throwing his teammates under the bus and giving us a look into the world of "importing". Clearly, Bowe did not follow the famous quote: "Better to be silent and be thought a fool than open your mouth and leave no doubt." Once you've made an ass out of yourself(not to mention out yourself as a snitch by yapping to a magazine reporter about the potential philandering of married teammates), it's best to keep your mouth shut until things die down. From all accounts of both stories, Bowe's "no homo" came within an hour of news breaking out of Bowe's "importing" story. Keep in mind, these quotes come from a guy who was a holdout as a rookie, and spent most of last season in head coach Todd Haley's doghouse(to the point where he was nearly traded midseason). This isn't exactly how you win over your brothers in arms, Dwayne.

As for the inevitable reaction to "no homo", if the media's treatment of Allen Iverson is any indication, tragically unhip columnists are going to always be against anything that combines sports and urban culture. Much like many got on their high horse about Brian Cushing and his positive steroid test, don't be surprised if some writers suddenly become gay rights advocates over the next few days. Again, it's a slow offseason. The NFL Draft is over. All the big time free agents are signed and we're at least two months from Favre Watch 2010 begins.

That brings me back to my initial point about this being ill-timed. With radio jocks and sportswriters looking for reasons to fill up space, the easiest way for them to do so is for a public figure with an addiction to microphones to go spouting off nonsense. I'm sure Bowe wasn't trying to offend gay people and I know people familiar with the term will just shrug it off as people overreacting(If anyone should be offended, it should be Cassell. No dude wants to be referred to as another man's "girlfriend", even if it was supposed to be metaphorically), but when you're a professional athlete, you have to be mindful of your audience. Bowe was doing a radio interview on a Kansas City radio station, not presenting at The Source Awards.

Word on the street is that Haley sat down with Bowe and had a heart-to-heart(which, if Haley's temperament tells us anything, probably boiled down to him telling Bowe to just shut the fuck up), and the two are probably going to do their best PR spin over the next few months while they wait for the attention from this week's version of VH1 Storytellers with Dwayne Bowe goes away.

In an effort to help matters toward that effect, we're cutting D-Bowe's mic off.

Milk Carton All-Star of the Week

When the Los Angeles Clippers won the NBA Draft lottery around this time last year, we here at BoomRoastedSports honored them by handing out the Milk Carton All-Star of the Week to their former #1 overall pick Michael Olowakandi. This year is going to be no different. With the Wizards now officially on the clock for next month's Draft, we thought we would follow suit and honor one of their former illustrious picks. Really, there was only one choice.

In the history of the NBA, Kwame Brown may be one of the sport's greatest "What ifs?". What if Brown went to college instead of going pro out of high school? What if he had more time to mature instead of being badgered by Michael Jordan during Jordan's second NBA comeback? What if he was never sent to Memphis in the biggest trade farce in recent memory?

As a much-publicized gambler, Jordan rolled the dice on a 6'11 kid out of Georgia' Glynn Academy and took Kwame Brown with the #1 overall pick in the 2001 NBA Draft, making Brown the first high schooler to ever go #1. As if the pressure of being a #1 overall pick and being touted as "The Next Kevin Garnett" wasn't bad enough, Brown was about to be saddled with the luxury of being teammates with one of the sport's fierciest competitors as well as one of its most impatient leaders. Brown struggled out of the gate in Washington, averaging 4.5 points and 3 rebounds, and constantly felt His Airness breathing down his neck. Year 2 saw some improvement, averaging 7 and 5. In his third season and first without Jordan on the roster, Brown had his best season as a pro(coincidence? I don't think so). Brown averaged nearly 11 points and 8 boards a game, and had a career night against Sacramento, going for 30 points and 19 rebounds.

However, as with many young kids with fame and fortune tossed their way early, Brown suffered from immaturity. He feuded with teammates(most notably Gilbert Arenas, who himself is a bit prickly to say the least), coaches and fans. After he rejected a 5-year, $30 million extension, Brown regressed in his fourth season, averaging just 7 points per game. Later that year, he was dealt to the Lakers for Caron Butler and Chucky Atkins where he would be now paired with Jordan's equally impatient clone, Kobe Bryant. Brown averaged 7 points and 6 boards with the Lakers, starting 49 games in place of injured fellow draft bust Chris Mihm. Playing time became a bit more scarce once the Lakers started working another high school lottery pick, center Andrew Bynum. In 2006, Bynum's second season and Brown's sixth, Brown played in just 41 games thanks to injury, averaging just over 8 points a game.

With Bynum coming along, Brown was becoming expendable in Laker Land and he was dealt to Memphis in one of the most lopsided trades in NBA history. The Lakers fleeced the Grizzlies, sending Brown, the retiring Aaron McKie, combo guard Javaris Crittendon, two first round picks and the draft rights to Marc Gasol to Memphis for Marc's All-Star brother, Pau. Pau's presence instantly made the Lakers a dynasty, as they now stand two wins away from making their third straight Finals appearence since acquiring Gasol(they went 1-1 in the previous two Finals). Brown, on the other hand, continued to flounder. In 15 games with the Grizz(starting only one), Brown average just over three points per game to go along with his five rebounds. The next season, Brown signed with Detroit, where he's played the last two seasons, never averaging more than four points per game.

Brown's a free agent now and, at 28, he may still be salvageable, but it's safe to say that all the "Next KG" hype has now dissipated. Brown will get league minimum money from somebody looking for a big body to sacrifice six fouls late in a game but, much like many from the '01 class, Brown was a huge and overwhelming bust.

