Here's A Story...

Much like myself, the Super Bowl is a blessed event that needs no introduction or an overwhelming amount of hype. It's the most watched sporting event in this country's history and is the epitome of "appointment television". Still, this year's Super Bowl offers up quite a bit of intrigue, and not just because it's my Packers first Super Bowl appearance in 12 years.

Here's a look at a few matchups and storylines you should be interested in while you are counting your squares, pounding your beers and looking for things to do during the Black Eyed Peas' halftime show tomorrow.

1. Aaron Rodgers vs. Brett Favre: You would like to think that, by making a Super Bowl appearance just three years into being named the full-time starter, that Aaron Rodgers would have done enough to build a name for himself and we can finally enjoy a Packers season without Brett Favre looming over the media coverage. You would be wrong. The football media have been unwilling to let go of their boner for Favre and the last two weeks have been non-stop questions about the last guy to take the Packers to the Super Bowl. It goes without saying that this is a big game for Rodgers. A win here not only legitimizes him among the ranks of today's great QBs but it finally takes him out of Favre's shadow much like Steve Young's Super Bowl win in 1995 took a monkey named Joe Montana off of his back. The constant talk of Favre is unfair to Rodgers, who is coming back from two concussions this season to lead a team with 15 guys on the injured reserve to the Super Bowl after backing into the playoffs as the 6th seed. If Rodgers puts up numbers similar to Drew Brees' night last year(32-39, 288 yards, 2 TD), then we can put all the Favre talk to bed. However, if you are looking for a fun drinking game to play tomorrow, take a shot for every time Brett Favre's name comes up during the Super Bowl....something tells me Aaron Rodgers will be doing the same if the Packers aren't victorious over Pittsburgh tomorrow night.

2. Ben Roethlisberger vs. The World: All of the storybook turnaround hype has seemed to, albeit justified, go to Michael Vick, who went from dog-killing prison inmate to Pro Bowl starting QB. Lost in the all the puppy love surrounding Vick, however, is the fact that Ben Roethlisberger will be competing for his third Super Bowl ring in 8 years following an offseason that saw Big Ben get put through the PR ringer after not one but two sexual assault charges. As bad a beating Vick took from PETA and various media outlets, Roethlisberger was right there with him as an NFL pariah. That point became all the more blatant this week when ESPN, and several other media outlets, made a huge deal out of Roethlisberger and a few of his teammates being seen at a piano bar until nearly two in the morning. This wasn't a strip club or a college dorm party. It was a piano bar. Now, I know a setting where both alcohol, Ben Roethlisberger and women are all present makes you uneasy if you are a Steelers fan or coach or, most importantly, a woman anywhere near a bathroom stall, but let's not get too carried away here. For all the mistakes this man has made over the last few years, I'd like to think a recently-engaged Big Ben would be smart enough to not to do anything extremely stupid the week before the biggest game of the season in a year where his every move is being watched like a hawk. Roethlisberger is as entitled to a good time as Vick is to owning a beagle or Donte Stallworth is to driving a car(if not, more so, since he wasn't convicted of anything). Roethlisberger may be a bonehead, but he's not the Son of Sam.

That being said, there will be no bigger "Fuck You" from Ben to the rest of the world than if he manages to hoist the Lombardi Trophy for a third time. As Ray Lewis and Kobe Bryant can attest, nothing vindicates you from a season of bad press more than winning a championship. Whether the "rapist" stigma ever fully leaves Roethlisberger won't be known until years down the road, but don't think the thought of shoving it in people's faces(much like he did in that bathroom stall....sorry, couldn't resist) isn't on the mind of Number Seven come Sunday night.

3. Clay Matthews vs. Troy Polamalu: It was the closest vote for a Defensive Player of the Year award we've seen in years and, in my bias opinion, the wrong guy won. Troy Polamalu edged out Clay Matthews by two votes to win defensive MVP. We can spend all day dissecting who was better this season, but the biggest test over who is more valuable will come Sunday. Make no mistake about it, Clay Matthews IS the Packers' pass rush. Cullen Jenkins is a decent rusher. B.J. Raji continues to emerge, as has Erik Walden, but for the Packers to win tomorrow, they need "The Ultimate Warrior" to rattle Big Ben's brain a few times. The same goes for Polamalu. As Joe Flacco knows, Troy needs to be accounted for at all times, and Polamalu's ability as someone who is both excellent in coverage and as a blitzer means Aaron Rodgers has to keep a watchful eye on 42. While the Defensive Player of the Year award is a meaningless regular season trophy, the true title of "best defensive player" should go to the guy who makes the biggest splash on the biggest stage tomorrow evening. Polamalu has been invisible so far this postseason, with just seven tackles in two games, but that becomes a moot point if he continues to wreak havoc like he has done all season. The same goes for Matthews, who has 3.5 sacks in 3 games. He has to be everywhere to keep Roethlisberger from having the game he had against Green Bay in last year's epic clash.

