If you watched me collapse down the stretch like Gabe's Mets during our 2009 NFL weekly pick-off, then you know to take my prognostications with a grain of salt(although, when compared to Stephen A. Smith's lofty predictions, I don't look nearly as bad). Nevertheless, I'm back again with five bold statements you should take to the bank the rest of this year. Here they are:
1. Some network will overpay Erin Andrews and the inevitable "Erin Andrews Show" will tank: All of this talk about free agency has allowed us to overlook the soon-to-expiring contract of another hot sports entity: ESPN's sideline princess, Erin Andrews. Andrews is coming off a Javy Lopez-like contract year. She blew up the Internet with an "accidentally" leaked peep hole video of her butt naked in her hotel room. Then, she bounced back from that fiasco to make an Xavier-like run in Dancing With The Stars. Now, she will go back to the negotiating table when her contract expires in July(from what I'm told, it's July 1) with her popularity at its peak and her star on the rise. So what happens now with Erin Andrews? You can't expect her to want to go back to doing what she was doing before now that she's twice as popular and well-known as she was a year ago. That's why she'll ask for her own show, and somebody(be it ABC, FoxSports, ESPN, Versus, etc.) will give it to her. She's become a household name. Hell, Bonnie Hunt managed to lock down a show and she's a nobody. You don't think somebody will greenlight "The Erin Andrews Show" given her status as a 17-35 male magnet? If people are tuning in for Michelle Beadle's homely mug on SportsNation, you don't think they'd do the same for Andrews? Of course they would!
Here's the thing: We don't know if Erin Andrews is an actual bonafide sports chick who can break bread with star athletes or just some teleprompter champion who couldn't tell an out route from an outhouse. Her claims to fame thus far have been getting naked on camera, doing the cha-cha for charity and lobbing softball questions on the sidelines. Inevitably, you need something besides being hot as a reason for people to watch your show. Guys can find hot chicks anywhere. If you want them to pay attention to you, you need to have some substance. You also need your production staff and your network to not portray you as some pin-up model and instead, as someone whose views should be respected. I'm not sure if Andrews can get that kind of respect from both the suits and a fickle fan base who will be tuning in for something other than Andrews' thoughts on the Jets' offseason acquisitions.
2. Dirk Nowitzki will leave Dallas as a free agent this season: When you look at Dirk Nowitzki's situation, it isn't that much different from LeBron James'. He's a free agent who wants to play for a winner while he has the opportunity to pick his location. Like James, Nowitzki's previous employer will try to bring back Dirk by trying to sell the Mavs as a contender, even if everything in the past suggests otherwise. Look, I know the odds are against me on this one, but hear me out. Nobody thought Steve Nash would ever leave Dallas to go back to Phoenix, but it eventually happened. Nowitzki wants a no-trade clause and a salary close to the money he was making before(he was scheduled to make $21 million had he not opted out of his final year). If Mark Cuban low-balls Dirk like he did Nash, who is to say Dirk won't get offended and go elsewhere?
After all, Dirk has options. He could reunite with Nash in Phoenix. The Suns are about to lose Amare Stoudemire so they can use the money that would have went to Amare and pay Dirk and make one last run before Nash retires. Remember, the Suns made an improbable run to the Western Conference Finals this past season and that's with guys like Jared Dudley and Robin Lopez. You team Dirk with Nash again, and keep that supporting cast of J-Rich, Lopez, Hill and Barbosa, and the Suns are in a better position than Dallas would be. Dallas has Jason Kidd's rotting corpse, an aging Jason Terry, the solid-but-unproven Caron Butler, and Erick Dampier's contract. They've lost in the first round three of the last four years. For whatever reason, they just can't get in done in May and June. Can Cuban really say that the Mavs can make a title run if Dirk comes back and the team trades half of its core for LeBron? Another interesting option? New Jersey. They have Dirk's old coach Avery Johnson, who led Dirk's Mavs to the Finals in 2006. They have a need at small forward and are probably on the outside looking in in the LeBron Sweepstakes. Could a Brook Lopez-Derrick Favors-Dirk-mid-level-free agent(let's say Ray Allen)-Devin Harris starting five compete in the weak East? I think so.
Again, I'd say there's a 40% chance of Dirk leaving, but it's not as impossible as the suits in Dallas' front office would lead you to believe. LeBron's leaving Cleveland. Paul Pierce may be leaving Boston. There are places Dirk can go and contend that are better than Dallas. Loyalty is great, but it also has a price.
3. The Philadelphia Eagles won't win more than 6 games this season: Karma tends to strike teams that bid adieu to their franchise QB a bit too soon. The Broncos never really recovered when John Elway left. Same goes for Miami with Dan Marino(though, in fairness, they both retired. They weren't traded). The Packers went 6-10 after trading Brett Favre. The Niners missed the playoffs in their first year without Joe Montana. The same will hold true for Philadelphia after foolishly trading QB Donovan McNabb to division rival Washington. McNabb may not be a Hall of Famer like the previously mentioned signal-callers but he's still a guy who carried his team to five NFC Championship appearances and a Super Bowl berth. Kevin Kolb, McNabb's successor, is adequate but he's going to need time to develop chemistry with his young receivers like DeSean Jackson.
On top of that, the team cut longtime rusher Brian Westbrook. The moves may have made Philly younger but it also cut into the team's leadership. Add the death of Jim Johnson last year causing the defense to take a step back and the embarrassing way they finished last season(with back-to-back losses to the Cowboys that both cost them the division title AND eliminated them from the playoffs). The defense also has its share of disgruntled employees. Ellis Hobbs wants a new deal. Asante Samuel was on the trading block for a while. The secondary also takes a hit with Marlin Jackson out for the season and rookie Nate Allen replacing him at free safety.
The division also got better around the Eagles. The Giants added to their defense and, if you know anything about New York teams, they will use the Chad Jones tragedy as a motivation this season(Another prediction inside of a prediction: Giants' 1st round pick, DE Jason Pierre-Paul: 8 sacks, 4 forced fumbles.....take that to the bank). The Redskins not only added McNabb(who obviously will be looking for revenge against Philly) but also hired Mike Shanahan as head coach, brought in Trent Williams and Jammal Brown to shore up the O-Line as well as a couple once-great RBs in Larry Johnson and Willie Parker to help the running game. Dallas? Well, they'll take a step back with Flozell Adams no longer protecting Tony Romo's blind side but they added rookie WR Dez Bryant and that defense is still playoff-caliber. So, the road ahead for Philly is going to be tougher and having to break in a new QB just makes it that much more difficult. I'm not saying Kolb will be a total bust, but expecting him to pick up where McNabb left off is a bit far-fetched.
4. By September, most of America will forget about the World Cup: I mentioned this last year in my Michael Jackson tribute and I'll say it again: Americans are fad-jumpers. We like to be patriotic when it suits us. Most of us only really cared about soccer because Team USA was still in it. Now that they aren't? It's back to business as usual. You know why football is America's new pasttime? Because it's a sport dominated by American-born players. Baseball used to be like that, but as international players started to catch up, Americans lost interest. The same for basketball. We all loved watching Team USA in the Olympics, until we started getting our ass kicked. Then, The Redeem Team won the gold and, all of a sudden, it was all about rooting for America. Why do you think hockey isn't popular anymore? There aren't that many American stars(which is funny, because hockey for the last three decades was ruled by Mario Lemieux and Wayne Gretzky....both Canadians). American sports fans are the biggest bandwagoners in the world. They are as fickle as a child's mind. Most of the people who clogged up Twitter and Facebook with GO USA chants couldn't name you five soccer players playing in the World Cup.
We like to get ourselves all riled up for the Olympics, not because we are patriotic souls, but because we enjoy having bragging rights. We like to be arrogant and rub victory in the faces of the less fortunate. Anyone with a legitimate amount of followers on Twitter will notice the dearth of World Cup tweets since Ghana sent USA packing a few days ago. Now, I don't mind soccer, but it's certainly way down on my list of sports. I rooted for Italy this year, but I'll admit I couldn't give you one person on the team(and that's with Gabe spending the spring doing World Cup previews on this very website), but at least I'll admit it. I'm not some fairweather fan like most of America decided to be when USA made the Round of 16. Regardless, USA's run is over and the World Cup will get a little buzz these next couple months because only NBA free agency and baseball stand in its way of making headlines. However, the closer we get to NFL training camp, the further World Cup soccer will appear in the rear view mirror of most Americans. The flags will go back in the closet and we'll go back to not caring about soccer. It's just the American way.
5. By this time next year, Americans will also forget about Drake: I always get asked about my hatred of Drake. Look, I've listened to hip-hop for nearly 20 years. I know the difference between a real MC and a guy who is the product of hype of well-placed marketing. Drake is the latter. He got on a record with three other notable rappers(one of which, Lil Wayne, who I might dislike more than I dislike Drake) and got outshined by at least two of them(Kanye and Eminem...as if I had clarify). Drake sings AND he raps. You can't do both and expect to be credible to hardcore hip-hop fans. It didn't work for Ja Rule. It didn't work for Missy Elliot. Even 50 Cent saw his numbers drop when he started to harmonize. Now, I know, Drake sold nearly half a million copies in his first week, which is impressive in a economy where funds are low and CD sales are dwindling, but record sales never translate to talent. MC Hammer sold alot of records. So did Vanilla Ice. Would you call them some of hip-hop's greatest lyricists? In the end, talent wins out. Talib Kweli doesn't sell many records, but he's still around. The same for Gabe's boys, The Roots. Same goes for guys like Method Man and Redman. When you have skills, people will find you.
Eventually, the fickle fan base that buys Drake's records(read: suburban white kids) will get tired of his Al B. Sure sing-a-long gimmick and move on to someone else. Don't believe me? When's the last time you heard a Jibbs record? How about Young Joc? Remember how hot Nelly was at one time? Now, he couldn't sell his album at Cardinals games. Hip-hop, as myself and Gabe came to know it and love it as we grew up, has died tragically. It went from a creative art form to a gimmick that corporations unfamiliar with the culture now use to line their pockets. Every now and then, you get a hot album like Jay-Z's Blueprint 3 or Eminem's Recovery, but for the most part, hip-hop now consists of ringtone rappers. As the state of hip-hop moves more and more toward guys with weak flows and nursery rhymes, hot rappers of the moment become more and more replaceable. That will become evident when Drake is the delivery boy for Topper's Pizza a year from now.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Loyalty or Legacy?
"If you stay in Cleveland, you will find peace. You will find a wonderful woman, and you will have sons and daughters, who will have children. And they'll all love you and remember your name. But when your children are dead, and their children after them, your name will be forgotten..If you go elsewhere, glory will be yours. They will write stories about your victories for thousands of years! And the world will remember your name. But if you leave Ohio, you will never come back...for your glory walks hand-in-hand with your doom. And I shall never see you again. "
- Adapted version of Thetis' speech in the movie Troy, as if told to LeBron James.
Thursday starts the saga some have waited years to see unfold. Thursday is the day the true courting of LeBron James and the other members of what I will call "The Mercenary Six" (Carlos Boozer, Chris Bosh, Dwayne Wade, Amare Stoudemire, and Joe Johnson) begins. While the futures of the other five are headline-worthy in their own right, Free Agency 2010 starts and ends with where the man known as "King James" ends up. We've heard day after day that he's leaning here or leaning there. There's been months of roster-shuffling and money-shifting. There's all of these reports about LeBron's character, his personality, and all these quotes and inside sources from people claiming to know LeBron's intentions but are mostly only looking out for their own interests. Writers, bloggers, reporters, and fans alike are fighting to be the one who gets the first scoop on LeBron as if they were staking out right field waiting on Roger Maris' 61st home run.
LeBron's decision comes down to what kind of message he wants to send to fans both in Cleveland and outside of it with his newest career move. Will he choose to be loyal to his hometown, the town that has had his back since he was just a mere high school prodigy? We've heard for years about LeBron's infamous loyalty. Will that be on display in these next coming weeks? Or will LeBron finally decide that enough is enough and chase greener pastures and more worthwhile accomplishments outside of Ohio? It's the question that's been asked for two years and, while everybody and their mother has spent the opening days of this summer doing their best campaign pitch, we know that the true contenders for "The Akron Hammer" are a small, chosen few. So, here's a list of contenders, the message LeBron sends by signing with them, and what "The King" can expect if he decides to dot the I's and cross the T's.
THE FAB FOUR
Cleveland Cavaliers
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He's loyal.
What He Can Expect: For a team that can ill-afford to lose the biggest star the city of Cleveland has seen since Jim Brown, the Cavs don't seem like a team that understands the severity of losing their franchise player. For one, unlike teams like New Jersey and Chicago(the other big contenders in the LeBron Sweepstakes), the Cavs don't have a coach OR a GM right now. Maybe those are spaces they feel like they can fill after LeBron's signed, sealed and delivered since no respectable coach or GM is going to come to Cleveland if the team has to rebuild post-LeBron. Still, that kind of uncertainty doesn't exactly help their chances of keeping LeBron. Right now, the dream scenario from a coach/GM standpoint is luring Phil Jackson away from L.A. and hiring recently-fired Blazers GM Kevin Pritchard. Phil Jackson is the best of the possible candidates and probably the only one that will convince LeBron that Cleveland is serious about winning titles. You aren't getting LeBron with Byron Scott or Brian Shaw or Jeff Van Gundy as your head coach...especially when Chicago hired the league's hottest coaching prospect in Tom Thibodeau. Pritchard, meanwhile, helped rebuild Portland from "The Jailblazers" to a legit contender in the much-tougher West. He's a significant upgrade over anyone Cleveland's had since 2003.