So let's give it up for the kid who was supposed to be the next Big Ticket but turned into the next Pervis Ellison.......Kwame Brown, everybody!

Winners and Losers of the 2010 NBA Draft Lottery

The city that already hosts The White House, The Washington Monument and The Lincoln Memorial now gets to add "The Great Wall" to the list of D.C. landmarks. The Washington Wizards, after a season that saw their overpriced point guard get suspended and their two other cornerstone sent away for below market price, won the top overall pick in tonight's NBA Draft lottery. They highlight tonight's winners and losers.

WINNERS

1. Washington Wizards: It was probably a bittersweet moment for Wizards fans when the announcement came that their team will be picking first in next month's Draft. After all, this was a team that was thought to be a playoff contender before the season started. It was a team that featured a Big Three of Gilbert Arenas, Antawn Jamison and Caron Butler. It was a team of promise. Now, it's a disaster zone. Jamison and Butler were sent away in one-sided give-away deals and you have to figure Arenas, suspended for foolishly bringing guns into an NBA locker room, is going to be the next one to go. Still, the Wizards get a new franchise face in likely #1 pick John Wall, the heralded point guard out of Kentucky. Also, with all the money jettisoned in the Butler/Jamison deals, the Wiz may be players(not exactly in the LeBron sweepstakes, but still) in one of the most star-studded free agent classes in years. The presence of Wall may entice somebody to take Washington's money. While it's a long shot to expect Dwayne Wade, Chris Bosh or LeBron James to come to the nation's capital, maybe the Wiz get lucky and talk a Carlos Boozer or Amare Stoudemire into pairing with Wall. It may be improbable, but the odds are a little better than they were 24 hours ago.

2. Philadelphia 76ers: All the hype surrounding Wall has dwarfed the fact that Philly, sitting at #2, could end up with the better prospect in National Player of the Year Evan Turner. The distance between Turner and Wall is so minuscule, it's not even worth mentioning. In fact, there are many who believe Turner is the best prospect in this Draft. With the Sixers picking 2nd, they'll let Washington make their decision for him. The hope is that Wall goes first, and the versatile, rangy 6'7 Turner slips to 2. With the Sixers taking Jrue Holiday last year to be their point guard of the future, there might not be as much of a need for Wall as there is for Turner. If Washington somehow takes Turner, the Sixers could always auction off the pick and try to nab a king's ransom(although I'd call that unlikely). Adding Turner to a team that already has athletic forwards Andre Iguodala, Marreese Speights, Thaddeus Young and Elton Brand as well as young guards Holiday and Lou Williams transforms the Sixers from bottom of the barrel in the East to playoff contender.

3. Minnesota Timberwolves: Sure, they dropped further than they were slotted to go but they saved themselves the embarrassment of taking home the top pick. Could you imagine the fiasco if Minnesota had to pass on John Wall because they foolishly drafted point guards Jonny Flynn and Ricky Rubio last year? The way the draft is shaping up, the T'Wolves could nab Syracuse small forward Wesley Johnson at #4. Johnson's an athletic forward in the Shawn Marion mold with a huge wingspan. He's the type of athletic wing player that would fit in nicely with Flynn(or Rubio, if he ever comes to Minnesota). The Timberwolves are talking about moving up to nab Wall or Turner and you wonder if they'll finally decide to dangle Rubio as trade bait, but I can't see Washington passing up a chance at Wall to roll the dice on a guy who may not even come to the States this year(Then again, these are the Wizards).


LOSERS

1. New Jersey Nets: I've always been a fan of the lottery because it keeps teams honest from tanking for elite college prospects. However, you have to feel bad for the Nets. There was no question this was the worst team in basketball last year, even with rising stars Devin Harris, Chris Douglas-Roberts and Brook Lopez. With the Nets under new ownership and eventually moving to the bright lights of Brooklyn, the team needed a fresh face to be its poster child. Instead, the team with the best shot at the top pick gets to pick third in a draft that has two franchise players. Georgia Tech freshman power forward Derrick Favors may be a solid prospect and the type of banger that will complement Lopez for years to come, but he isn't putting butts in seats and he isn't grabbing the interest of the man Nets fans were waiting years to come to the Meadowlands: LeBron James. Assuming Favors is the pick at 3, the Nets now have to hope that the potential move to New York and the presence of partial owner Jay-Z can lure a guy like King James or someone of elite status to come to the Nets. Wall might have gotten James' attention. Favors? Probably not. You had to expect the Nets weren't getting the top pick once they finished with the NBA's worst record. After all, the worst team hasn't gotten the top pick since the Magic took Dwight Howard in 2004. Still, a team that got no breaks their way all last year needed this one badly and, instead, watched their shot at a dynasty bounce off the rim.

2. Los Angeles Clippers: They weren't going to pick in the top two anyway unless they got Blazers in '07 or Rockets in '02 lucky, but the Clippers, much like the Nets, were hoping to get a bounce their way from the lottery gods in an attempt to lure LeBron James to the West Coast. Instead, they'll have to settle for a guy like Kentucky headcase DeMarcus Cousins or lone UNC bright spot Ed Davis to add to their stable of talented youngsters. LeBron was a long shot to join the Clippers anyway. After all, owner Donald Sterling is a racist cheapskate and an elite star of LeBron's magnitude is not going to want to share the same building with Kobe Bryant while playing for a team that seems to have the hardwood version of the Madden Curse. Still, it would have been fun to see what the Clippers would have done with a top-3/top-5 pick in a deep draft and see the kind of measures Sterling would go to to try to convince LeBron or Dwayne Wade or Chris Bosh to come to Hollywood. Instead, they'll have to welcome another uncertain prospect and hope that Blake Griffin's busted knee was just an aberration.

