Week 15 Picks cont...

Both men bring undefeated Week 15 records into Sunday after nailing two easy lay-ups in Atlanta and Dallas.

On to the rest of Week 15....

Redskins (+6.5) at Giants

Dave: Giants - When I told you last year that Jason Pierre-Paul was going to be a monster, I hope you listened to me. Right now, the Redskins' best strategy is to just punt the last three games in hopes of landing someone like RGIII or Matt Barkley. The Giants need to win out and they have all the momentum after yet another comeback victory, this time against Dallas. Eli goes for 300 here, JPP notches two more sacks and Gabe stands on his couch in a wife-beater and a Jesus piece while listening to "Lean Back" and doing the Rockaway at halftime. Giants by 13.

Gabe: Giants - My Giants have all of the momentum in the world right now. They finally got off the schneid, thanks in large part to Jason Garrett mismanaging the end of last Sunday night's game. JPP goes off and the Giants offense overwhelms the Redskins D. Giants by two touchdowns.

Packers (-13.5) at Chiefs

Dave: Packers - How angry would I be if my Packers lost to my wife's Chiefs? I told my wife it would be the equivalent of me coming home from a 23-hour shift at work to find her in a threesome with two other dudes while she was simultaneously stabbing both of our cats. Unless Romeo Crennel knows something about Ricky Stanzi that the world doesn't, I see this being another W for Titletown even without Greg Jennings. If it's not....this may very well be the last blog you read from me. Packers by 17.

Gabe: Chiefs - Quite simply, I think two touchdowns is too big of a spread. I have no real logical reason to think the Chiefs are even capable of hanging with the Packers, but two touchdowns is a huge number and I'd love to see the look on Dave's face if the Packers fuck around and lose this game.

Saints (-7.5) at Vikings

Dave: Saints - It's not a good sign when you have a QB controversy this late in the season.....even worse a sign if that battle is between Joe Webb and Christian Ponder. Less of a dispute and more unnerving for Viking fans is the fact that Adrian Peterson returns this week. What does that mean for their chances against N'awlins? Well, nothing, but it gives them a puncher's chance of staying within a touchdown. More likely, though, is Drew Brees carving up this horrid Vikings defense and Saints winning by double digits. Also, someday, somebody will explain to me how Leslie Frazier was able to keep his job after a season like this.

Gabe: Saints - Drew Brees is going to go off today and if the Vikings think they can run with the Saints, they are playing right into Drew Brees' hands. He loves a shootout. Saints by 14.

Seahawks (+3.5) at Bears

Dave: Seahawks - This Bears offense is stagnant without Jay Cutler and even more lifeless with Matt Forte out. The Seahawks are hardly "The Greatest Show On Turf" but they've managed to pull off a few upsets over some heavy hitters(Giants, Ravens) with the occasional offensive explosion. At the very least, Seattle keeps this within a field goal. More likely, Marshawn Lynch puts a dent in this Bears defense and derails their playoff hopes with an upset at Soldier Field. Seahawks by 6.

Gabe: Seahawks - The Seahawks are quietly getting their shit together. At the same time Chicago is falling apart. I honestly don't think the Chicago offense can keep up. I'll take the Seahawks for the straight up win.

Dolphins (+1.5) at Bills

Dave: Bills - I'm not sure why I keep riding with Buffalo except the fact that this game will be played in the cold, the Dolphins can't really run the ball and they just fired their head coach after he rallied the team back from an 0-7 start to win four of his last five. If that doesn't spell a team going into the tank as a final "Fuck you!" to the powers-that-be, then I'm not sure what will. Bills get one last W to salvage what once looked like a dream season. Buffalo by 7.

Gabe: Miami - I would like the Dolphins a lot more in the game if they hadn't just fired their coach. They were winning games and had some momentum. Buffalo has gone back to being terrible. I'll take a flyer and take Miami and the points.

Titans (-6.5) at Colts

Dave: Titans - I was going to continue my trend from last week and just write "Next!" but I wanted to say one quick thing. If voters rob Aaron Rodgers of a unanimous victory for the NFL MVP after he's put on one of the greatest QB seasons in history for a team that might go undefeated because they can't somehow detach their mouths from Peyton Manning's penis, then SHAME..ON...THEM. With or without Peyton Manning, this Colts team was going to be worse than in years' past. 0-16 bad? No. Potentially 5-11? Absolutely. Enough's enough with the Peyton Manning MVP hype.

Gabe: Titans - Next!

Bengals (-7) at Rams

Dave: Bengals - Andy Dalton vs. Kellen Clemens in a battle of two QB's who look like shortstops. Many have Dalton winning the ROTY but I really think he and A.J. Green will have a Willis McGahee-Ken Dorsey for the Heisman effect come voting time. Can you really make the case that one would have been as good without the other? I think the two cancel out and Cam Newton wins this one going away. If your only argument for Dalton is his team has more wins than Newton's, then you have no argument. I don't believe in team accomplishments affecting individual awards. Maybe that's just me. As for this game, I can't see St. Louis notching more than 6 points here. Bengals by 17.