Plus, as sad as this might be, the Cavs may actually be WORSE than they were following their elimination at the hands of Boston. Shaq is gone. Big Z is probably gone. I don't see a team giving up anything legitimate for Mo Williams and/or Delonte West and the playoffs exposed Antawn Jamison as a bad fit as LeBron's #2. On top of that, Jamison plays the same position as Chris Bosh, who has pretty much said his first choice is to go where LeBron goes. I hate to break it to you, Cleveland, but your city isn't exactly a hot bed for potential free agents. You think Bosh is passing up South Beach or Times Square to play in a rust bucket town like Cleveland?(Side rant: I don't feel too bad for Cavs fans if and when LeBron leaves. Yes, this is a stomach punch the city doesn't need but let's face facts, most Cavs "fans" were merely LeBron fans. 90% of them will root for whoever LeBron plays for and the other 10% will either stop caring about basketball or kill themselves. I don't feel sorry for a fan base that's only interest in basketball was hitching its wagon to LeBron James.)
Likelihood of LeBron signing: 20-1
New York Knicks
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He wants to be a global superstar.
What He Can Expect: It would risky for LeBron to go from the pressure of winning a title in a small market like Cleveland to the heightened expectations of the Big Apple. By signing in New York, LeBron will be attempting to become the Jay-Z of the NBA: a star who is not only interested in being the best at his craft, but becoming a worldwide entity. New York offers LeBron the chance to be a household name in places that probably have never seen a basketball. It's the biggest sports market in America. It also gives LeBron the worst chance of the top four contenders to win a title. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Knicks fans, but your team sucks. David Lee is your best player and he has one foot out of the door. Even if you turn Lee into Chris Bosh, it's a two-man show. The ghost of Isiah Thomas(as I mentioned in the draft review) haunts this team. The bad trades, horrible contracts, terrible draft picks(both made and traded away) has turned this team into a high-profile cellar dweller. LeBron only signs here if he decides to say "I'll give up being the game's greatest winner in exchange for being a Michael Jordan-like endorsement whore". That's the only reason he comes to MSG. Do you really see LeBron winning a title with a starting five of himself, Bosh, Eddy Curry, Toney Douglas and Danilo Gallinari? You think LeBron finds that enticing after spending the last 8 years carrying the Cavs on his back? Get real.
Chances of LeBron signing: 10-1
Chicago Bulls
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He wants to rebuild the Bulls dynasty.
What He Can Expect: Critics keep using "MJ's shadow" as a reason LeBron will steer clear of the Windy City. If that's your best excuse, then you don't have an excuse. LeBron has been groomed to be "Like Mike" since he picked up a basketball. He wore the #23 his entire career for Christ's sake! If LeBron was put off by being in Jordan's shadow, he wouldn't have waited until now to change his number to 6. The fact is, with their recent maneuvering, the hiring of Tom Thibodeau, and the presence of point guard Derrick Rose and forwards Joakim Noah and Luol Deng(assuming they aren't dealt in exchange for Bosh in a sign and trade) make the Bulls the most enticing offer for King James. There are reports that LeBron's already leaning towards Chicago, and really, the only way he passes this up is if the Bulls suits does something to piss him off or he gets absolutely wowed somewhere else. Chicago, as much as it pains me to say it, makes the most sense for LeBron is he's as determined to be a champion as we are lead to believe. Thibodeau's focus on defense is right in LeBron's wheelhouse. The only real drawback to the Chicago scenario is that both LeBron and Rose are ball-dominant and, while Rose is the type of guard that makes his teammates better, it remains to be seen if a young star-in-the-making like Rose would be willing to take a backseat to a guy like LeBron. Regardless, many insiders seem to believe the Bulls are a James Johnson trade away(or a Deng trade away) from getting a guy like Bosh or Joe Johnson to come join LeBron(or some combination of "The Mercenary Six") to come to "The House That MJ Built" and, if or when that happens, Chicago becomes the team to beat over the next 5-6 years.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing: 3-1
New Jersey/Brooklyn Nets
The Message LeBron Sends By Signing: He's loyal.....to his buddy Jay-Z.
What He Can Expect: The Nets, in my opinion, are in a better position than the Knicks to get LeBron. They have an aggressive new owner in Mikhail Prokhorov. They have two decent All-Star quality young pieces in guard Devin Harris(if he isn't traded) and center Brook Lopez. They have another potential star in 3rd overall pick Derrick Favors and they have cap room to add LeBron plus one. Also, unlike the Knicks, the Nets haven't mortgaged the next couple year's worth of draft picks in foolish trades(Knicks gave Houston a first in 2012 and offered to swap in 2011, for the rights to free up some cap space). A Lopez-Favors-LeBron-Joe Johnson-Harris starting five may not be as good as what Chicago can offer but definitely bests what Cleveland and New York have. Plus, while he'll spend a year or two in the Garden State, eventually he'll be moving to Brooklyn and hitching his wagon to Jay-Z and becoming the type of Roc-A-Fella star Jay tried to make with Memphis Bleek and Amil. So he gets to play in a big market AND become a marketing piece with a proven brand. The catch is that he'll be playing for Avery Johnson, who is not nearly the big time coach that many make him out to be.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing: 12-1
THE LONGSHOTS
Miami Heat
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He's OK with taking a backseat in exchange for a title.
What He Can Expect: Somehow, people have it in their head that, if Miami can move Michael Beasley, the Heat will have room for three of "The Mercenary Six". If that's true and the Heat can finagle a Bosh-Wade-LeBron trifecta, then Miami becomes the belle of the ball in the NBA and the next 5 or 6 titles go through South Beach. The problem for LeBron will be the detractors who will say he needed to piggyback D-Wade to put rings on his finger. Does LeBron really want his legacy to be the Pippen to Flash's MJ? LeBron was groomed to be the most dominant force the NBA has ever seen. By signing with Miami, he's basically admitting that he can't lead a team to the promised land and that years of hype as "The Chosen One" was nothing more than exactly that: hype. Still, winning inevitably erases all the negativity that surrounds a big star(Right, Kobe?) and if LeBron wins a few rings and helps build a dynasty in Miami, that's a hell of a lot better than trying to be his own man and failing miserably in Cleveland and New York. Still it comes down to a matter of pride and I just can't see LeBron, at 25, admitting that he can't spear-head a championship team.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing: 30-1
Los Angeles Clippers:
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He's desperate.
What He Can Expect: A blown ACL or two......just kidding....sort of. I've never been one for curses or bad omens but clearly karma comes around every so often to roshambo the Clippers. We saw it with Blake Griffin last year. This team just can't win for losing. L.A. would be the kind of big market that would pique LeBron's interest, but he would a. be sharing an arena with Kobe Bryant(who has five rings and is in position for a couple more) and b. would be accepting huge money from a well-publicized racist in owner Donald Sterling. That's a public relations nightmare for LeBron(although, if bashing Rihanna's face in didn't keep Chris Brown from a performance at the BET Awards, then I can't see how linking up with the NBA's David Duke will kill LeBron's credibility). Still, a Kaman-Griffin-LeBron-Eric Gordon-Baron Davis starting five with 2010 rookie Al-Farouq Aminu and DeAndre Jordan off the bench is a respectable team, if they can get the right guys in the front office and on the sidelines and manage to avoid the black cloud that has surrounded this team for decades, then this becomes a solid location even with Kobe as a roommate. LeBron, however, doesn't seem like a guy who would take money from a scrupulous dirtbag like Sterling just for the sake of getting paid and, eventhough Sterling is certain he'll land LeBron, I'd say LeBron has as much of a chance of coming to L.A. as Biggie's casket.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing: 50-1
Dallas Mavericks
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: He wants to get PAID.
What He Can Expect: LeBron's arrival in Dallas would require a sign-and-trade, which means the Mavs will have to part with the likes of Erick Dampier, Caron Butler and highly-touted point guard Rodrigue Beaubois. That still leaves Dallas with Brendan Haywood, Dirk(who opted out, but will probably re-sign if LeBron comes. Although, if Dirk looks like he's testing the market, this immediately becomes a huge story in and of itself), Jason Terry and Jason Kidd's corpse. Now, Mark Cuban can sell the Mavs better than any owner or marketer can sell anything, but it would be a hard sell that a team led by Dirk and Kidd(one, a playoff choke artist, the other a choke artist of the domestic abuse variety.......oh, and an aging point guard without a jumper to speak of) can give LeBron the kind of supporting cast required to build a dynasty. Nowitzki, in his best season, couldn't get out of the first round and was at the forefront of a Mavs team that choked away the NBA championship to D-Wade's Heat. Kidd, meanwhile, has made a career of coming up short and, even in his prime, couldn't pry a championship from the Lakers and Spurs, respectively, while with the Nets. Plus, Kidd is an infamous coach killer. His presence almost guarantees front office uncertainty. You really want LeBron around that kind of environment? The plus side is there's no sales tax in Texas, making that extra $30 mil LeBron would make in a sign-and-trade that much sweeter, but if wealth is LeBron's ultimate goal, he can certainly make his share of coin in New York.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing(or agreeing to a sign-and-trade): 40-1
Boston Celtics
The Message LeBron Would Be Sending: If he can't beat 'em, he'll join 'em.
What He Can Expect: It's the scenario that doesn't get much talk but should. With Rasheed Wallace retiring, Ray Allen a free agent, and Paul Pierce eligible to opt out, the C's can, theoretically, wave bye-bye to those three and go hard after LeBron and pair him with the NBA's newest rising star, Rajon Rondo, and the rotting cadaver known as Kevin Garnett. No Pierce, 'Sheed, and Shuttlesworth sets "The Big Three" ablaze but Boston fans will let that go if it means getting a all-time great in his prime like LeBron. It makes sense for Boston, too. Allen is washed up. Pierce is getting there and Wallace is not playing another NBA game. You can trade in three over-30 year old marquee names for LeBron and midlevel free agent X. Plus, you can sell LeBron on being a part of the greatest NBA franchise in the history of the game, a legit team builder in GM Danny Ainge and a bonafide star in Rondo, who proved he can carry the team when the chips are down. KG might be finished but the presence of LeBron lightens the load for "The Big Ticket" and may add another year or two to those balding wheels. Also, KG's trademark midrange jumper will keep him out of the paint and allow LeBron to bulldoze his way to the basket(something James couldn't do with Shaq's large physique clogging the paint).
The key, of course, is Pierce opting out. With the new CBA bringing uncertainty, agents are trying to lock down big, long-term deals for their clients now instead of waiting til next year when money will be tighter. Pierce is represented by the same agent as Tyson Chandler and word on the street is Chandler is planning to opt out for that very reason: to get his money now, while he still can. If Dirk Nowitzki is willing to opt out of a good situation in Dallas, you can definitely tell that there is some unrest among the NBA's best players as to whether they can still get the kind of money they are accustomed to. If there's a dark horse in the LeBron sweepstakes, it's Boston: a team that managed to come within a few baskets of an improbable title run and has made an even more improbable transition from "The Big Three" to a young team led by Rondo. That transition, however, gets closer to reality by signing LeBron James.
Likelihood of LeBron Signing: 25-1
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Feelin' A Light Draft
As you may know, Thursday night was the NBA's annual draft, headlined by Kentucky freshman phenom point guard John Wall and NCAA Player of the Year Evan Turner of Ohio St. Normally, I do a "Winners and Losers" piece as a draft follow-up(mainly because I don't believe in draft grades), but this year is different. This year was a very ho-hum draft in terms of the caliber of talent that came out. After all, all of your big college basketball stars were stockpiled on a couple teams(Kansas, Kentucky, Duke) and most of the guys who went deep into last year's tournament were either virtual unknowns or didn't declare for this year's draft. Outside of the Top 5, the rest of the players selected provoked a collective shrug of the shoulders. Once you got past the lottery, there was really nobody taken at, say, 18 that was considerably better than the guy taken at 28. Hell, I turned the broadcast off after the Hornets took Kansas big man Cole Aldrich at 11 and proceeded to follow the draft on my phone the rest of the night(though that was mainly because I simply cannot stand Stuart Scott. He's the DJ Jazzy Jeff of ESPN).
Anyway, a couple of teams caught my eye....so here's my thoughts on them.