3. John Wall: As bad as the Nets were last year, at least they had a young nucleus around them. They also had the scant hope that LeBron James or another top level free agent would sign with them. There was also the allure of possibly playing in New York when the Nets go to Brooklyn. Instead, "The Great Wall" gets to be city mates with President Obama and be the face of a franchise that just sold off its best assets for half price. Wall will take over a team that features two of the NBA's biggest nutjobs in small forward Josh Howard and waiting-to-be-reinstated point guard Gilbert Arenas. You have to think the Wizards will do whatever it takes to keep a toxic knucklehead like Agent Zero from poisoning their new cornerstone, but Arenas' ridiculous contract is harder to move than JaMarcus Russell in a line at Golden Corral. Howard's the same deal, even if he does have an expiring contract. Even if the Wizards COULD move Arenas and Howard, that leaves Wall to carry a Wizards team with absolutely no talent around him(unless, of course, they make a few big signings or trades). If you're a Wizards fan, you have to wonder, as bad as last season was, was it worth giving away Jamison and Butler now that you know that the faint dream of John Wall coming to town has come to fruition?

Starting Lineups: Movies That Should Be Remade

With originality at an all-time low, movie studios are constantly green-lighting new generation remakes of age-old classics. We've already seen remakes of Clash of the Titans, Alice in Wonderland, Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, and tonight will be the opening of the new Robin Hood movie starring Russell Crowe(as well as another "Karate Kid" movie with Will Smith's coming....unfortunately). We've seen classic TV shows find newfound relevance on the big screen like Transformers, The question is: Are these the right movies to be re-made and are there other more deserving candidates that should be freshened up for the nation's youth?

Consider that question answered today by your friends here at BoomRoastedSports. In this week's Starting Lineup, Gabe and I will rank the nine movies most desperately in need of a remake.

DAVE

9. Super Mario Brothers (Original release: 1993) - If you ask any video game fan, they will tell there is no denying this indisputable fact: The Super Mario Brothers movie was a huge steaming turd. The problem wasn't necessarily that it was a re-telling of a video game as much as it was a re-telling of a video game using real-life people. Mario is a character whose story is best retold animated. Movies made out of video games always tend not to represent fully the awesomeness of the game it was based on. Resident Evil failed. So did Bloodrayne, Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat and Max Payne. You can't expect a movie about a video game to be taken serious with Dennis Hopper rocking a turtle shell. With so many movies moving to 3D and with video games(especially Nintendo's products) being at its peak in popularity, you can make an animated Mario movie(based on the first game or tying in all of the games into one big plot) work in this generation. As for the voices? So long as you don't dial up Bob Hoskins again, I'm fine with whoever you can come up with.

8. The Glass Menagerie (Original release: There's been plenty, the most recent being in 1987 but the most notable being the Katherine Hepburn/Sam Waterson version in 1973) - Some plays that turned into movies just can't be touched. Streetcar Named Desire with Marlon Brando being one of them. The Glass Menagerie , on the other hand, could definitely be redone. The story of mother trying to find a suitor for her shy daughter, much to the chagrin of her surly son is something that can reel in audiences. People are suckers for cheesy love stories and the Twilight saga has proven that they don't even have to be good for them to sell. For the role of Tom, how about Garrett Hedlund(who played the youngest Mercer brother Jack in Four Brothers)? The shy daughter can be done by Amanda Seyfried(Mamma Mia) or Anne Hathaway(Brokeback Mountian). The mother? Perhaps Sally Field(Forest Gump). As for Jim O'Conner, the gentleman caller, I suppose you can use any meathead dreamboat like, say Justin Timberlake, to get the girls all excited.

7. Beverly Hills Cop (Original release: The original BHC was 1984, but the third and most recent one came about 10 years after that) - Some people believe Beverly Hills Cop belongs on the list with Scarface, The Godfather, and Rocky of "Movies That Should Not Be Touched". After all, Eddie Murphy IS Axel Foley. Given his stretch of terrible script choices, it may be his most recognizable role to guys like myself and Gabe(those younger than us would say "Donkey" in the Shrek series). However, did we think anyone could out-do Jack Nicholson as "The Joker" before Heath Ledger did it? Eddie Murphy has done so many bad movies(Daddy Day Care, Pluto Nash, Meet Dave, Imagine That) that most people forget both how great the original Beverly Hills Cop was AND how great Murphy was in it. Still, do you think it's impossible that Jamie Foxx or Dave Chappelle could step into Murphy's huge shoes as Axel Foley and be at least half way decent? Now, there's talks that there will be a fourth B.H.C. with Murphy in it in 2012 but, for right now, that's hearsay. Even if there IS going to be a fourth installment, why not have a guy like Foxx or Chappelle or another young black comedian in there as well to pass the torch?