Polamalu. Matthews. It's the battle of the hair. Winner takes all.

4. Joe Buck and Troy Aikman vs. Your Mute Button: The Super Bowl is such a big entity in and of itself that it shouldn't be bogged down by which network wins the rights to televise and have it commentated by their respective announce team. When it came down to it, there was no winners no matter how you looked at it. For CBS, you had the lullaby-inducing drone of Phil Simms and Greg Gumbel. NBC has the nasally annoyance of Cris Collinsworth. ESPN, the masters of overhype, would have trotted out "Captain Obvious" Jon Gruden. So, instead, we got stuck with atrocious bromance that is Joe Buck and Troy Aikman. Now, both men's inadequacies in the booth have been well-documented so they don't need repeating in this space, but the question is: When will be your breaking point? First quarter? Halftime? 6 minutes to go in the 3rd? Inevitably, you will get sick of Buck overstating every deep pass or Aikman's good 'ol boy drawl muttering non-sensical jargon. If the NFL is going to waste big bucks on elaborate halftime shows, hours upon hours of pregame coverage and various other over-the-top methods to put a bow on its flagship event, it should be able to bring in its own dream announce team. 10 years ago, I would have said Pat Summerall and John Madden would be the way to go, but Madden has become the professor of the "Overstating The Obvious" course Gruden now masters and Summerall has been put out to pasture. The football world really doesn't have anyone out there anymore that fans would pine to listen to(except maybe Gus Johnson). In a humorous sense, I would love to see Brett Favre call this game just to force him into either gushing over Aaron Rodgers or being publicly unable to hold back his anger toward his former team and his heir apparent. What about Vin Scully? Certianly, the master of baseball announcing could handle one football game. Sure, Scully will be out of place talking about zone coverages and blocking schemes after decades of balls and strikes, but could he be worse than Buck and Aikman? What about Brent Musberger, the king of college football? He has football experience and he's far more of a joy to listen to than any of these other football cronies we have now. Even better, why not let the fans call the game? The Super Bowl will be heavily censored anyway, wouldn't it be entertaining to take two drunk wahoos out of the stands and let them break down what we're seeing. Chances are, you'll be doing that at home anyway. The NFL can put out an aptitude quiz and see who knows the most about football, get two lucky winners liquored and let them have at it. It can't be anymore of an abomination than what we'll be listening to tomorrow night anyway, right?

5. Fergie's Boobs in HD vs. Your Wife/Girlfriend/Baby Mama: The halftime show hasn't had anything close to an "urban" musical act since Janet Jackson whipped out her titty a few years ago. Sadly, the closest hip-hop fans will get to a Super Bowl halftime show will be the Black Eyed Peas tomorrow night. As any male who has ever watched anything BEP-related over the years can attest, there's only one reason to watch the Black Eyed Peas: Fergie. Chances are, you'll be watching BEP's set for two reasons: 1. You like terrible music. 2. To stare at Fergie in the glory of high-def for a half hour. Assuming you're not a lughead who wants to fist pump to "Let's Get Retarded" during halftime, you'll probably be opting for Door #2. If that's the case, be prepared for snarky remarks from your female significant other about Fergie "not being all that hot" or getting chastised for drooling over "The Dutchess" while everything around you is a blur(or, if you're like me, you'll get to listen to your buddy make jokes about how Fergie once pissed herself on stage as my friend Jakson points out every time her name is brought up). Look, the Peas aren't edgy enough to try anything close to what Janet and Justin Timberlake did in 2004, but after suffering through old-fogey acts like The Who and Bruce Springsteen over the years, this is the closest males of our demographic are going to get to seeing a hot chick for an extended period of time during a football game. Will Fergie whip 'em out on stage? Of course not. Will there be sexually-tinged innuendos like Prince did in 2006? Probably not. All you will get is the only watchable member of a extremely-intolerable pseudo-rap group grinding around in scantily-clad outfits while your woman gives you dirty looks. So, fellas, enjoy....and bob and weave.