Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Fake NBA Headline of The Week: LBJ to Fans "Stop Calling Me Pippen"

(Note: With the 2011 NBA season in jeopardy, we here at BoomRoastedSports thought we'd fill the void by coming up with our own pro basketball stories until the players and owners can come up with some of their own that doesn't involve millionaires and billionaires fighting over money. These are fake stories based off nothing but our own creativity, so please don't try to take it and run with it when we post "Chris Paul Traded To Bobcats" in two months.)




LeBron James came into the NBA in 2003 with the expectations that he will, not might, be the next Michael Jordan. However, the man known as "King James" isn't bothered by his inability thus far to live up to the lofty goals of replacing His Airness. Instead, the 26-year old former MVP has other reasons to be frustrated.


"Every time I touch the ball, all I hear is 'Scot-tie Pip-pen!' from the crowd. It's getting a little annoying." James said after his Miami Heat lost 121-111 to the Atlanta Hawks Tuesday night. The close loss to the Hawks last night still gives M-I-A the 2nd best record in the East at 7-3 behind the surprising 8-3 Bucks and fourth best in the league behind the 11-2 Warriors and the 10-2 defending champion Dallas Mavericks. "I mean, Scottie Pippen was named one of the 50 Greatest Players in NBA history and it's an honor for my name to be paired with his but I'd like to think the home fans would be better than that."


Yes, that's right. Fans IN MIAMI have been not-so-subtly alluding to James being a second fiddle on a Heat team that came thisclose to an NBA championship. Part of the reaction may be due to the fact that James' teammate, Dwayne Wade, is the early season front-runner for the MVP with an awesome 33 points, 6 rebounds and 6 assists per game stat line through 10 games for the 1st place Heat. After all, this IS Miami-Wade County, a fact not lost on LBJ: "D-Wade has made it known for years that this is HIS house. I get that, but I've always considered me and Dwayne equals. These people pay their money to see us play. They can do what they want, but I find some of the chants disturbing."


Being compared to "Flash" was something "The Akron Hammer" had to anticipate when he agreed to come to South Beach along with Chris Bosh last summer. However, James said there was a couple of examples of fan displeasure that went too far. "I saw a lady in the front row with a huge sign that said 'Delonte's better!' in big bold letters with a smiley face and a greater than sign above my name and, at first, I chuckled. Then, I looked closer and realized it was my mom."


The chants haven't been lost on James' high-priced teammates either. "It's unfortunate," said Wade, "You know, he could have just as easily went to New York last summer and lit up the Garden every night. He chose to come here and be a part of something that could be a big part of NBA history. Regardless of how I'm playing, LeBron's my boy and I wouldn't wish that kind of treatment on my worst enemy, let alone my teammate." Chris Bosh was a bit more coy: "I mean, at least the fans are recognizing him, good or bad. They care enough to scream at him. I get mistaken for Lamar Odom at least three times a week."


Perhaps, the All-Star forward will get a bit more recognition when the Heat take on Bosh's former team, the Toronto Raptors, on Friday night. As for James and the Pippen comparisons, Charles Barkley had a different take on things: "LeBron's no Scottie Pippen! Scottie got six rings! LeBron's got none! The fans need to be chanting 'Karl Malone' at his ass!"


Or perhaps "Charles Barkley".

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