6. RoboCop (Original release: 1987) In the 80's and 90's, America had tons of action-hero bad asses: John McClain(Die Hard series), John Rambo(Rambo series), Rocky Balboa(Rocky series), Terminator....hell, even Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal put out somewhat watchable action movies(at least, watchable for THAT era) back then. Now? Kids are dressed like Yu Gi Oh characters or dressing like vampires to be like the Twilight geeks. There's no quintessential character that kids and adults will pay to watch wreck shop. There's no RoboCop. The old RoboCop was a victim of late-80's special effects limitations and eventually fell victim to oversaturation once the 3rd movie came out in '93. It's been 17 years since then and special effects are far and away more advanced than when Peter Weller was Alex Murphy. A new RoboCop could draw with both older folks familiar with the original and a younger generation thirsting to watch things get blown up. Since the suit does most of the work, Weller's heir doesn't have to be some puffed-up musclehead like John Cena or Brock Lesnar. How about Daniel Craig, who did a fine job taking over the James Bond mantle over the last few years? You could have Craig initially as a victim of an act of terrorism and then reborn as the new RoboCop sent overseas to tear shit up. It would be like a less comic-nerdy Iron Man.

5. Mad Max (Original: 1979, with sequels in '81 and '85)- Keeping with the "America Lacks A Bad Ass" theme, I give you Mad Max. There aren't many characters in today's movies that equal the awesomeness of Mel Gibson's portrayal back in the late-70's/early-80's. Hollywood loves to recycle the "cop with a personal vendetta" angle. Hell, even Gibson himself tried to go to that well again with Edge of Darkness. That movie, of course, epically failed, mainly because Mel Gibson has become more of a washed-up, Jew-hating drunk than a wise-cracking ass-kicker. Young people don't realize this is the same guy who was Martin Riggs and William Wallace. To them, he's the dick who made Apocolypto. That's why the remake can be filled by someone with a reputation for being more of a tough guy. My wife suggested Clive Owen(Inside Man, King Arthur) or Gerard Butler. Another nominee was Mark Wahlberg. Wahlberg may have failed as video game cop Max Payne, but he was solid in The Departed and in Four Brothers. Butler was cunning in Law Abiding Citizen and a warrior in 300. Both have the acting chops and the build to play Max.

4. Short Circuit (Original release 1986, sequel 1988) - You can make the case that there's already been a remake of the original Short Circuit in the much better sequel, Short Circuit II. Still, people who remember the Short Circuit movies certainly wouldn't mind an updated version of the wise-cracking robot. With the advent of the internet and the rise of social networking, not to mention the myriad of other technological advancements, you can definitely make a Short Circuit remake intriguing to fans of the original as well as interesting to young kids who will probably mistake Johnny 5 for Wall-E. My only demand? No Steve Guttenberg. You can talk me into an Ally Sheedy return, but Gutts is a no-no.

3. Any Kevin Costner movie except for JFK - Movie nuts, sports fans in particular, tend to overrate the entertainment value of Costner's films. Yes, Bull Durham and Field of Dreams were classics, but is Costner irreplaceable in those roles? Could you not sub Costner out in Field of Dreams for, say, Tom Cruise or Jon Cusack? Costner gets alot of credit for being in a couple of classic movies(like Field of Dreams and Bull Durham, as well as Tin Cup and Dances with Wolves), but lest we forget, this is the same guy who gave us Waterworld, The Postman, and Swing Vote. There's a reason why Costner's movies tanked after the 80's....people realized he was as cultivating as Al Gore. Costner's celebrity was built around great supporting casts and solid scripts. He's the Brian Billick of actors: a man who gets all of the fame for the performances of others. I excluded JFK because, as unbearable as Costner is at times as Jim Garrison, I couldn't put anyone else in that spot like I could with other movies. You can put Matthew McConaghey in Costner's place in Tin Cup. You can cast Cusak or Cruise in his baseball classics. JFK? I'm not saying a replacement is impossible(because any actor with at least a decent amount of acting chops could top Costner) but it would be hard to get Costner's image out of that movie.

2. Daredevil/Ghost Rider/Elektra/Cat Woman (Original releases: 2003, 2005, 2007, 2004...respectively) - Christopher Nolan's resurrection of Batman in Batman Begins and The Dark Knight after The Caped Crusader franchise was buried by horrid flicks like Batman and Robin and Batman Forever proves that you can salvage a bomb if it's in the right hands. The four comic book movies, while based around less popular characters, could have been better if they weren't rushed in an effort to eat off the popularity of the Spiderman and X-Men movies. The problem with Daredevil and Ghost Rider is that the lead roles were given to terrible actors(Ben Affleck for Daredevil and Nic Cage for Ghost Rider). Look at what happened with The Incredible Hulk when they swapped out Eric Bana for Edward Norton. You put a legit actor in a lead role, even if it's based around a frilly comic book plot, and you can make a solid movie out of it. Nobody's buying Ben Affleck as some ass-kicking hard ass. They barely buy him as a B-level actor. The same for Cage, whose post-Leaving Las Vegas career has been Eddie Murphy-esque.

Catwoman was a movie that should have just never been made. Nobody cared that much about Michelle Pfieffer doing the same role in the Batman Returns, and she did a way better job with the role than Halle Berry. Elektra is sort of the same deal. Just because comic book movies are popular doesn't mean fans will run out to see a Marvel movie based on anyone(which Marvel will find out when Thor comes out). A movie like Ghost Rider is going to be driven mostly by special effects....but that doesn't mean you just put a shitty actor in their for the rare speaking parts. As for who would play Ghost Rider? I don't know. I always thought Michael Madsen was enough of a hard ass to play the role, but he suffers from the same acting deficiency that Cage suffers from. I wouldn't mind Daredevil being redone with Affleck's much more talented butt-buddy Matt Damon. Elektra could sub out Jennifer Garner for Megan Fox(Transformers) or Amy Adams(Enchanted) and Catwoman can just cease to exist, but if need be, can use someone like Zoe Saldana(Avatar).