Gabe: Bengals - The Bengals have been beating bad teams and losing to good ones. The Rams suck. Bengals by 11.

Lions (-1) at Raiders

Dave: Lions - A couple factors here: Ndomukong Suh is back and pissed off. The Lions are desperate to stay in the playoff hunt with Chicago having a potential gimme against Seattle, the Falcons blowing out Jacksonville and New York or Dallas on their heels. Also, Carson Palmer just looks plain awful since "unretiring". The Raiders are going to give Matt Stafford plenty of opportunities to go for 400 yards and 5 scores against them thanks to Palmer's Mr. Magoo passing accuracy. I'm thinking Lions by 10.

Gabe: Lions - Suh is going to keep it together for at least one game, right? Either way, the Lions are still fighting to get into the playoffs and need this win. Stafford should have a nice game. Lions by a touchdown.

Patriots (-7.5) at Broncos

Dave: Patriots - I fancy myself a Tim Tebow fan but even I recognize this as a battle of two overhyped evils. The media thinks everything Tebow does is magic and a win here will turn him from Football Jesus to an actual God. As for Brady, the man can never do any wrong in the eyes of the sports media so a win here will be just a day at the park for him. However, Brady comes into this for the first time in a while as NOT the most hyped QB on the field. The Patriots have had to hear Tebow's name all week. You really think Bill Belichick, who successfully outsmarted a cerebral assassin like Peyton Manning for a few years, hasn't spent tireless man hours coming up with a scheme to control Touchdown Timmy and finally put a stop to all this Tebow madness? Denver's not going to keep up with the Brady Bunch offensively. Pats by 14.

Gabe: Patriots - Did anyone see the Tim Tebow sketch on SNL last night? Outstanding. I think Tom Brady won't say it out loud, but he and Coach Hoodie want to win this game 49-0. I think the Pats go up big and do it early and take all of the steam out of the game. Pats by 17.

Jets (+2.5) at Eagles

Dave: Jets - A battle between two teams that should have been a lot better this season that also possess two excellent secondaries. This game will come down to who can run the ball because passing will be at a premium. We know Philly can't stop the run. We know, every now and then, New York can. We know the Jets are a smashmouth defense. We know Michael Vick is made of paper mache. I think Vince Young makes an appearance here and the Jets romp while Andy Reid gets booed out of the building. Jets by 16.

Gabe: Eagles - The Eagles' offense is really fast. I think they are too fast for the Jets. The Eagles are also at home and clinging to slim playoff hopes. They need this win. It will be a close game, but I think the Eagles get a late TD and win by 4.

Browns (+7) at Cardinals

Dave: Cardinals - Seneca Wallace vs. John Skelton.....I'd rather have my wife stand on my balls in high heels than watch this game. Joe Haden is going to put the clamps on Larry Fitzgerald so any thoughts that this will be even remotely exciting ends there. More likely, it's a field goal battle for the first three quarters before Patrick Peterson runs off another punt return TD and Arizona wins 10-6 with Jose Valverde picking up the save. And, yes, I know that means the Cardinals won't cover, but I really couldn't care less about this game.

Gabe: Browns - I was going to try to make an argument less coherent than Dave's for this game, but I'm not sure that's possible. No way the Cardinals win this by more than a touchdown. They'll win by 4 at the most, if they win at all.

Ravens (-2.5) at Chargers

Dave: Ravens - San Diego has nothing to play for, their coach is getting canned in three weeks and they are facing a team with a stout defense that could potentially wrap up the division and maybe even the one seed with a win here. I always worry about Joe Flacco playing where national TV cameras are also present but this Chargers team has been so putrid that I don't even think Flacco can screw this up. Ravens by 13 behind another big day from Ray Rice.

Gabe: Ravens - The Ravens defense is too good. The Chargers love to yack, especially in primetime. Ravens by 10.

Steelers (+3) at Niners

Dave: Steelers - No Maurkice Pouncey. No James Harrison and a hobbled Big Ben probably giving it a go against the best run defense in the country. This should be all San Fran, right? Wrong. As much of an impact James Harrison has for this defense, the Steelers will find a way to dominate without him. The Steelers are also pretty good against the run, too, which means the Niners are going to have to keep Pittsburgh at a distance by using the passing game. I like the Steelers' chances of moving the ball against a Pat Willis-less defense moreso than Alex Smith against this new Steel Curtain. Steelers use veteran experience to not crumble under the bright light of MNF and Alex Smith finds Troy Polamalu for the game-winning pick-6. And if you think this is bad, Niners fans, how about this: a loss here potentially drops you to the three seed and a possible date with Dallas, who beat the Niners back in Week 2. One and done for Jim Harbaugh's boys? You never know.

Gabe: Niners - The Steelers have to do all that traveling and are hobbled. The Pouncey injury could turn out to be huge. This will be a close, smash-mouth game, but I'll take the Niners to get the 4 point win.