Washington Wizards: I covered most of my thoughts on the Wiz's night in my blog on PSB. Basically, Washington came into this draft with a chance to do some damage. They were already getting a franchise cornerstone in John Wall at one. They had the 17th pick which the Bulls suckered Washington into taking along with Kirk Hinrich before the draft. They also had Cleveland's pick at 30 and their 2nd rounder at 35. That's four of the first 35 picks. What did they do? They used Chicago's pick on the French Hasheem Thabeet. Kevin Seraphin is an athletic big man who could eventually develop into a decent big man(though I'd say that's a long shot, given he couldn't even dominate in France). In taking Seraphin, they ignored the chance of getting someone of equal athletic ability to play on the wing and complement Wall's elite passing skills. You can't tell me that Texas' Damion James or Oklahoma State's James Anderson couldn't drop 10-12 a game as the beneficiaries of some great John Wall dishes. On top of that, the Wizards are already waiting on JaVale McGee and Andray Blatche to develop into starter-quality big men. Now they add another to that mix.
There's also the issue of taking Kirk Hinrich's contract and blowing half of that cap space they spent the entire second half freeing up. Hinrich's a solid guard and he's definitely worth starter minutes if the team can deal Gilbert Arenas but who's taking Arenas' bloated contract? Maybe the Knicks if they fall flat in free agency? Maybe Memphis? Still, the chances are slim. You're paying Hinrich $17 mil over the next 2 seasons to be your 6th man.
The Wiz also swung a deal with Minnesota and got two more big men in Clemson forward Trevor Booker and Rutgers shotblocker Hamady N'diaye. Other than Wall, N'diaye might have the next best chance of making the team because he, unlike any of the other Wizards big men, can contest shots and actually provide some D. That being said, N'diaye is 240 pounds. He's a younger Theo Ratliff. Bigger centers are going to eat him alive. The same goes for Booker, who is crazy athletic but also crazy short at 6'7. Booker also doesn't have much in terms of offensive ability to benefit from Wall's presence. So, in essence, the team had four picks in a decent, yet not very deep draft, and left with one franchise player and three guys who will be out of the league by 2012. Good job, Ernie Grunfield.
Oklahoma City Thunder: The Thunder and GM Sam Presti were the anti-Wizards. Having already bought Miami's pick at 18, the Thunder also had picks at 21 and 26. Again, given the lack of depth in this draft, the Thunder's chances of finding a legit piece to add to that young core was slim. So what did they do? They swung a deal with the always-cheap Hornets to acquire New Orleans' choice at 11, Kansas center Cole Aldrich. Now, Aldrich is limited offensively but he's the kind of shotblocker/rebounder the team should have gotten midseason by trading for Marcus Camby. With Kevin Durant, James Harden, Jeff Green and Russell Westbrook, Aldrich doesn't need to be a scorer. He just needs to deny guys in the paint. The best part is, it only cost OKC their two late firsts and agreeing to harbor Morris Peterson's rotting corpse. With Miami's pick still in their possession, they got solid Kentucky guard Eric Bledsoe...and then dealt him to the Clippers for a future first round pick(which could be a lottery choice). So for the willingness to accept Daquan Cook and Morris Peterson's contracts, the Thunder got a young defensive stopper in Aldrich and a potential future lottery pick by dealing Bledsoe. THAT'S how you're supposed to build a contender.
Los Angeles Lakers: To me, the biggest statements on draft night were made by the two teams I think will be in the Western Conference Finals next year: The Lakers and the Thunder. With no first round pick, the Lakers got two decent sleepers in West Virgina small forward Devin Ebanks and UTEP forward Derrick Caracter. Ebanks is like a poor man's Trevor Ariza. He has a huge wingspan, is a very capable defender and can score in spurts. At worst, he gives the defending champs a reason to dump Adam Morrison's corpse where it belongs: The D-League. Caracter, meanwhile, is a solid inside scorer, a good passer for a big man and can be a beast on the boards when his mind is right. That, however, is the knock on Caracter. He's a bit of a headcase. When combined with Ron Artest, that can be a bit of a problem but Dr. Phil might be able to settle Caracter down if he puts the time in(or, if he doesn't retire). Both Caracter and Ebanks will be lucky to hold down the final two spots on the champs' roster, but they were good value for where they were taken.
New York Knicks: The Knicks were in a no-win situation. They already lost their first rounder, which ended up being the 9th overall pick by Utah, in the foolish Stephon Marbury trade made by one of the worst GMs in NBA history, Isiah Thomas. So, with that, the Knicks had to make things happen in the second round or try to deal their way into Round 1. They did neither. The Knicks were routinely rebuffed by teams all throughout the first round and when the Knicks finally went on the clock, they spent back-to-back picks on Syracuse's Andy Rautins and Stanford's Landry Fields. Both are rangy small forwards who can shoot the three. Neither can defend and neither are the kind of talent that will raise the eyebrows of LeBron James. Look, Knicks fans are willing to forgive this draft if the front office can lure the King to the Garden(or, worst case, a couple marquee guys in LeBron's place), but if the Knicks fall flat then there will need to be tanks on the Major Deegan. Both the aforementioned Ebanks and Caracter were available when the Knicks went on the clock as were Kansas point guard Sherron Collins(who actually went undrafted) as was Ebanks' teammate Da'Sean Butler and Louisville forward Samardo Samuels(also undrafted). All of them might have been better picks, but that point is moot. The Knicks' draft consists of one man: LeBron Ramone James. It doesn't matter if the Knicks drafted Pat Ewing again. If they miss out on LeBron, they better get the riot gear.
As for the rest of the pack, they were all victims of a lack of talent. The ROTY award this year will come down to the Top 5: Wall, Turner, Derrick Favors, Wesley Johnson and DeMarcus Cousins. Everyone else will probably be forgotten in a couple of years.....and that right there, sums up the 2010 NBA Draft.
Anyway, a couple of teams caught my eye....so here's my thoughts on them.
Washington Wizards: I covered most of my thoughts on the Wiz's night in my blog on PSB. Basically, Washington came into this draft with a chance to do some damage. They were already getting a franchise cornerstone in John Wall at one. They had the 17th pick which the Bulls suckered Washington into taking along with Kirk Hinrich before the draft. They also had Cleveland's pick at 30 and their 2nd rounder at 35. That's four of the first 35 picks. What did they do? They used Chicago's pick on the French Hasheem Thabeet. Kevin Seraphin is an athletic big man who could eventually develop into a decent big man(though I'd say that's a long shot, given he couldn't even dominate in France). In taking Seraphin, they ignored the chance of getting someone of equal athletic ability to play on the wing and complement Wall's elite passing skills. You can't tell me that Texas' Damion James or Oklahoma State's James Anderson couldn't drop 10-12 a game as the beneficiaries of some great John Wall dishes. On top of that, the Wizards are already waiting on JaVale McGee and Andray Blatche to develop into starter-quality big men. Now they add another to that mix.
There's also the issue of taking Kirk Hinrich's contract and blowing half of that cap space they spent the entire second half freeing up. Hinrich's a solid guard and he's definitely worth starter minutes if the team can deal Gilbert Arenas but who's taking Arenas' bloated contract? Maybe the Knicks if they fall flat in free agency? Maybe Memphis? Still, the chances are slim. You're paying Hinrich $17 mil over the next 2 seasons to be your 6th man.
The Wiz also swung a deal with Minnesota and got two more big men in Clemson forward Trevor Booker and Rutgers shotblocker Hamady N'diaye. Other than Wall, N'diaye might have the next best chance of making the team because he, unlike any of the other Wizards big men, can contest shots and actually provide some D. That being said, N'diaye is 240 pounds. He's a younger Theo Ratliff. Bigger centers are going to eat him alive. The same goes for Booker, who is crazy athletic but also crazy short at 6'7. Booker also doesn't have much in terms of offensive ability to benefit from Wall's presence. So, in essence, the team had four picks in a decent, yet not very deep draft, and left with one franchise player and three guys who will be out of the league by 2012. Good job, Ernie Grunfield.
Oklahoma City Thunder: The Thunder and GM Sam Presti were the anti-Wizards. Having already bought Miami's pick at 18, the Thunder also had picks at 21 and 26. Again, given the lack of depth in this draft, the Thunder's chances of finding a legit piece to add to that young core was slim. So what did they do? They swung a deal with the always-cheap Hornets to acquire New Orleans' choice at 11, Kansas center Cole Aldrich. Now, Aldrich is limited offensively but he's the kind of shotblocker/rebounder the team should have gotten midseason by trading for Marcus Camby. With Kevin Durant, James Harden, Jeff Green and Russell Westbrook, Aldrich doesn't need to be a scorer. He just needs to deny guys in the paint. The best part is, it only cost OKC their two late firsts and agreeing to harbor Morris Peterson's rotting corpse. With Miami's pick still in their possession, they got solid Kentucky guard Eric Bledsoe...and then dealt him to the Clippers for a future first round pick(which could be a lottery choice). So for the willingness to accept Daquan Cook and Morris Peterson's contracts, the Thunder got a young defensive stopper in Aldrich and a potential future lottery pick by dealing Bledsoe. THAT'S how you're supposed to build a contender.
Los Angeles Lakers: To me, the biggest statements on draft night were made by the two teams I think will be in the Western Conference Finals next year: The Lakers and the Thunder. With no first round pick, the Lakers got two decent sleepers in West Virgina small forward Devin Ebanks and UTEP forward Derrick Caracter. Ebanks is like a poor man's Trevor Ariza. He has a huge wingspan, is a very capable defender and can score in spurts. At worst, he gives the defending champs a reason to dump Adam Morrison's corpse where it belongs: The D-League. Caracter, meanwhile, is a solid inside scorer, a good passer for a big man and can be a beast on the boards when his mind is right. That, however, is the knock on Caracter. He's a bit of a headcase. When combined with Ron Artest, that can be a bit of a problem but Dr. Phil might be able to settle Caracter down if he puts the time in(or, if he doesn't retire). Both Caracter and Ebanks will be lucky to hold down the final two spots on the champs' roster, but they were good value for where they were taken.
New York Knicks: The Knicks were in a no-win situation. They already lost their first rounder, which ended up being the 9th overall pick by Utah, in the foolish Stephon Marbury trade made by one of the worst GMs in NBA history, Isiah Thomas. So, with that, the Knicks had to make things happen in the second round or try to deal their way into Round 1. They did neither. The Knicks were routinely rebuffed by teams all throughout the first round and when the Knicks finally went on the clock, they spent back-to-back picks on Syracuse's Andy Rautins and Stanford's Landry Fields. Both are rangy small forwards who can shoot the three. Neither can defend and neither are the kind of talent that will raise the eyebrows of LeBron James. Look, Knicks fans are willing to forgive this draft if the front office can lure the King to the Garden(or, worst case, a couple marquee guys in LeBron's place), but if the Knicks fall flat then there will need to be tanks on the Major Deegan. Both the aforementioned Ebanks and Caracter were available when the Knicks went on the clock as were Kansas point guard Sherron Collins(who actually went undrafted) as was Ebanks' teammate Da'Sean Butler and Louisville forward Samardo Samuels(also undrafted). All of them might have been better picks, but that point is moot. The Knicks' draft consists of one man: LeBron Ramone James. It doesn't matter if the Knicks drafted Pat Ewing again. If they miss out on LeBron, they better get the riot gear.
As for the rest of the pack, they were all victims of a lack of talent. The ROTY award this year will come down to the Top 5: Wall, Turner, Derrick Favors, Wesley Johnson and DeMarcus Cousins. Everyone else will probably be forgotten in a couple of years.....and that right there, sums up the 2010 NBA Draft.
Milk Carton All-Star of the Week
We had quite the week here at BoomRoastedSports. First and foremost, there was our unprecedented 439 hits thanks to yours truly's piece on StergTV. Since then, we've had the World Cup and Team USA's coming and going in the world's biggest soccer tournament. There was the NBA Draft(which I will be weighing in on in my next piece). The epic Wimbledon match which spanned longer than Megan Fox's relevance after Jonah Hex released. Needless to say, we've been too occupied to focus on everyone's favorite weekly feature. That is, until now.
It would have been easy to, in honor of this being the week of the NBA Draft, to put some worthless NBA Draft bust in this space like Pervous Ellison or Keith Van Horn. However, we here at BoomRoastedSports don't opt for the easy button. Instead, I thought it would be nice to give props to one of Gabe's sentimental favorites: Former Mets "slugger"(and I use that term loosely) Benny Agbayani.
Agbayani was drafted by the then-California Angels in the 25th round of the 1992 Draft but opted not to sign and was later taken in the 30th round the following year by the New York Mets. Like any run-of-the-mill outfielder with decent pop but little batting skill, he toiled in the minors until getting his call-up in 1998. He only made 16 plate appearances that year but came back in 1999 with an astounding(sarcasm alert) 14 home runs and 42 RBIs in his first full season at Shea. The next year was Agbayani's coming out party. He was the Mets' answer to Derek Jeter, hitting a clutch 11th inning grand slam against the Cubs in Tokyo for the Mets' first win. In the playoffs that year, he went yard with a 13th inning walk-off in the NLDS against the Giants and also drove in the game winning run in the only game the Mets won in the Subway Series that year.