1.The Breakfast Club (Original release: 1985) - The Breakfast Club probably deserves to be on the Untouchable list, but what better way to remember the late John Hughes than with a classy redux of perhaps his best piece of work. The success of the High School Musical movies and Glee proves people still get up for cheesy afternoon specials turned into merchandise-selling phenomenons. That doesn't mean we replace Emilio Estevez with Zac Efron. The new Breakfast Club deserves a worthy cast. The only consensus no-brainer I've gotten in terms of the new cast is Juno's Ellen Page playing eccentric Allison(played originally by Ally Sheedy). Initially, I liked Scarlett Johannson for "Claire" but she's become movie napalm over the years so I've settled in on Blake Lively(Gossip Girl). Chris Evans(Fantasic Four, Not Another Teen Movie) could play Emilio Estevez's character, Andrew, as he can't be any worse as a boring jock than Estevez was. For geeky Brian, played by Anthony Michael Hall, how about Michael Cera in a Juno reunion with Page? Somebody pitched the idea of Judd Nelson's John Bender being played by Johnny Depp but Depp is too much of a weirdo to play a tough guy role. Instead, how about Emille Hirsch(Girl Next Door, Alpha Dog)? There may be no topping the original but The Breakfast Club is one of the rare old classics that can still be relevant today and, with Hughes' passing, it deserves a revamping as both a tribute to its creator and as a way for the classic to live on with a new audience.

Gabe's List

9. The Jericho Mile - (Original Release Date - 1979, TV Movie) So, I kick my list off with a TV movie from the 70's. Why would I do that? Well, because it's a damn good movie that almost no one born in the last 30 years is aware of, and even fewer have seen...which is exactly why it should be rebooted for today's audience. It's about a guy serving a life sentence for murder (a crime of passion, btw), who is a runner talented enough to make the Olympic team, which is evident even when he runs in basketball shoes in the potholed track in the prison yard. Because he is a convicted murderer he can't get a furlough to run on an Olympic sanctioned track, so officials decide to build one at the prison and give him his shot at greatness. His running partner inside is black, and the movie uses this to explore the racial and political minefield that prison can be. Oh, and the movie helped launch the career of Michael Mann, a director/producer you may have heard of. So who plays the lead? You need a sinewy athletic white guy who also has the acting chops to convey the emotional range of the character. Maybe someone like Paul Bettany.

8. Double Indemnity - (Original Release Date - 1944) This is all about seeing a modern day actor in a classic role (a theme of mine, you'll notice). I would love to see Phillip Seymour Hoffman play Edward G. Robinson's character. He was short portly guy, running around delivering one-liners and bad news. Hoffman would be great.

7. The Philadelphia Story - (Original Release Date - 1940) Tom Hanks is often called a modern day Jimmy Stewart and I would love to see Hanks reprise Stewart's role in this movie. It would be worth the price of admission just to see him re-enact the late night scene where Stewart's character drops off Katherine Hepburn's character, in which Stewart plays the funniest drunk person I have ever seen. Really, I'd like to see Hanks remake almost any Stewart movie, but we'll start here because it's a comedy. This might sound like sacrilege too, but I would like to see Isla Fisher in Hepburn's role. She'd be perfect. A smokin' hot red-head in a comedic role where the character is a little off-kilter? We've seen Fisher do that before.

6. The Wizard of Oz - (Original Release Date - 1939) I think this should be done simply because of the special effects. There have been numerous re-imaginings, The Wiz, Syfy's Tin Man, but there has not been a faithful remake of the movie. Some would say it's sacrilege to remake a movie that is such a landmark in the history of special effects, but that is why it would be perfect. Why not take this movie and show what can be done with CGI and 3-D? I think it could be great.

5. North by Northwest - (Original release date - 1959) This is simple and again about special effects. The movie is a tightly wound chase story, which features a bi-plane chasing the main character in a field, and a chase across the face of Mt. Rushmore. These two sequences with updated effects could be worth the price of admission alone. It would also be a chance to correct one of the biggest gaffes in film history. (Check out the kid in the background, and notice when he puts his fingers in his ears.)

4. The Matrix - (Original Relase Date - 1999) I know this kind of recent but this is all about special effects too. The stop-motion circular filming was groundbreaking, but imagine how much cooler it would look in 3-D. With today's 3-D technology this film could look that much better. It could be used to provide the same effect as the stop-motion, but better, and more often.

3. Manos: The Hands of Fate - (Original Release Date - 1966) "Manos" is universally considered the worst movie of all time, so I think it would be hilarious to see a faithful remake with A-list stars. That's it, that's the reason.

2. War Games - (Original Release Date - 1983) In sort of keeping one of my themes, this is about updating of technology, but this time it will actually affect the plot of the movie. Imagine this movie updated so that a kid hacks into Defense Department computers now. Imagine how scary this movie could be, especially in the paranoia of our post-9/11 world.