All of that is fine and dandy but in the hearts of some, Agbayani will best remembered for something else that occurred during that epic 2000 season(which was Benny's best, hitting .289, 15 HRs, 60 RBI). On August 12th, with the bases juiced, Giants catcher Bobby Estalella popped out to Agbayani in the fourth. Agbayani, being the consummate people's champion, flicked the ball to a young fan sitting along left field. Problem was....there was only one out. The brainfart allowed the Giants to score two runs and Agbayani was spared the goat horns when the Mets came back to win 3-2. A couple years after that, Agbayani was shipped to Colorado in a 10-player buffet table's worth of future Milk Carton All-Stars. The Mets sent Todd Zeile with Agbayani to Colorado, as well as trading Lenny Harris and Glendon Rusch to Milwaukee. The Rockies gave the Mets sweet-swinging Russ Gload and up and comer Craig House(yup, sarcasm alert). The Mets also received sure-fire MVP candidate(I think you'll sense a theme here) Jeromy Burnitz as well as building blocks Lou Collier, Jeff D'Amico and Mark Sweeney from Milwaukee(Incase you still cared, Alex Ochoa was sent from Colorado to Milwaukee....you know, to make sure the deal wasn't one-sided and all).
Agbayani only hit six homers in 61 games while a member of the Rockies and was picked up off waivers later that year by Boston. He'd hit four more homers before calling it quits at the end of the 2002 season. For his career, Agbayani hit .274 with 39 homers and 156 RBIs....or as Albert Pujols calls it: "an off year".
So let's get the wave going for the most famous Hawaiian since Ashley Lelie....Benny Agbayani, everybody!
Thursday, June 24, 2010
There's a Place in France....
...where players yell at coaches and the president has to tell soccer players to practice.
One of the biggest stories coming out of this year's World Cup final is the implosion of the French side. The team is loaded with talent, was in the championship game in 2006, and had every reason to believe they would do well in this tourney too. But...they didn't.
We here at Boom Roasted Sports like to think we are of the people. We like to help. So here is a helpful timeline of the French team, from qualifying to their return home with their tails between their legs.
Let the fun start....
November 2009 - France beats Ireland in qualifying on the strength of Thierry Henry's handball (pictured above) and the win gets Les Bleus a spot in the World Cup final. Cheaters.
April 2010 - An underage prostitute admits to servicing Franck Ribery and two other players on the French national team. There's a "grass on the field" joke in there somewhere, but I'm not as good as Dave at coming up with such things.
April 20th - A really smart guy at Boom Roasted Sports said the French are "crazy talented but fragile psychologically," and predicted they would get beaten in the group by Mexico. (Excuse me while I pat myself on the back.)
June 4th - France loses to China in their final warm-up match before the Cup. There are reports even then of dissent and players not supporting the coach's tactics.
June 10th - On the eve of their opening match against Uruguay it is announced that Thierry "Fingers" Henry will start. It is reported that he had argued with manager Raymond Domenech until he was inserted into the line-up. Florent Malouda also argued with his coach, reportedly.
June 11th - France ties Uruguay in their first match. Malouda gets dropped after the game and refuses to support Domenech while sulking, which in France means drinking champagne, making snide comments, and smoking while holding cigarettes underhand.
June 17th - With many Irish fans in the stands pulling for Mexico, France gets smoked by El Tri, 2-0. At halftime of this game Domenech and Nicolas Anelka get into it. Anelka allegedly calls Domenech a "son of a whore," which is just as bad as calling someone anywhere else in the world a "son of a French whore."
June 19th - Anelka is sent home after the fight gets reported in the media.
June 20th - All hell breaks loose. The French team refuses to practice. The team director resigns. Domenech tattles and the president of the country is called in to make the team train.
June 22nd - Les Bleus get handled by the hosts, South Africa, and get bounced from the tournament. They go back home to France, presumably to drink champagne, make snide comments, and smoke cigarettes underhand.
There you go BRS fans, a handy dandy guide to French implosion. 'Til next time, reporting from South Africa (I wish) for Boom Roasted Sports, Gabe "Insert Cool Nickname Here" Rodriguez.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
I Want My StergTV!
We all have our addictions. Some are smokers. Some are drinkers. Some gamble. Some like to shop. My newest addiction? StergTV.
StergTV is the name of the webcast on UStream hosted by Jenn Sterger and normally airs in the hour or so leading up to Sterger's new show on Versus, The Daily Line. Anyone who has read my thoughts in this space knows that I am a Grade A skeptic(or hater....whichever label you choose), so when word got out that the former FSU cowgirl-turned-New York Jets analyst was spearheading an internet chat, I was both intrigued and concerned. After all, for years, female analysts with the kind of once-in-a-generation looks that Sterger possesses have turned out to be nothing more than pin-up models with limited sports knowledge who were used strictly to draw in the male demographic(cough..cough...Lisa Guerrerro..cough...cough). Here's what separates Sterger from that class of female: She has substance. On StergTV, Sterger showcases her uncanny wit and charm as well as her immense sports knowledge. She's quick to discuss her Rays and 'Noles, but also finds a way to both promote the upcoming Daily Line as well as survey the audience on the day's top sports topics ranging from the Stanley Cup to the Finals to vuvuzelas.
StergTV's viewership has been pretty impressive as well. On her June 2nd webcast, Sterger drew in over 13,000 viewers(most of which coming in either during or after the epic OT Game 3 of the Stanley Cup Finals that was airing on Versus), and on a normal night the webcast draws viewers in the quadruple digits(which is impressive, given the fact the show airs late in the night, Monday to Thursday, right around when Sportscenter is airing or while most males are either partying or resting for work the next day).
Sterger's webcast, like most shows with a strong cult following, even has its own band of regulars: a group of people who call themselves "The Sterge Protectors". What started out simply as a cute name by some creative wordsmith has turned into its own phenomenon. There are now Sterge Protector groups on Facebook, Sterge Protector T-Shirts, even Sterger herself has acknowledged her core followers at various times on The Daily Line. The fact that "The Sterge Protectors" exist is a testament to Sterger's ability to draw a crowd. She's a walking IMDB, quoting everything from Talladega Nights to South Park. Her pop culture references and down-to-Earth nature make her seem more approachable, which is key in a society filled with quick-to-fame celebs who'd rather not be bothered by their starstuck minions. On top of that, her sports acumen gives her a certain caliber of credibility amongst a normally sexist male demographic, who are quick to write off girls as just pretty sideline fodder. I, myself, a quick-witted sole with a knack for movie one-liners has been vastly entertained by Sterger's brand of comedy to the point that her webcast has become appointment television in the Leonardis house(even for my wife, who despises women in sports but LOVES Jenn Sterger). She's changed the game. She's become the rare female that men tune in to hear HER thoughts on sports rather than the other way around, as well as someone who can draw in normally-catty female viewers who wouldn't usually find themselves in a sports chatroom late at night to join the party. She doesn't just yap to her audience, but interacts with them, responding to questions, laughing at their jokes and even utilizing some of her followers' best work into her own routine. In short, she's become a people's champion.
I'm not sure whether the idea of unleashing Sterger on UStream was the idea of the show's producers to bring in new viewers or whether Sterger herself decided to try it out on her own, but what started out as a quaint curiosity for me has now turned into one of the more entertaining parts of my day. With Sterger's role on Daily Line limited(simple math: 1 hour, 4 mouths, someone's going to take a back seat), StergTV not only whets the appetite for people waiting to watch the show but also allows Sterger to make up for missed time by entertaining another audience. In essence, she's contributing to the ratings of two shows at once. Naturally, I'm being selfish and when I say I hope for the continued success of StergTV, but Sterger's presence as a stand-alone entity could eventually bring in a new breed of female sports personality. She's proof that you can be both a world-class beauty and knowledgeable of a male-dominated world, and that the ability to utilize both can get you places.
So from one people's champion to another, hat's off to Jenn Sterger on her outstanding work both online and on Versus, and HERE'S THE STERGTV!!!!!!!
Friday, June 18, 2010
No Air
Kobe Bryant's legacy.
That was the selling point of this year's NBA Finals. It was all the media talked about. It's why Gabe tuned in. Kobe Bryant trying to add to his resume was supposed to make everyone forget that we saw this movie between the Celtics and Lakers two years ago. It was supposed to make us forget the media's 180 on "The Black Mamba". It was supposed to make us forget everything. Who cares about everything else? This series was about Kobe.
And you know what? In the process of watching Kobe do work, we got a somewhat entertaining NBA Finals(or so I'm told, since I stayed true to my word of boycotting the Finals). Kobe Bryant showed why he is the best player in the game for the first 6 games of a back-and-forth championship series.
Then, Game 7 came along....and Kobe shit the bed.
Now, I know Laker fans and Kobe slurpers are going to point fingers at me and go on one of their "You're a Kobe hater!" diatribes. I assure you, as I've said many times, I do not hate Kobe Bryant. I think his 2003 sexual assault charge shouldn't have been swept under the rug by reporters and, at times, I think he tries to disguise his selfishness on the court with a PR-cultivated phony persona off of it in front of the flashing lights, but for the most part, I like Kobe Bryant. He's among the top five guys I enjoy watching in the game right now. He's one of the 15-20 greatest basketball players of all-time and he was spectacular in both the first six games of these Finals and throughout the postseason(especially against the Suns).
That being said, for weeks, we got fed the storyline of Kobe's chased of the great Michael Jordan. It's all we heard about. "Kobe's trying to pass Mike. He's only one ring away.....blah blah blah." Then, in the biggest game of his life, when the stakes were high and everything was on the line, Kobe Bryant went 6-for-24 with 23 points(led all Lakers scorers) and 15 rebounds. When the game was down to wire in the last few minutes, it was Ron Artest's shooting, Pau Gasol's rebounding and Sasha Vujacic's two clutch free throws that helped put championship banner #16 on the rafters of the Staples Center. Kobe's excuse for his poor performance? He was tired. Spent. Exhausted. I'm sorry, did you say you were tired? The biggest game of your career and you needed 40 winks? Weeks of stories about your legacy and you fall flat in the end? Really? THIS was your selling point, America!?
I said before Game 1 tipped off that we will learn nothing. That the teams were evenly matched and the Lakers will win in 7.....You can thank me later. When the clock hit zero, the big stories after the game were Ron Artest being Ron Artest and thanking his shrink and promoting his single at the same time during the biggest postgame interview of his life(Hey, whatever keeps him out of the stands and away from robbing liquor stores is OK by me). Do you think that would happen if this was Jordan's Bulls winning a close Game 7 for the NBA championship? Do you think His Airness would be taking a backseat to Dennis Rodman in the biggest game of his life? Do you think Jordan would be too tired to carry his team across the finish line? Jordan once dispatched the Utah Jazz while being sick with the flu. That game, Jordan went 13-27, played 44 minutes, scored 38 points, had 7 boards and 5 assists. Scottie Pippen and Luc Longley chipped in. They didn't steal the show. He didn't use the flu as his excuse because he didn't have to. He brought Chicago back from down 16 and the Bulls won by two. He willed himself and his team to victory. He didn't sit back and prayed his teammates would bail him out. He didn't pull a Kobe Bryant.
Is Jordan's Game 5 of the '97 Finals vs. Kobe's Game 7 last night an unfair comparison? Maybe. But you brought this on yourself. We always put things in front of Kobe Bryant for him to destroy. We always give him obstacles. After the breakup with Shaq, we all made a big fuss over Kobe not being able to win one without "The Diesel". So Kobe went out last year and won a ring without Shaq. This year, we had no real obstacle for him, so we put the best basketball player of the last 12 years against a ghost. We told him to go out and surpass Michael Jordan. Instead of asking Kobe Bryant to be his own stand-alone legend, we, like we have so many Jordan clones over the years and like we will do for decades after with LeBron James, asked him to slay the giant. Michael Wilbon made a point in the post-game discussion about how this generation only remembers the great players of now and forgets past legends so easily. He said Kobe was in the Top 20 ever, while Stuart Scott(the hyperbole king himself) tried to bait Wilbon into pushing him into the Top 10. Wilbon's point was never clearer than when moronic Lakers fans booed former Celtics legend Bill Russell(only the greatest big man this game has ever seen and perhaps the sports world's most accomplished winner) during the MVP coronation(which, of course, went to Kobe). Phil Jackson, Kobe's coach for all five titles and Jordan's coach for all of MJ's six, wouldn't go as far as to say that Kobe is the best player he's ever coached. Rather, Dr. Phil said "he's right up there". Translation: Jordan is still King. Kobe's still a prince.
Look, I despise Michael Jordan and I like Kobe. I could have easily banged the drum like so many will do these next few months that Kobe has dethroned MJ. Certainly, Kobe has dominated a tougher era and has managed to do so without even going to college. The acceleration from plucky young gunner to seasoned winner was almost instantaneous. He didn't have to wait nearly a decade to taste a championship like Jordan did and like James inevitably will. That being said, he's not Michael Jordan, and he never will be. Jordan vs. Bryant will be the Louis vs. Ali of our generation. Diehard Jordan fans will NEVER put Kobe ahead of MJ even if Bryant wins 12 championships and Lakers fans will always opt for their guy over Jordan, even when evidence like last night's stinker clearly shows that Jordan is still above Bryant. It's a neverending debate.
These Finals were supposed to be about Kobe's legacy, Kobe's chase of Jordan, Kobe's 5th ring. Instead, it should be about Kobe choking when it matters most. Of course, lucky for Lakers fans and Bryant himself, nobody is crazy enough to tell THAT story.
That's why I'M here.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
I'll Be The Judge Of That
It's June, and if you follow football, that only means one thing: it's holdout season. With so much down time between now and when we will inevitably have cameras on 24/7 Brett Favre watch, training camp holdouts have dominated the offseason NFL headlines over the last few weeks. Here's a look at the situations going on and my take on what employers should do with their disgruntled employees:
*Albert Haynesworth, DT, Washington Redskins
The Beef: Haynesworth was Washington's prize acquisition almost immediately after teams were given the green light to sign free agents last year. The Redskins gave the former Titan an unprecedented $100 million contract over 7 years($49 mil of it guaranteed and $32 mil of that $49 mil paid out in the first 13 months). After yet another dreadful Redskins season, Washington cut Jim Zorn loose as head coach and hired former 2-time Super Bowl winning head coach Mike Shanahan to take over. Shanahan's presence meant a switch from the 4-3 scheme(which Haynesworth had played in his entire pro career) to the 3-4(where Haynesworth would mainly clog up the middle as a nose tackle). The change in schemes annoyed Haynesworth to the point where he's refusing to show up for camp and demanding a trade. This, of course, coming just two months after the Redskins cut "Fat Albert" a $21 million bonus check.
The Verdict: CUT HIM. Haynesworth has an understandable concern, but his beef isn't legit. If he feels that the move to the 3-4 doesn't fit his skill set, then it makes sense for him to raise a stink. That being said, when you're being paid $100 million, that must mean you are talented enough to play in any formation a coach can dream up. Perhaps the pressure of being in a title-hungry town like the nation's capital and feeling like he has to live up to his large contract has worn on Haynesworth to the point that he's using the scheme shift as an excuse to kick rocks. Maybe the fact that his name was brought up initially in the Donovan McNabb trade talks gave him the impression that the Redskins didn't want him. Regardless, Haynesworth was paid nearly $40 million in the last year and a half for 12 games of work, 30 tackles and 4 sacks.....and that was in the scheme he was COMFORTABLE in. If Shanahan feels Haynesworth can't get it done or is unwilling to start his first year off in DC babysitting his overpaid nose tackle, then he has to show Haynesworth the door. Yes, there's the risk of Haynesworth signing with a division rival and rubbing it in Washington's face but what are the chances a team is willing to put up with this guy's antics? Also, what are the chances someone will want Haynesworth's contract? During the draft, only two teams stepped up with legit interest: St. Louis and Tennessee...and they weren't willing to sell the farm for someone being paid the biggest deal for a defensive player EVER. What's that say about his perception around the league? The 'Skins need to abort this thing now and just admit they messed up by opening up the checkbook too soon.
*Darrelle Revis, CB, New York Jets
The Beef: Revis emerged last season as not only the league's best corner, but probably the best defender in the NFL. He put on a show worthy, to some, of the Defensive Player of the Year(6 INT, 47 tackles, and most importantly, shutting down nearly every top WR in the game from Steve Smith to Randy Moss to Andre Johnson). For his troubles, Revis will be paid a grand total of $1 million this season. Compare that to a guy like Dunta Robinson, who is making around $9 million in his new contract with the Falcons but has never put on a season quite as grand as Revis' 2010 campaign, and you would come away thinking that the Jets are getting a bargain and "Revis Island" is getting jerked. Revis has hinted at holding out but has recently showed up at OTAs and had some discussion with head coach Rex Ryan on the matter.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. The Jets reportedly are willing to offer Revis an extension worth around $100 million. As they should. Revis is the face of the defense and, with him being able to opt out next year, would make a boatload of cash in free agency in an uncapped year. The Jets made some moves on defense in the offseason(DE/LB Jason Taylor, CBs Antonio Cromartie and rookie Kris Wilson) but none of that matters if Revis isn't locked up for the foreseeable future. Whatever Darrelle wants, the Jets should oblige because without "Revis Island", they are the ones who will be stranded.
*Chris Johnson, RB, Tennessee Titans
The Beef: Johnson's coming off a record-breaking 2010: NFL-record 2,509 yards from scrimmage, 2,006 of which coming on the ground, 16 total touchdowns(14 rushing). Still under his rookie contract, C.J. will make a paltry $550K this season. That's hardly a salary worthy of the best running back in the league. Naturally, Johnson's willing to sit on his ass as long as possible in order to get paid. For a Titans team that's already dealing with Vince Young's club incident and that just waved bye-bye to longtime defensive captain Keith Bulluck, they can't afford a prolonged holdout from its star runner.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN....BUT BE CAREFUL. I invoke the name Shaun Alexander here. There's a danger in overpaying a running back for previous seasons' work. Johnson deserves to be paid like an elite back. That being said, he's a running back. The normal shelf life of a running back is around 8 years. With no passing game to speak of and no LenDale White to take the hits, Johnson's in line for more punishment this season. You're rolling the dice that he doesn't tear his ACLs throughout that new deal. Remember what happened to Jamal Lewis after HIS 2,000 yard season? He was out of Baltimore three seasons later and never came close to those numbers from his career year. Johnson has a legitimate reason to want a raise, but his demands get too high, the Titans shouldn't rule out a trade. Now, hold on, before you get in an uproar. Johnson's a great back with blazing speed, soft hands and is a threat to go the distance on every touch....but he's not Superman. Right now, Johnson's stock is at an all-time high. You can get a king's ransom for C.J. if you floated trade rumors out there. I'm not saying the Titans SHOULD trade him, but if it looks like this thing is going nowhere, maybe a trade to, say, St. Louis for Steven Jackson and a couple high picks will scare C.J. straight.
*Shawne Merriman, LB, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Merriman isn't exactly a holdout, perse. "Lights Out" has simply refused to sign the tender offered by San Diego. So, some are looking for alterations to their contract, Merriman is looking for a contract. Period. Merriman is still property of the Chargers, but without his John Hancock on that offer sheet, he's untradeable. That means the Chargers are going to have to convince the former Defensive Rookie of the Year to sign his tender in hopes of a trade to follow or rescind the offer and let Merriman walk.
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Merriman was once the face of the Chargers' defense and the most feared pass rusher in the game. Now, he's more known for his dealings with steroids and Tila Tequila than sacking quarterbacks. Look, Shawne, you play for the team that kicked L.T. and Antonio Cromartie to the curb in the last three months and fired Marty Schottenheimer after a 14-2 season. You haven't done squat since 2006. That might as well be 1986 in the NFL. You're replaceable, buddy. Sign the tender and then get shipped out. It worked for Brandon Marshall. It can work for you. Don't try to play hardball with these guys....you will lose. As a Packers fan, I'd love to see Merriman complement Clay Matthews on the opposite side of that 3-4. Certianly, other teams in need of a little boost in the pass rush department will be interested in Merriman....but at a discount. He's coming two injury-plagued seasons and steroid accusations. Nobody's paying DeMarcus Ware money for the kind of production Merriman's been offering. Sign the tender. Go elsewhere. Wreak havoc. Then, you can sign a big contract and rub it in A.J. Smith's face. Until then, quit trying to have a battle of wits when you're ill-equipped.
*Vincent Jackson, WR, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Jackson's coming off his second-straight 1,000 yard season and enjoyed a breakout 2010 with 1,167 yards and 9 touchdowns. Because of that, Jackson wants something a little better from San Diego than the $3.268 million he would be set to be paid for next season if he signs his tender. The problem for both Jackson and the Bolts is that the June 15 deadline for Jackson to sign his tender passed and Jackson's salary for next season will now be $583K. With the Chargers not budging on a new contract, Jackson will probably not be seen on the field until Week 10.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. Jackson is the best receiver the Chargers have had in quite some time. Yes, they have the leverage here by being able to slash Jackson's salary, but who's really the big loser in this one? Jackson is inevitably going to get paid. Can the Chargers win until he comes to his senses? I don't think so(especially with another costly holdout on the roster who I will get to next). Jackson's 6'5, 241 pounds, he runs like a gazelle and jumps like a flea. He's easily one of the game's top deep threats and among the best red zone targets in the game. Who's replacing him? Malcolm Floyd? Josh Reed? Please. Plus, how is QB Phillip Rivers going to feel when he has to be without his favorite target for the first 10 weeks of the season? You really want to risk irritating your franchise face by being frugal? Sure, Jackson has a recent DUI, but he's not a belligerent drunk. Look at Jared Allen. Two DUIs and the Vikings still paid him top dollar. Give Jackson the money. If you're going to continue to dominate a division that is slowly improving around you, you need your young nucleus and that includes your star wideout.
*Marcus McNeill, OT, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Yup, that's right, San Diego has holdouts with three of their main stars. Like Jackson and Merriman, McNeill is turning his nose up at the Chargers' tender for $3.1 million. As one of the game's best pass protectors on one of the game's best aerial attacks, McNeill feels he should be paid like one of the elites....and rightfully so. After all, he's a two-time Pro Bowler and he's responsible for protecting the blind side of your $90 million quarterback, not to mention open holes for your new running back, Ryan Mathews. Like Jackson, McNeill's failure to sign by Tuesday will cut his salary to $600K and that means McNeill has no reason to show up before Week 10.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. Ask Aaron Rodgers how it felt last season to spend every snap running for his life behind an O-Line that couldn't protect him. You win in the NFL by dominating up front with line play. Being stingy with the cash on your elite offensive lineman is an easy recipe for disaster in this league. You think Rivers is pissed about being without Jackson? Imagine how he'll feel with McNeill in street clothes until Thanksgiving. It's one thing to be business savvy, it's another to be a complete idiot. There are positions you can skimp on. You can find a cheap pass rusher or safety. Offensive line and receiver? Not so much. Don't give any noise about Tra Thomas. He's 34, and he was last seen barely making a Jags team that was desperate for line help. San Diego got rid of LT, Cromartie, Jamal Williams and will eventually do away with Merriman. The money is there under the mattress, so who are you saving it for if it's not for an elite pass protector like Marcus McNeill?
*Logan Mankins, G, New England Patriots
The Beef: Mankins' troubles with the Pats stem from what he claims was a verbal agreement between his agents and New England's suits for the team to do right by their 2-time Pro Bowl guard after this past year(a deal agreed upon after Mankins did not want to sign a new deal with an uncertain CBA on the horizon). Mankins now feels like the team's gone back on its word and their recent offer of $7 million per over five years is not enough to keep Mankins from wanting a trade out of town.
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Mankins' aggravation perplexes me. After all, unlike McNeill and a couple other holdouts, he's actually getting offered a legit deal. $7 mil per doesn't make him higher paid than, say Saints' guard Jahari Evans, but it puts Mankins in the top 5. You're really going to nitpick over a couple million, Logan? These are the Pats. They are a perennial championship contender. You'd rather be the richest man in Buffalo? What kind of message would that send? Don't claim to be a "team player" than turn your nose up at $35 million bucks when the franchise QB you will be protecting is due for a new contract at the end of the year. Sure, protecting Tom Brady comes first and foremost in Beantown, but the Pats have proven they won't be held hostage by disgruntled employees. See what happened to Richard Seymour, Logan? You want to spend your prime on a sinking ship like Oakland? Go right ahead. Guards like Mankins are bit tougher to come by, but they aren't impossible to find, especially for a team that drafts as well as New England. The Pats are also in need of a running back, which means they can dangle Mankins in exchange for maybe a Marshawn Lynch or a Marion Barber. I understand Mankins being upset over the principle of the matter, but the NFL is a business. Like in any business, the suits are going to lie to the underlings. So you got lied to? Big fucking deal. Find me an employee who hasn't been lied to by his employer and I'll find 100 guys who have just as fast. Take the contract, Logan, or give the team of list of places you'd like to go house hunting....but don't go crying about $7 mil a year being not enough in a nationwide recession.
*Reggie Wayne, WR, Indianapolis Colts
The Beef: After a stellar career as the Jerry Rice to Peyton Manning's Joe Montana, Reggie Wayne has decided it is time to barter for one last payday. Despite already having a contract that will pay him $8.2 million(with a base salary of $5.47 million), Wayne wants to go back to the negotiating table. The problem for Wayne is two-fold. One, he's going up again Bill Polian, who is less likely to budge than a statue when it comes to contract negotiations. Second, the Colts have someone on a the roster with a wee bit higher priority of getting a new contract....some guy named Peyton Manning. That doesn't give Wayne much of a leg to stand on in his search for a new deal(neither does the fact that DE Robert Mathis is also wanting a raise).
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Like Mankins, Wayne needs to can it. Let me read you off a list, Reggie. Chad Ochocinco. Michael Crabtree. Anquan Boldin. Those are the most recent examples of guys at your position who stomped their feet for a new deal and lost....and, pretty soon, Vincent Jackson will be on that list as well. Here's another list: Randy Moss, Larry Fitzgerald, Crabtree, Calvin Johnson. Those are the only guys making more than you in the NFL, Reggie. Your deal puts you on par with Andre Johnson(better than you), Roddy White and Steve Smith(certainly, on your level). It also puts you ahead of Greg Jennings(on the verge of passing you) and Wes Welker(comparable numbers the last two years). Here's another list, in case you don't like the last two: Anthony Gonzalez, Austin Collie, Dallas Clark, Pierre Garcon. Those are the guys on the depth chart besides you. Guess what, Reggie? They can catch, too. Maybe not as good as you, but I don't think that bothers your buddy Peyton too much. Ask Peyton how much he missed Gonzalez last year or Marvin Harrison, for that matter. You're replaceable, Reggie. Not only that, you're 31. You're no spring chicken. This is the team that shipped out Edgerrin James. The team that made the Super Bowl with two rookie receivers. You're great, Reggie, and last season was outstanding, but you have absolutely NO leverage here. So just show up for work or be prepared to suit up for Tampa Bay this season.