1. Fear of A Black Hat - (Original Release Date - 1994) The original is a mockumentary that clowns every major, and minor, rap act from the late eighties and early nineties. It does it with an original, and brilliant, parody-driven soundtrack. It follows a fictional rap group, N.W.H. (N*****s Wit Hats), as they try and navigate the popular rap scene, try to achieve stardom, all while beefin' with their rivals, The Jam Boys, and constantly losing white managers in mysterious ways, which leads to the classic line "We was outta town when that shit happened." My friend Henri and I even came up with the plot of the update, which is also more of a sequel...Tasty Taste, one of N.W.H., is in jail and the other two, Tone Def and Ice Cold, get back together to put on a benefit concert for his legal fees. They invite a roster of currently relevant rappers, and boom, let the clowning begin.

World Cup Group C

Here we are...the group that everyone cares about...and by everyone I mean the few soccer followers among our dozens and dozens of fans.

Group C

Algeria

England

Slovenia

USA

Who Will Win

England

Who Could Win

USA

The Darkhorse

Slovenia

How They'll Finish

4. Algeria - The Algerians have a lot of flair, but are maddeningly inconsistent. In the quarterfinals of the Africa Cup of Nations they beat the Ivory Coast, considered one of the best teams on the continent, but lost to Malawi 3-0 in that tournament and got smoked by Egypt in the semis, losing 4-0. Les Fennecs play with a lot of flair but will run into trouble because of the tough defensive squads that are in the group with them. That being said, they could just as easily break out offensively and cause some damage in the group, I just don't think that will happen. Getting out of the group should be considered a success for them.

3. Slovenia - Slovenia used to part of Yugoslavia (they gained independence in 1991) so they were once part of Yugoslavia's successful sports tradition. Since becoming independent they have only made the World Cup Final once, in 2002, so they might have a case of the "happy to be heres." They are inexperienced, but they are tough, very tough. They play a grinding defensive style of soccer. They allowed only four goals in ten qualifying games. The Slovenians don't really have any top flight players, except for their goalie Samir Handanovic. Handanovic is tall, quick, and has incredible range. He could be a thorn in the side of the strikers in this group. With great goal-tending, and great defense, I wouldn't be shocked if the Slovenians disrupt the English speakers and make it to the round of 16.

2. USA - The World Cup Final is a tourney built on trends, streaks, and traditions...only seven teams have ever won the title, for example. The Yanks have a few things going for them in that respect. They have experienced players and have played in three of the stadiums in which the tourney is being played. Most people know the stars on the field...Landon Donovan, Jozy Altidore, and outstanding goalie Tim Howard. The story for the Americans could just as easily those who aren't playing, most notably Charlie Davies and former wunderkind Freddy Adu. The catalyst will be Howard. He is on the short list of the best keepers in the world. If the Yanks can get some offense from their strikers to go along with Howard's predicted great play the team will do well.

1. England - The English have their sights set high. Here's the good. Back line players Rio Ferdinand and John Terry and midfielders Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard are among the best in the world at their positions, when they are healthy. They can also count on striker Wayne Rooney, who is playing his ass of right now. The bad? In short...baby mama drama. Terry's well publicized stepping out with a teammate's ex is having an effect on the mental state of the team. This will only get worse when the press starts leaning on them in South Africa. The X-factor? Coach Fabio Capello. If there is anything this coach can do it's whip the English into shape and make them ignore the pressure of the tabloid media. David Beckham has said the coach has injected the team with "steel." This team is one of the best on the field and if they get tough mentally and work through their locker room issues they are going to be extremely dangerous. Winning this group should be no issue.

Pushing For The Cushing

The positive steroid test of Houston Texans rookie linebacker Brian Cushing, and his subsequent re-winning of the Rookie of the Year award that was subject to a revote due to said positive test, has set off a fire storm on Twitter pages, blogs and news columns.

For a good solid week, sides have formed between old-school writers who see Cushing's victory as a bad message to up-and-coming young athletes, and a young generation of fans who frankly couldn't care less.

Cushing's steroid test was an unneeded black eye for the NFL after an offseason that has already seen two rape charges(one from a Super Bowl winning quarterback, the other a Hall of Fame linebacker) by high profile athletes. That being said, it's unfair to make Cushing the face of steroids in the NFL. Lest we forget, former-Panther-turned-Bears DE Julius Peppers tested positive for steroids. So did Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman. Both were Defensive Rookies of the Year like Cushing. Neither had their award put up for a revote and neither got the battery of abuse Cushing has taken over the Internet and on talk radio over the last few days.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to paint Cushing as the victim here. He tested positive for hCG, which is a substance that the body produces naturally that is also used as a masking agent for steroid use. It's the same substance that got Manny Ramirez his 50-game ban last year. With Cushing already under PED suspicion dating back to his last years at USC, all it took was this failed test to set off a cavalcade of "I told you sos". To assume that somehow kids in the high school ranks will now suddenly look at Cushing's winning of the ROTY award as a sign they can get away with cheating is a bit overdramatic. Steroids has been the focal point of sports over the last decade. From Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa to Lance Armstrong to Barry Bonds to Merriman and Peppers to The Mitchell Report to A-Rod and Manny and now to Cushing. It's been as much a part of the sports culture over the last two decades as the Nike swoosh.