*Albert Haynesworth, DT, Washington Redskins
The Beef: Haynesworth was Washington's prize acquisition almost immediately after teams were given the green light to sign free agents last year. The Redskins gave the former Titan an unprecedented $100 million contract over 7 years($49 mil of it guaranteed and $32 mil of that $49 mil paid out in the first 13 months). After yet another dreadful Redskins season, Washington cut Jim Zorn loose as head coach and hired former 2-time Super Bowl winning head coach Mike Shanahan to take over. Shanahan's presence meant a switch from the 4-3 scheme(which Haynesworth had played in his entire pro career) to the 3-4(where Haynesworth would mainly clog up the middle as a nose tackle). The change in schemes annoyed Haynesworth to the point where he's refusing to show up for camp and demanding a trade. This, of course, coming just two months after the Redskins cut "Fat Albert" a $21 million bonus check.
The Verdict: CUT HIM. Haynesworth has an understandable concern, but his beef isn't legit. If he feels that the move to the 3-4 doesn't fit his skill set, then it makes sense for him to raise a stink. That being said, when you're being paid $100 million, that must mean you are talented enough to play in any formation a coach can dream up. Perhaps the pressure of being in a title-hungry town like the nation's capital and feeling like he has to live up to his large contract has worn on Haynesworth to the point that he's using the scheme shift as an excuse to kick rocks. Maybe the fact that his name was brought up initially in the Donovan McNabb trade talks gave him the impression that the Redskins didn't want him. Regardless, Haynesworth was paid nearly $40 million in the last year and a half for 12 games of work, 30 tackles and 4 sacks.....and that was in the scheme he was COMFORTABLE in. If Shanahan feels Haynesworth can't get it done or is unwilling to start his first year off in DC babysitting his overpaid nose tackle, then he has to show Haynesworth the door. Yes, there's the risk of Haynesworth signing with a division rival and rubbing it in Washington's face but what are the chances a team is willing to put up with this guy's antics? Also, what are the chances someone will want Haynesworth's contract? During the draft, only two teams stepped up with legit interest: St. Louis and Tennessee...and they weren't willing to sell the farm for someone being paid the biggest deal for a defensive player EVER. What's that say about his perception around the league? The 'Skins need to abort this thing now and just admit they messed up by opening up the checkbook too soon.
*Darrelle Revis, CB, New York Jets
The Beef: Revis emerged last season as not only the league's best corner, but probably the best defender in the NFL. He put on a show worthy, to some, of the Defensive Player of the Year(6 INT, 47 tackles, and most importantly, shutting down nearly every top WR in the game from Steve Smith to Randy Moss to Andre Johnson). For his troubles, Revis will be paid a grand total of $1 million this season. Compare that to a guy like Dunta Robinson, who is making around $9 million in his new contract with the Falcons but has never put on a season quite as grand as Revis' 2010 campaign, and you would come away thinking that the Jets are getting a bargain and "Revis Island" is getting jerked. Revis has hinted at holding out but has recently showed up at OTAs and had some discussion with head coach Rex Ryan on the matter.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. The Jets reportedly are willing to offer Revis an extension worth around $100 million. As they should. Revis is the face of the defense and, with him being able to opt out next year, would make a boatload of cash in free agency in an uncapped year. The Jets made some moves on defense in the offseason(DE/LB Jason Taylor, CBs Antonio Cromartie and rookie Kris Wilson) but none of that matters if Revis isn't locked up for the foreseeable future. Whatever Darrelle wants, the Jets should oblige because without "Revis Island", they are the ones who will be stranded.
*Chris Johnson, RB, Tennessee Titans
The Beef: Johnson's coming off a record-breaking 2010: NFL-record 2,509 yards from scrimmage, 2,006 of which coming on the ground, 16 total touchdowns(14 rushing). Still under his rookie contract, C.J. will make a paltry $550K this season. That's hardly a salary worthy of the best running back in the league. Naturally, Johnson's willing to sit on his ass as long as possible in order to get paid. For a Titans team that's already dealing with Vince Young's club incident and that just waved bye-bye to longtime defensive captain Keith Bulluck, they can't afford a prolonged holdout from its star runner.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN....BUT BE CAREFUL. I invoke the name Shaun Alexander here. There's a danger in overpaying a running back for previous seasons' work. Johnson deserves to be paid like an elite back. That being said, he's a running back. The normal shelf life of a running back is around 8 years. With no passing game to speak of and no LenDale White to take the hits, Johnson's in line for more punishment this season. You're rolling the dice that he doesn't tear his ACLs throughout that new deal. Remember what happened to Jamal Lewis after HIS 2,000 yard season? He was out of Baltimore three seasons later and never came close to those numbers from his career year. Johnson has a legitimate reason to want a raise, but his demands get too high, the Titans shouldn't rule out a trade. Now, hold on, before you get in an uproar. Johnson's a great back with blazing speed, soft hands and is a threat to go the distance on every touch....but he's not Superman. Right now, Johnson's stock is at an all-time high. You can get a king's ransom for C.J. if you floated trade rumors out there. I'm not saying the Titans SHOULD trade him, but if it looks like this thing is going nowhere, maybe a trade to, say, St. Louis for Steven Jackson and a couple high picks will scare C.J. straight.
*Shawne Merriman, LB, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Merriman isn't exactly a holdout, perse. "Lights Out" has simply refused to sign the tender offered by San Diego. So, some are looking for alterations to their contract, Merriman is looking for a contract. Period. Merriman is still property of the Chargers, but without his John Hancock on that offer sheet, he's untradeable. That means the Chargers are going to have to convince the former Defensive Rookie of the Year to sign his tender in hopes of a trade to follow or rescind the offer and let Merriman walk.
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Merriman was once the face of the Chargers' defense and the most feared pass rusher in the game. Now, he's more known for his dealings with steroids and Tila Tequila than sacking quarterbacks. Look, Shawne, you play for the team that kicked L.T. and Antonio Cromartie to the curb in the last three months and fired Marty Schottenheimer after a 14-2 season. You haven't done squat since 2006. That might as well be 1986 in the NFL. You're replaceable, buddy. Sign the tender and then get shipped out. It worked for Brandon Marshall. It can work for you. Don't try to play hardball with these guys....you will lose. As a Packers fan, I'd love to see Merriman complement Clay Matthews on the opposite side of that 3-4. Certianly, other teams in need of a little boost in the pass rush department will be interested in Merriman....but at a discount. He's coming two injury-plagued seasons and steroid accusations. Nobody's paying DeMarcus Ware money for the kind of production Merriman's been offering. Sign the tender. Go elsewhere. Wreak havoc. Then, you can sign a big contract and rub it in A.J. Smith's face. Until then, quit trying to have a battle of wits when you're ill-equipped.
*Vincent Jackson, WR, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Jackson's coming off his second-straight 1,000 yard season and enjoyed a breakout 2010 with 1,167 yards and 9 touchdowns. Because of that, Jackson wants something a little better from San Diego than the $3.268 million he would be set to be paid for next season if he signs his tender. The problem for both Jackson and the Bolts is that the June 15 deadline for Jackson to sign his tender passed and Jackson's salary for next season will now be $583K. With the Chargers not budging on a new contract, Jackson will probably not be seen on the field until Week 10.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. Jackson is the best receiver the Chargers have had in quite some time. Yes, they have the leverage here by being able to slash Jackson's salary, but who's really the big loser in this one? Jackson is inevitably going to get paid. Can the Chargers win until he comes to his senses? I don't think so(especially with another costly holdout on the roster who I will get to next). Jackson's 6'5, 241 pounds, he runs like a gazelle and jumps like a flea. He's easily one of the game's top deep threats and among the best red zone targets in the game. Who's replacing him? Malcolm Floyd? Josh Reed? Please. Plus, how is QB Phillip Rivers going to feel when he has to be without his favorite target for the first 10 weeks of the season? You really want to risk irritating your franchise face by being frugal? Sure, Jackson has a recent DUI, but he's not a belligerent drunk. Look at Jared Allen. Two DUIs and the Vikings still paid him top dollar. Give Jackson the money. If you're going to continue to dominate a division that is slowly improving around you, you need your young nucleus and that includes your star wideout.
*Marcus McNeill, OT, San Diego Chargers
The Beef: Yup, that's right, San Diego has holdouts with three of their main stars. Like Jackson and Merriman, McNeill is turning his nose up at the Chargers' tender for $3.1 million. As one of the game's best pass protectors on one of the game's best aerial attacks, McNeill feels he should be paid like one of the elites....and rightfully so. After all, he's a two-time Pro Bowler and he's responsible for protecting the blind side of your $90 million quarterback, not to mention open holes for your new running back, Ryan Mathews. Like Jackson, McNeill's failure to sign by Tuesday will cut his salary to $600K and that means McNeill has no reason to show up before Week 10.
The Verdict: PAY THE MAN. Ask Aaron Rodgers how it felt last season to spend every snap running for his life behind an O-Line that couldn't protect him. You win in the NFL by dominating up front with line play. Being stingy with the cash on your elite offensive lineman is an easy recipe for disaster in this league. You think Rivers is pissed about being without Jackson? Imagine how he'll feel with McNeill in street clothes until Thanksgiving. It's one thing to be business savvy, it's another to be a complete idiot. There are positions you can skimp on. You can find a cheap pass rusher or safety. Offensive line and receiver? Not so much. Don't give any noise about Tra Thomas. He's 34, and he was last seen barely making a Jags team that was desperate for line help. San Diego got rid of LT, Cromartie, Jamal Williams and will eventually do away with Merriman. The money is there under the mattress, so who are you saving it for if it's not for an elite pass protector like Marcus McNeill?
*Logan Mankins, G, New England Patriots
The Beef: Mankins' troubles with the Pats stem from what he claims was a verbal agreement between his agents and New England's suits for the team to do right by their 2-time Pro Bowl guard after this past year(a deal agreed upon after Mankins did not want to sign a new deal with an uncertain CBA on the horizon). Mankins now feels like the team's gone back on its word and their recent offer of $7 million per over five years is not enough to keep Mankins from wanting a trade out of town.
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Mankins' aggravation perplexes me. After all, unlike McNeill and a couple other holdouts, he's actually getting offered a legit deal. $7 mil per doesn't make him higher paid than, say Saints' guard Jahari Evans, but it puts Mankins in the top 5. You're really going to nitpick over a couple million, Logan? These are the Pats. They are a perennial championship contender. You'd rather be the richest man in Buffalo? What kind of message would that send? Don't claim to be a "team player" than turn your nose up at $35 million bucks when the franchise QB you will be protecting is due for a new contract at the end of the year. Sure, protecting Tom Brady comes first and foremost in Beantown, but the Pats have proven they won't be held hostage by disgruntled employees. See what happened to Richard Seymour, Logan? You want to spend your prime on a sinking ship like Oakland? Go right ahead. Guards like Mankins are bit tougher to come by, but they aren't impossible to find, especially for a team that drafts as well as New England. The Pats are also in need of a running back, which means they can dangle Mankins in exchange for maybe a Marshawn Lynch or a Marion Barber. I understand Mankins being upset over the principle of the matter, but the NFL is a business. Like in any business, the suits are going to lie to the underlings. So you got lied to? Big fucking deal. Find me an employee who hasn't been lied to by his employer and I'll find 100 guys who have just as fast. Take the contract, Logan, or give the team of list of places you'd like to go house hunting....but don't go crying about $7 mil a year being not enough in a nationwide recession.
*Reggie Wayne, WR, Indianapolis Colts
The Beef: After a stellar career as the Jerry Rice to Peyton Manning's Joe Montana, Reggie Wayne has decided it is time to barter for one last payday. Despite already having a contract that will pay him $8.2 million(with a base salary of $5.47 million), Wayne wants to go back to the negotiating table. The problem for Wayne is two-fold. One, he's going up again Bill Polian, who is less likely to budge than a statue when it comes to contract negotiations. Second, the Colts have someone on a the roster with a wee bit higher priority of getting a new contract....some guy named Peyton Manning. That doesn't give Wayne much of a leg to stand on in his search for a new deal(neither does the fact that DE Robert Mathis is also wanting a raise).
The Verdict: TRADE HIM. Like Mankins, Wayne needs to can it. Let me read you off a list, Reggie. Chad Ochocinco. Michael Crabtree. Anquan Boldin. Those are the most recent examples of guys at your position who stomped their feet for a new deal and lost....and, pretty soon, Vincent Jackson will be on that list as well. Here's another list: Randy Moss, Larry Fitzgerald, Crabtree, Calvin Johnson. Those are the only guys making more than you in the NFL, Reggie. Your deal puts you on par with Andre Johnson(better than you), Roddy White and Steve Smith(certainly, on your level). It also puts you ahead of Greg Jennings(on the verge of passing you) and Wes Welker(comparable numbers the last two years). Here's another list, in case you don't like the last two: Anthony Gonzalez, Austin Collie, Dallas Clark, Pierre Garcon. Those are the guys on the depth chart besides you. Guess what, Reggie? They can catch, too. Maybe not as good as you, but I don't think that bothers your buddy Peyton too much. Ask Peyton how much he missed Gonzalez last year or Marvin Harrison, for that matter. You're replaceable, Reggie. Not only that, you're 31. You're no spring chicken. This is the team that shipped out Edgerrin James. The team that made the Super Bowl with two rookie receivers. You're great, Reggie, and last season was outstanding, but you have absolutely NO leverage here. So just show up for work or be prepared to suit up for Tampa Bay this season.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Milk Carton All-Star of the Week
We've showcased plenty of nobodies each week in the Milk Carton All-Star feature, but this week, we give you a man who is well-traveled. Maybe that's why he's nicknamed after a car.
Longtime MLB shortstop "Rolls Royce" Clayton is the epitome of major league journeyman. In his 17 seasons in the majors, Clayton played for 12 franchises. He started off with the San Francisco Giants, then went to St. Louis(where he had his lone All-Star appearance in 1997), then to Texas, then to the Chicago White Sox then a few brief stints in Milwaukee, Colorado, Arizona, Washington, Cincinnati, Toronto and Boston. I even think he played on one of MTV's Rock N Jock teams.
Clayton's best season came in his aforementioned All-Star '97 campaign with the Cardinals. That year, he hit a pedestrian .266 with 9 home runs, 61 RBI and 30 stolen bases. Nicknamed "Rolls Royce" for his speedy wheels, Clayton stole 231 bags in his career. Despite playing in the Steroids Era though, Clayton had as much of power stroke as Abe Vigoda, hitting 110 homers in 17 years. Simply put, he makes Rafael Belliard look like Alex Rodriguez. Clayton was known for his charm and his flashy glove. He was one of the few players daring enough to wear micro-braids(Remember, this is long before the Williams sisters) and you would often see Clayton on Sportscenter catching air while turning two and just narrowly avoiding getting his eye taken out by one of his dreads. For the most part though, Royce was just a notable name on a lineup card. He was never much to talk about. Hell, he's not even the most famous Royce anymore. Google the name Royce and you'll find Clayton behind MMA fighter Royce Gracie and one-hit wonder rapper Royce Da 5'9.
Regardless, let's give a warm welcome to a relative never-was.....the poor man's Mark Lemke....Royce Clayton, everybody!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
World Cup Group H
World Cup Group H
Chile
Honduras
Spain
Switzerland
Who will win?
Spain
Interesting story line number one....
In Honduras' first World Cup appearance in 1982 they played Spain to a 1-1 draw, which was something of an upset.
Interesting story line number two....
This group has the most decorated coaches in the tournament, easily.
How they'll finish -
4. Honduras - I think this group and can be divided in the middle easily, with Honduras and Switzerland being at the bottom. I think either of those teams could finish at the bottom of the group. I am going with Honduras though because of the style of soccer they play. They play an extremely defensive style, especially when away from home. They usually have only one attacker and keep everyone else at the back of the pitch. Teams who play like that rarely do well in the World Cup.
3. Switzerland - As I said, the Swiss are definitely in the bottom of this group. I am giving them the edge over Honduras because of coaching. Their coach, German Ottmat Hitzfeld, has won on every level and has just too many trophies and championships to list individually. This team as also played more games against teams in this tournament than any other squad. They were on 6-8-2 in those matches, but their experience will help them a little and they should finish higher than Honduras.
2. Chile - Chile is part of one of the toughest qualifying groups in the world, the CONMEBOL. They finished one point behind Brazil and beat Argentina in qualifying. This squad is no joke. The Chileans don't usually play well away from home, but they should fare better in South Africa. South Africa's climate and altitude are things the Chileans should be used too. They lost to each of the teams in this group in friendlies, but should do much better in the Cup because each of those matches were away from home. They should have momentum from their qualifying campaign and will take that into the tournament.
1. Spain - They won the Euro 2008. Undefeated in qualifying. Untied in qualifying. Ranked 2nd in offense in the world. Ranked 2nd on defense in the world. Ranked 2nd overall in the world (behind Brazil in all categories, which is mostly a product of Brazil being 10-0-0 in their last ten matches compared to Spain's 8-1-1.) That's a hell of a resume. More interestingly, they are one of the most cohesive units in the tournament. They don't have big stars but play a great team game. They are the 2004 Detroit Pistons of this year's World Cup. They will have no trouble breezing through this group and beyond.
Friday, June 11, 2010
I Wish.....
We're just under five months away from my birthday and a little over six months til Christmas. Still, there are things on my current wish list that simply cannot wait that long....and here they are:
1. The Atlanta Hawks hiring Mark Jackson as head coach, with Stuart Scott as an assistant: On the scale of bad NBA broadcasters, Mark Jackson doesn't rate nearly as low as, say, Reggie Miller. Still, at times, he's a one-trick pony. If I had a dollar for every time Jax yelped "Mama, there goes that man!" during these NBA playoffs, I could retire by sundown. Jackson has had his name circle around the coaching circuit for quite some time now. Do I think he'll make a good coach? We'll see. If I'm ready to tune him out after one broadcast, I can only imagine what selfish jocks will be doing after hearing Captian Cliche's catchphrases over and over again.
As for Stuart Scott, only the presence of Chris Berman at ESPN keeps Scott's schtick from being old. We get it, Stu, you think you're current with your hip-hop infused one-liners, but your run is over, my man. Hip-hop died about five years ago and so did the relevance of half of your routine. Plus, and I know I don't have much to talk here, you have a face that's built for radio. That lazy eye of yours is so damn crooked, you'd be better served just rocking an eye patch. So, please, Stu, go scream "Boo-ya!" on the bench with Jax while your lazy eye oogles some of the ATL's finest and save all the cheesy, annoying one-liners to your boy Boomer.
2. The New York Giants accept AshleyMadison.com's $25 million offer for naming rights of the new Meadowlands: Give the AshleyMadison people a tip of the cap for having some balls. A pro-adultery website asking for naming rights of a major sports arena in the midst of the Tiger Woods scandal? Well played, my friends. Seriously, only a couple years removed from the Eliot Spitzer fiasco, why not have a hook-up website for cheaters promote themselves in Spitzer's old stomping grounds? You wouldn't want to hear the infamously glib Joe Buck try to come up with a witty joke while doing a Giants-Cowboys game at AshleyMadison.com Field? Frank Caliendo could add at least another 10 seconds on his 15 minutes of fame with this story. Look, I know the NFL has an image to uphold and they aren't going to have a stadium set in the biggest sports market associated with anything sex-related after dealing with Big Ben all winter, but all of your big-time businesses are filled with their own type of sleaziness. Why not throw a bone to a company that at least has the stones not to hide theirs?
3. The NCAA must go a step further in their punishment of former USC RB Reggie Bush by stripping him of girlfriend Kim Kardashian: I don't really follow celebrity couples enough to know whether Bush N' Tush are still together and I think, for the most part, the NCAA cracking down on collegiate athletes taking handouts is bullshit because a. the players should get something for all of the money they bring in to the universities, conferences as well as the NCAA itself and b. it's not like the NCAA doesn't know about this stuff when it goes on. They just don't want to ruin any current ratings by striking down a powerhouse like USC while their at their peak. Of course you punish USC now. They are coming off their worst season in a while and they just lost their legendary head coach. You don't really think it takes five years to launch an investigation into shady off-field dealings between boosters and young athletes, do you?
Anyway, back to Bush, I know he's losing his Heisman and his NCAA championship but that's not enough. He can buy OJ's Heisman with the money he gets from Subway. You want to hit Reggie Bush where it hurts....how about banning him from Kim Kardashian's smoking hot ass? Adding insult to injury, Kim K must then date all of the prominent members of the 2004 Auburn team(You know, the team that got left out of the title game because NCAA football is too stupid to implement a playoff system). That's right. I want to see Kim K sitting in "The Black Hole" cheering on her new man, Jason Campbell. I want to see her chillin' in South Beach giving Karlos Dansby and Ronnie Brown lapdances. I want to see her make a sex tape with Cadillac Williams.....while wearing a Reggie Bush jersey.....ok, maybe that's going too far. Regardless, stripping a newly minted Super Bowl champion of some college swag that's collecting dust in his closet doesn't equate to the type of punishment current Trojans have to deal with now as a result of Bush's greed. Sure, Reggie's a good looking guy, he can find a new woman, but how do you think things are going to go when he sees Kim K on the cover of US Weekly getting motorboated by Carlos Rogers? You don't recover from losing Kim Kardashian. Just ask Ray J.
4. The ACC and Big East must combine to form their own power conference: With the Big 12 now becoming the Pac-16, with the exception of Nebraska going to the Big Ten, other conferences now have to get their weight up. The SEC is powerful enough on its own to not need any help(though I'm sure they wouldn't mind Texas A+M joining the fray). The Big East essentially has four big time teams: West Virginia, Pittsburgh, Cincinnati and Rutgers. You can throw South Florida in that mix, if you like. I know the ACC is big enough on its own after they just added Virginia Tech and Boston College and a couple others a few years ago, but really, who do they have? North Carolina isn't quite there yet. Virginia Tech always disappoints. Miami and Florida State aren't what they once were. UVA blows.
Look, I'm a Rutgers fan, but the Big East lost any legitimacy when BC and Tech left a few years ago. Look at how Cincinatti did in their bowl game. They just aren't a real conference anymore. You want to split the Big East up and send some teams into different places, that's fine, too, but with the Pac-10 adding superpowers like Texas and Oklahoma and the Big Ten adding the once-mighty Cornhuskers, and the SEC having the last three BCS championships under their belt, the bottom two of the major conferences are going to have to unite to keep up. I know this screws my Scarlet Knights by putting them in a conference with some heavy hitters, but maybe that helps them get some better recruits now that they aren't playing the FIUs and Norfolk States of the world.
5. President Obama should allow a reality show inwhich 10 celebrities are placed in a wild jungle, with the last person breathing being the winner....: .....and those celebrities are as follows: Tyler Perry, Justin Bieber, Jon and Kate Gosselin, Lady Gaga, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, Jesse James, Soulja Boy and Terry Crews. Now, I have nothing against Terry Crews, but clearly, he's the winner here even if all nine of these flunkies team up against him at once. That's the point. America is filled with far too many fringe celebrities. Tyler Perry since on a mound of money by making movies based on every stereotype in the book. He's Robert Townsend without talent. Justin Bieber? Look, if you follow me on Twitter(@DLSmooth82), you know how much I can't stand that little puke. Sorry. I'm 27. I don't do bubble gum pop. If you're going to sing about love, do it in a smooth way like John Mayer does. Do it in a way that makes grown women take off their clothes, not teeny boppers squeal like they are trapped in a bathroom stall with Ben Roethlisberger. As for the Gosselins, those greedy bastards should have been destroyed years ago. Any couple that pretends to enjoy each other's company solely for the purpose of raking in loads of cash by showcasing their soon-to-be mentally deformed eight kids to America and promoting bullshit books and all the other garbage that show afforded them deserves to be put in a sleeper hold by Terry Crews. Kate Gosslin has managed to outsuck her dickless ex-husband. Before, she was just a ruthless bitch......but now she's a ruthless bitch whose 15 minutes of fame won't end quietly. Dancing With The Stars? Really? What, was Coolio unavailable? Was Betty White overbooked? Lady Gaga.....sigh. Look, I was never a David Bowie fan, so I certianly have no place in my heart for his transvestite clone. As for "Speidi". Pratt is a devil douche and Montag is about two surgeries away from containing more plastic than a truckload of 2-liter Coke. If anyone was a 2-1 favorite to die while getting her ninth boob job, Heidi Montag is the absolute front-runner. Jesse James...I guess I'm supposed to have a problem with him as a married man, but really, all celebrities cheat. He just happened to get caught at the worst possible time: When his celebrity wife hit her peak. If "The Blind Side" tanks like "All About Steve" did, we suddenly don't give too much of a shit about Sandra Bullock's husband diddling skanks in a hotel room, but because Bullock won an Oscar and now has all the limelight, everything gets amplified....including the infidelity of a yutz who was only famous for fixing motorcycles. He probably has the best chance of beating Crews, but that's assuming he doesn't kill himself after he tries to bang Gaga and realizes he/she is a really a dude. Then, there's Soulja Boy. I don't blame Soulja Boy for ruining hip-hop. I blame the millions of suburban white kids who think his music is cool. As a rapper, Soulja Boy has less range than Paris Hilton. Granted, nature will take its course and Soulja Boy will join Nelly and Jibbs and Young Joc on the bench with the rest of the flash-in-a-pan ringtone rappers, but if we can speed that process up, that would be even better. (Note: Lil Wayne would have made this list, but Weezy is probably getting it bad enough from the dude in prison who is tearing his back out.)