Awarding Cushing the ROTY even after he tested positive for steroids is a bit unfortunate but it should be noted that he was voted again by Cushing's media opposers' fellow writers. This wasn't a fan vote. If you're going to take issue with anyone, perhaps the finger should be pointed at the guys who saw a positive steroid test and thought nothing of it. Cushing isn't the NFL's first cheater to fill up his trophy case and he won't be the last. It's easy to get on the high horse and say "Well, what about the kids?", but Cushing's 23. He's not too far removed from being in the same high school ranks that purists are now fighting to preserve. Steroids and performance-enhancing drugs are a seed that was planted a long time ago. It was an issue that the media and fans turned a blind eye to for years until it became hip and lucrative to switch sides. I'm not saying guys like King are hypocrites, but to to play the "tainted children" card is a bit too late. Kids are going to juice up to get ahead regardless if Cushing was Rookie of the Year or the next Chris Claiborne. In a world where there are so few spots open for outstanding athletes, everyone's fighting to get ahead. That isn't Cushing's fault. Cushing is the latest in a long line of cheaters. His mistake is no different than Peppers' or Merriman's or even Manny's last year.

If you want to punish Cushing or you want to send a message to the youth that Cushing should be viewed as a cautionary tale instead of an overcomer of adversity, then slap an asterisk on him. It's what writers were all too ready to do to Bonds before home run # 756 even sailed past the outfield wall. The ship has sailed on trying to stop the steroid epidemic from infecting the youth. Writers, parents, and fans had their opportunity to nip this thing in the bud over the last twenty years. Instead, we all stood idle and watched guys with enlarged heads jack fastballs 500 feet into the upper decks and gazed at 300lb offensive tackles bench pressing 400lbs and running 4.8 40's. Cushing is less a sign of the apocalypse as he is the product of our own ignorance. He did everything he could to try and prove his innocence. He took a poly. He pleaded his case and, in the end, he managed to win over the same old-school beat writers that marveled at the evolution of the game while syringes filled with toxic chemicals were being pumped in athletes' veins and win back an award people will forget he won in six months, much like we do with Merriman and Peppers.

Brian Cushing's win today wasn't a triumph, it was a sign that some writers and fans alike have accepted their roles in the steroid epidemic and realize that there is no turning back from the monster they created over the past two decades. Don't blame Brian Cushing for your guilty conscience.

Milk Carton All-Star of the Week

We here at BoomRoastedSports fancy ourselves as "The People's Sports Blog". That's why when our friend Kenny offered up his suggestion for this week's Milk Carton All-Star of the Week, we felt it was only right to give back those that give to us. So, without further ado, here's Kenny's pick for this week's Milk Carton All-Star of the Week:

In the wake of the Brian Cushing steroid hoopla this week, it seems apt that we give the Milk Carton All Star of the Week to former juicer David Boston. Boston was the 8th overall pick by the Arizona Cardinals out of THE Ohio State in the 1999 Draft, a Draft that featured Donovan McNabb, Edgerrin James, Ricky Williams and Daunte Culpepper.

After a 40-catch, 2 TD season as a rookie, Boston broke out in his second year. He caught 71 balls for 1,156 yards and 7 TDs. The next season was the best of his career. Boston caught 98 passes for a league-leading 1, 598 yards and 8 scores.

Then, it all went down hill. Wanting to be paid for his breakout season, Boston sulked his way through the 2002 season and inevitably got so banged up that he only played in eight games. Tired of his constant pouting and amidst rumors that he was dealing with a cocaine problem, the notoriously-cheap Cardinals let Boston skip town to San Diego. In his first year with the Chargers, Boston caught 70 passes for 880 yards and 7 TDs. While Boston's stats were impressive, his chiseled physique was even more awe-inspiring. With the sports world knee-deep in steroid speculation, naturally whispers started to circle about whether Boston was seeking some kind of pharmaceutical aid. After all, Boston was a 6'2, 228-pound wide receiver with the body of an Adonis who ran like a gazelle.

All of that speculation turned out to be warranted. After feuding with teammates and then-head coach Marty Schottenheimer, Boston was shipped to Miami for a 6th round pick. Almost immediately, the NFL hit Boston with a four-game suspension for a positive steroid test. On cue, Boston tore knee ligaments that led to him missing the entire 2004 season. The Dolphins cut him at the end of that year but eventually resigned him. He would play five more games before tearing his knee ligaments once again.

Boston's next stop came a year later in Tampa Bay, where he saw no playing time with the Bucs and was inevitably cut a year later after being nabbed for a DUI. While sitting on the shelf, a story came out stating Boston tested positive for GHB, a drug used by most bodybuilders. As much as Boston's legacy was clouded by steroid use, his biggest stigma amongst teammates was that he was soft. The most well-known story toward that effect came while Boston was with the Chargers and pleaded with teammates during practice to not hit him too hard because he didn't want them to mess up his nipple rings.....I wish I was making that up.

So let's give a juiced-up fist pump to the NFL's first roided-up metro-sexual, David Boston, everybody!

Bringin' The Heat

When it comes to attractive women, guys aren't picky. That's why when men's mags like Maxim or GQ or the now-defunct FHM release their annual listing of the top 100 or so hottest women on the planet, there isn't much debate amongst who should or shouldn't make the cut. There may be some dispute over rankings but, at the end of the day, a hot woman is a hot woman.

This year, however, that has changed. Maxim released its list of the 100 hottest women(known as the Maxim Hot 100) and perhaps even more head-scratching than some of the names that made the list were the perplexing amount of hotties that didn't.