So, that's all I ask, President Obama. I know you have alot on your plate with the oil spill and the war and the economy and healthcare and the Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup, but if you can just sanction a thinning of the herd so he can put some people with actual talent on television, it may help you get re-elected more than fixing any of these other issues would.
1. The Atlanta Hawks hiring Mark Jackson as head coach, with Stuart Scott as an assistant: On the scale of bad NBA broadcasters, Mark Jackson doesn't rate nearly as low as, say, Reggie Miller. Still, at times, he's a one-trick pony. If I had a dollar for every time Jax yelped "Mama, there goes that man!" during these NBA playoffs, I could retire by sundown. Jackson has had his name circle around the coaching circuit for quite some time now. Do I think he'll make a good coach? We'll see. If I'm ready to tune him out after one broadcast, I can only imagine what selfish jocks will be doing after hearing Captian Cliche's catchphrases over and over again.
As for Stuart Scott, only the presence of Chris Berman at ESPN keeps Scott's schtick from being old. We get it, Stu, you think you're current with your hip-hop infused one-liners, but your run is over, my man. Hip-hop died about five years ago and so did the relevance of half of your routine. Plus, and I know I don't have much to talk here, you have a face that's built for radio. That lazy eye of yours is so damn crooked, you'd be better served just rocking an eye patch. So, please, Stu, go scream "Boo-ya!" on the bench with Jax while your lazy eye oogles some of the ATL's finest and save all the cheesy, annoying one-liners to your boy Boomer.
2. The New York Giants accept AshleyMadison.com's $25 million offer for naming rights of the new Meadowlands: Give the AshleyMadison people a tip of the cap for having some balls. A pro-adultery website asking for naming rights of a major sports arena in the midst of the Tiger Woods scandal? Well played, my friends. Seriously, only a couple years removed from the Eliot Spitzer fiasco, why not have a hook-up website for cheaters promote themselves in Spitzer's old stomping grounds? You wouldn't want to hear the infamously glib Joe Buck try to come up with a witty joke while doing a Giants-Cowboys game at AshleyMadison.com Field? Frank Caliendo could add at least another 10 seconds on his 15 minutes of fame with this story. Look, I know the NFL has an image to uphold and they aren't going to have a stadium set in the biggest sports market associated with anything sex-related after dealing with Big Ben all winter, but all of your big-time businesses are filled with their own type of sleaziness. Why not throw a bone to a company that at least has the stones not to hide theirs?
3. The NCAA must go a step further in their punishment of former USC RB Reggie Bush by stripping him of girlfriend Kim Kardashian: I don't really follow celebrity couples enough to know whether Bush N' Tush are still together and I think, for the most part, the NCAA cracking down on collegiate athletes taking handouts is bullshit because a. the players should get something for all of the money they bring in to the universities, conferences as well as the NCAA itself and b. it's not like the NCAA doesn't know about this stuff when it goes on. They just don't want to ruin any current ratings by striking down a powerhouse like USC while their at their peak. Of course you punish USC now. They are coming off their worst season in a while and they just lost their legendary head coach. You don't really think it takes five years to launch an investigation into shady off-field dealings between boosters and young athletes, do you?
Anyway, back to Bush, I know he's losing his Heisman and his NCAA championship but that's not enough. He can buy OJ's Heisman with the money he gets from Subway. You want to hit Reggie Bush where it hurts....how about banning him from Kim Kardashian's smoking hot ass? Adding insult to injury, Kim K must then date all of the prominent members of the 2004 Auburn team(You know, the team that got left out of the title game because NCAA football is too stupid to implement a playoff system). That's right. I want to see Kim K sitting in "The Black Hole" cheering on her new man, Jason Campbell. I want to see her chillin' in South Beach giving Karlos Dansby and Ronnie Brown lapdances. I want to see her make a sex tape with Cadillac Williams.....while wearing a Reggie Bush jersey.....ok, maybe that's going too far. Regardless, stripping a newly minted Super Bowl champion of some college swag that's collecting dust in his closet doesn't equate to the type of punishment current Trojans have to deal with now as a result of Bush's greed. Sure, Reggie's a good looking guy, he can find a new woman, but how do you think things are going to go when he sees Kim K on the cover of US Weekly getting motorboated by Carlos Rogers? You don't recover from losing Kim Kardashian. Just ask Ray J.
4. The ACC and Big East must combine to form their own power conference: With the Big 12 now becoming the Pac-16, with the exception of Nebraska going to the Big Ten, other conferences now have to get their weight up. The SEC is powerful enough on its own to not need any help(though I'm sure they wouldn't mind Texas A+M joining the fray). The Big East essentially has four big time teams: West Virginia, Pittsburgh, Cincinnati and Rutgers. You can throw South Florida in that mix, if you like. I know the ACC is big enough on its own after they just added Virginia Tech and Boston College and a couple others a few years ago, but really, who do they have? North Carolina isn't quite there yet. Virginia Tech always disappoints. Miami and Florida State aren't what they once were. UVA blows.
Look, I'm a Rutgers fan, but the Big East lost any legitimacy when BC and Tech left a few years ago. Look at how Cincinatti did in their bowl game. They just aren't a real conference anymore. You want to split the Big East up and send some teams into different places, that's fine, too, but with the Pac-10 adding superpowers like Texas and Oklahoma and the Big Ten adding the once-mighty Cornhuskers, and the SEC having the last three BCS championships under their belt, the bottom two of the major conferences are going to have to unite to keep up. I know this screws my Scarlet Knights by putting them in a conference with some heavy hitters, but maybe that helps them get some better recruits now that they aren't playing the FIUs and Norfolk States of the world.
5. President Obama should allow a reality show inwhich 10 celebrities are placed in a wild jungle, with the last person breathing being the winner....: .....and those celebrities are as follows: Tyler Perry, Justin Bieber, Jon and Kate Gosselin, Lady Gaga, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, Jesse James, Soulja Boy and Terry Crews. Now, I have nothing against Terry Crews, but clearly, he's the winner here even if all nine of these flunkies team up against him at once. That's the point. America is filled with far too many fringe celebrities. Tyler Perry since on a mound of money by making movies based on every stereotype in the book. He's Robert Townsend without talent. Justin Bieber? Look, if you follow me on Twitter(@DLSmooth82), you know how much I can't stand that little puke. Sorry. I'm 27. I don't do bubble gum pop. If you're going to sing about love, do it in a smooth way like John Mayer does. Do it in a way that makes grown women take off their clothes, not teeny boppers squeal like they are trapped in a bathroom stall with Ben Roethlisberger. As for the Gosselins, those greedy bastards should have been destroyed years ago. Any couple that pretends to enjoy each other's company solely for the purpose of raking in loads of cash by showcasing their soon-to-be mentally deformed eight kids to America and promoting bullshit books and all the other garbage that show afforded them deserves to be put in a sleeper hold by Terry Crews. Kate Gosslin has managed to outsuck her dickless ex-husband. Before, she was just a ruthless bitch......but now she's a ruthless bitch whose 15 minutes of fame won't end quietly. Dancing With The Stars? Really? What, was Coolio unavailable? Was Betty White overbooked? Lady Gaga.....sigh. Look, I was never a David Bowie fan, so I certianly have no place in my heart for his transvestite clone. As for "Speidi". Pratt is a devil douche and Montag is about two surgeries away from containing more plastic than a truckload of 2-liter Coke. If anyone was a 2-1 favorite to die while getting her ninth boob job, Heidi Montag is the absolute front-runner. Jesse James...I guess I'm supposed to have a problem with him as a married man, but really, all celebrities cheat. He just happened to get caught at the worst possible time: When his celebrity wife hit her peak. If "The Blind Side" tanks like "All About Steve" did, we suddenly don't give too much of a shit about Sandra Bullock's husband diddling skanks in a hotel room, but because Bullock won an Oscar and now has all the limelight, everything gets amplified....including the infidelity of a yutz who was only famous for fixing motorcycles. He probably has the best chance of beating Crews, but that's assuming he doesn't kill himself after he tries to bang Gaga and realizes he/she is a really a dude. Then, there's Soulja Boy. I don't blame Soulja Boy for ruining hip-hop. I blame the millions of suburban white kids who think his music is cool. As a rapper, Soulja Boy has less range than Paris Hilton. Granted, nature will take its course and Soulja Boy will join Nelly and Jibbs and Young Joc on the bench with the rest of the flash-in-a-pan ringtone rappers, but if we can speed that process up, that would be even better. (Note: Lil Wayne would have made this list, but Weezy is probably getting it bad enough from the dude in prison who is tearing his back out.)
So, that's all I ask, President Obama. I know you have alot on your plate with the oil spill and the war and the economy and healthcare and the Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup, but if you can just sanction a thinning of the herd so he can put some people with actual talent on television, it may help you get re-elected more than fixing any of these other issues would.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
World Cup Group G
So here it is, what we have all been waiting for, the 2010 Group of Death. With the no. 1 and no. 3 ranked teams in the world in the group, one can see why. It would have been an even tougher road had this group not seen some key injuries.
World Cup Group
Brazil
Ivory Coast
North Korea
Portugal
Who will win?
Brazil or Portugal
No chance?
North Korea
How they'll finish -
4. North Korea - Little was known about the North Koreans before qualifying, thanks to Kim Jong-Il and his Kim Jong ilk. What we know now is they play very defensively and their coach tried to smuggle an additional striker, disguised as a goalie, on the roster. The North Koreans purposely play stingy defense which something teams do when they know they can't really compete with stronger teams. Get strong goal-tending and defense and hope for a break away goal, just the the U.S. did against England in 1950. We also played like thugs in that game, but don't expect that from North Korea. So, the Chollima will be going home early, just don't try telling that to Kim Jong-Il.
3. Ivory Coast - As recently as three weeks ago I would have said that Ivory Coast and Ghana each had the best chance to become the first African nation to win the World Cup. Injuries have derailed that for both teams. Ghana has lost Michael Eissen for the tournament and now the Ivory Coast will have to deal with superstar Didier Drogba's elbow injury. Drogba may be able to play but even if he does he will be severely limited. The Elephants are going to try and prove they are more than a one man team, but they really aren't. As Drogba goes so goes the team. Their other big issue is at keeper. Boubacar Barry is not very good, but he is the best option they have. If Drogba were fit they would be one of the best teams in the tourney, but he's not, so they're not. Getting to the round of 16 will be a long shot for them.
2. Portugal - In keeping with the theme of teams who want to prove that they are more than one player, let's look at the Portuguese. They are led by Cristiano Ronaldo, who I bet even Dave has heard of. The difference between Portugal and the Ivory Coast is the Portuguese actually have someone to compliment their star. Brazilian-born but newly nationalized player Liedson will be huge help for the team. He will allow Ronaldo to loosen up and play wider, where he is better. Oh, and Portugal is the 3rd ranked team in the world. They should have no trouble getting out of the group, but I think they will get edged out by Brazil for the top spot.
1. Brazil - This ain't your daddy's Selecao. Brazil is known for being high flying and offensive. This team is tough and plays great defense. They are also loaded with stars but they play a total team game. This will also be the last hurrah for their coach, Dunga. He has said he is going to resign after the Cup. He has not been popular because of the style of play he instituted and has been blamed for many problems in Brazil outside of soccer. The fact is though, the Brazilians have lost only one game in two years. They are coming into the cup as the no. 1 team in the world and holding the top spot in the tournament. Their game against Portugal will decide the finishing order of the group, but they should have no trouble getting one of the top two spots.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Milk Carton All-Star of the Week
We dug deep in the crates for this week's Milk Carton All-Star. I had to do numerous Google searches for this man because, quite frankly, I forgot what the hell he looked like. Chances are, by the end of this, you will, too.
Dave Ragone is just one of a litany of highly touted Louisville quarterbacks who went on to shit the bed in the NFL (A list that includes Brian Brohm and Hunter Cantwell). Ragone was a third round pick of the Houston Texans in 2003, oddly enough a year after the Texans would peg fellow bust David Carr as their first overall pick and franchise quarterback. Thanks to an offensive line that was leakier than Rick James' Jheri Curl, injuries caused by an overload of sacks forced Carr to the sidelines and Ragone into the lineup. In two games with Houston in his rookie season, Ragone was 20 of 40 for 145 yards(which was, oddly enough, just four yards longer than Ragone's nose) and one pick. He never threw a touchdown in the NFL and somehow managed to get sacked eight times. In fact, if you Google images of Ragone from his pro career, most of them involve him running for his life from an oncoming pass rush.
Ragone's biggest after-college impact came in the now-defunct NFL Europe. In 2005, he led the Berlin Thunder to the World Bowl and was named the league's Offensive MVP. A year later, he was waived by Houston and picked up by Cincinnati, where he lasted all of a month before being traded to St. Louis. Ragone spent that season on the Rams' practice squad and by season's end, he was out of the NFL. Ragone's name resurfaced this year when he was hired to be the QB/WR coach of the UFL's Hartford Colonials.
So let's give it up for another Louisville waste of space....Dave Ragone, everybody.
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