So, without further ado, I decided to take a break from the daily grind of jock talk and do some hot chick investigating and was able to conjure up 10 names that should have made the list. Here goes:

1. Jennifer Sterger: Maxim's "hot" list is usually meant for women who are both physically attractive and socially relevant. That's what makes Sterger's absence even more confusing. For one, Sterger is the most recognizable name on the new Versus sports talk show "The Daily Line". Secondly, Sterger is, for a lack of a better term, undeniably gorgeous. She's also the rare breed of sports chick who....wait for it.....actually knows sports. She's not Sage Steele botching schedule dates and game highlights. Plus, as an added bonus, she's following both myself AND my wife on Twitter....which makes her 20 times cooler than, say, Rachel Nichols.

Where She'd Rank: Top 5

2. Christina Hendricks: With all do respect to Ms. Sterger, there wasn't a more glaring omission on Maxim's list than Christina Hendricks. After all, Esquire annointed her "The Sexiest Woman Alive" just a few months ago. Now you're telling me she can't crack a Top 100 of the world's hottest females? Seems like quite the difference of opinions. For a magazine obsessed with large breasts, you would think Hendricks would be Maxim's monthly poster child. Hendricks being left off the list becomes more insulting when you consider who made the cut. You're telling me you think Kelly Ripa is hotter than Christina Hendricks? Doubtful. In terms of relevance, Hendricks is also a key player in perhaps TV's best drama, Mad Men, on top of the aforementioned Esquire cover that gave her the same honor once bestowed upon Scarlett Johannson(who is 14th on Maxim's list).

Where She'd Rank: Top 10

3. Diora Baird: Ok, so maybe Diora Baird hasn't been in anything of note since Wedding Crashers a few years ago, but is she not hot? As model-heavy as the Maxim 100 was this year, there was no room for a former Guess model? Look, it's hard to talk about the qualifications of the snubbed without sounding redundant, so I'll say this: I defy you to take a long look at the picture of Diora Baird above and then scan through the Maxim 100 and tell me with a straight face that every one of those girls are better looking than Baird and I will retract this whole paragraph. However, I think you'll lose that bet once you get to #75.

Where She'd Rank: Top 25

4. Jenna Fischer: I'll be the first to admit that "The Office" has gotten stale over the past season or so, but it's still one of NBC's premier shows. This season, the focal point was Fischer's character, Pam, and her marriage and inevitable pregnancy with show husband, Jim. Did Fischer not look like a super-MILF throughout the entire season? Is she not reason enough to tune in to "The Office" even with the show's comedic flair waning? I thought so.

Where She'd Rank: Top 20-25

5. Heather Graham: There was a time where the name "Heather Graham" caused men to instantaneously perspire. As time passed, that run appears to be nearing its end. Still, doesn't the girl deserve a spot on the list simply by her past body of work? She was Rollergirl, for shit's sake! Felicity Shagwell? What about those scenes in "Killing Me Softly"?Sometimes, a person can put up such a storied career that they can get the benefit of the doubt simply from name recognition. Think of Michael Jordan: The Wizards Years. Graham is the Wizards version of MJ. Look, if Milla Jovovich somehow makes it to #21(Side note: You can't tell me that, of the 100 hottest women on the planet, Milla Jovovich is somehow better looking than 79 of them), then Heather Graham deserves a permanent spot on the list.

Where She'd Rank: 20-30(especially if Milla is #21)

6. Alyssa Milano: For people of me and Gabe's generation, Alyssa Milano was hot the minute she starred as Sam in "Who's The Boss?". Since then, there's been Poison Ivy, Fear, and most importantly, her role on "Charmed". Eventhough she's still doing the acting thing, Milano has endeared herself to the male populous as somewhat of a grown up version of the tomboy she played as Sam. A devoted Dodgers fan who has dated her share of notable athletes, Milano is still smokin' hot, even as she pushes 40. Like Graham, her prime may be over, but her waning years are still incredible.

Where She'd Rank: 30-40 range

7. Kate Mara: Kate Mara caught my attention in just the 30 seconds she was on screen as a U.S. Marshall in Iron Man 2. For others, it may have been her run on Entourage as E's love interest Brittney. She's also the granddaughter of late Giants owner Wellington Mara, which is good enough in Gabe's book.

Where She'd Rank: mid-60s

8.Gillian Jacobs: Maybe Maxim has some rule where they can only have one hot chick from a hit show, and yes, if I had to choose, Allison Brie(who was ranked 99th) would be the pick from the two girls on "Community" and yes, Jacobs is more "cute" than "hot", but still....she's cuter than Emma Roberts, right? Roberts went 78th, and she doesn't even deserve to be on the list. Give me Gillian any day of the week.

Where She'd Rank: mid-80's

9. Rashida Jones: Sometimes, you cast your eyes on someone and you get a hunch. I knew Rashida Jones would be hot the minute I saw her on Chappelle's Show in the "Love Contract" skit. Since then, she's did a temporary role on The Office, heated things up in "I Love You, Man" and now stars in "Parks and Rec". While most women rely on big boobs and a nice onion, Jones has the smooth caramel skin to complement the Julia Roberts-esque wide smile. That's a winning combination to me.

Where She'd Rank: mid-70s

10. Cobie Smulders: A show that brings in as many hot chicks consistently as How I Met Your Mother should have gotten more love on Maxim's list, especially Cobie Smulders as the show's regular hottie, Robin. She's Canadian, but don't hold that against her. Smulders doesn't have much of a resume beyond HIMYM, but women with less relevance have managed to crack the list(looking at you, Stephanie Pratt!).

Where She'd Rank: low-90's